Does Etiquette Have a Future?

[Flavus Aquila]

Does etiquette have a future?

It's no secret that I idealise old-world manners and etiquette: polite ways of going about things, and restraint in social activities.

The present reality seems to reduce manners to a clipped minimum, mostly practiced by service industry workers, and flustered parents. Etiquette seems reduced to posting realistic pictures on tinder, and attempting to anticipate and avoid giving politicised offense.

Are old-school manners dead, never to return?... Will there be new versions of manners, and what will they look like?

Is etiquette dead? Are there any somewhat formal customs about how you interact with strangers, or form new relationships? Is it just play-it-by-ear?.. or a matter of stumbling across people with whom we gel?

 

[the]

Based on what I've read, manners (as in the kind Emily Post writes about) seems to be something only useful to the upper class. Manners are what distinguishes haves vs have nots. If you are a have not they will giggle and point in their upper class ways which seems to go against the concept altogether.

Other than that people are generally socially graceful where I live.

What is an example of a manner that doesn't occur now but occurred "back then"?

 

[Artisan]

Does etiquette have a future?

It's no secret that I idealise old-world manners and etiquette: polite ways of going about things, and restraint in social activities.

The present reality seems to reduce manners to a clipped minimum, mostly practiced by service industry workers, and flustered parents. Etiquette seems reduced to posting realistic pictures on tinder, and attempting to anticipate and avoid giving politicised offense.

Are old-school manners dead, never to return?... Will there be new versions of manners, and what will they look like?

Is etiquette dead? Are there any somewhat formal customs about how you interact with strangers, or form new relationships? Is it just play-it-by-ear?.. or a matter of stumbling across people with whom we gel?

At this time in most levels of society I would say yes, etiquette is dead. However. If we look at history, everything makes a comeback. It might take a while, but it will return and be valued again at some point. I guess it would return around the time that societal standards recover from the decline it has been going through for years now.

If we look at Sci-Fi books, Etiquette always return as well whilst nudity becomes more acceptable. I think this is because people as a whole always seek a way to define themselves among-st the masses. Etiquette is a tool with which this can be done. I can quite well imagine it happening that etiquette will return as such a tool and as a way to indicate ones superiority to others on a more subliminal level.

That said. It will likely take years before it returns. Especially since what is easy is usually the rage these days. Designer clothes suddenly look like someone who can't sew and measure for shit and its in. Minimalism and contemporary is considered design in all things from UI design to interior design. We are already seeing a return of "retro" patterns for interiors, pretty soon stuff like old/antique closets with intricate works will be back as feature pieces rather than ikea mass furniture. Every style will be back in one form or another at some point though. Etiquette is something intricate and will likely return as well to offset something else.

 

[Lurk]

Not in the United States.

Courtesy is seen as a weakness.

 

[Sriracha]

It will always have a future with me (or probably any other ISFJ for that matter.)

 

[Sriracha]

Not in the United States.

Courtesy is seen as a weakness.

Depends on how you view it. I see it as patience and kindness (excluding circumstances that require one to be assertive.)

 

[the]

Not in the United States.

Courtesy is seen as a weakness.

I thought we are talking about etiquette, not courtesy.

 

[Pin]

The United States is too sub-culturally diverse. That's a weakness and a strength. It's a weakness because making decisions will always be slow, and a strength because you can choose what you like and dislike from different subcultures (i.e manners).

This state of affairs is confusing for a lot of people because what's ethical and proper is very complicated. Modern life comes with too many questions to ask and choices to make.

Personally, I don't intentionally step-outside of my lane too often regarding different cultures and lifestyles; it's not the most rewarding use of my time. Change is fine when it's worth my while.

 

[Lurk]

I thought we are talking about etiquette, not courtesy.

I apologize for taking liberty.

Courtesy is a core component of etiquette.