Celibacy. | Page 2 | INFJ Forum

Celibacy.

I don't think that long-term celibacy is healthy. The body needs some kind of sexual relief, and as one of the few sexual animal that derives pleasure from sexual intercourse, we have a drive for it. If we turn it off, the energy doesn't go away. Schopenhauer spoke of the human will as being the aggressive force that keeps us alive and going forward. We can't turn our need to reproduce off completely. We're programmed to have children from nature, like any other animal. Okay, I think I've made my opinion heard now, I'll stop typing.
 
Celibacy can help lead to spiritual enlightenment. You will learn things about your body and spirit you most likely would not learn any other way. You will see light instead of darkness. You will learn how important your thoughts are.
It will eventually place you on your knees. Spiritual enlightenment. Answers. Inner peace. Understanding. The way of life becomes apparent to each individual, without guilt or doubt. This was my experience. It is not copied and pasted.
 
I think celibacy and refusal of sexual relief are two totally different things. And refusal of sexual relief is scientifically unhealthy.

That being said if I don't orgasm at least 1-3 times a week I'm a goddamn crazy person o.o
 
I think celibacy and refusal of sexual relief are two totally different things. And refusal of sexual relief is scientifically unhealthy.

That being said if I don't orgasm at least 1-3 times a week I'm a goddamn crazy person o.o

If that's the case then I see nothing negative in your definition of celibacy. My definition of celibacy is the complete rejection of sexual relief, buddhist monk style.

Celibacy can help lead to spiritual enlightenment. You will learn things about your body and spirit you most likely would not learn any other way. You will see light instead of darkness. You will learn how important your thoughts are.
It will eventually place you on your knees. Spiritual enlightenment. Answers. Inner peace. Understanding. The way of life becomes apparent to each individual, without guilt or doubt. This was my experience. It is not copied and pasted.

I'm all for people doing spiritual experimentations with celibacy for pie in the sky reasons, but I don't think long-term celibacy is healthy.
 
I'm all for people doing spiritual experimentations with celibacy for pie in the sky reasons, but I don't think long-term celibacy is healthy.

human spiritual lives are not pie in the sky. we obtain genuine meaning from our spiritual practices, that provides us satisfaction in life.

your argument about what constitutes human "health", which appears to be a matter of psychological health since refraining from sexual intercourse is certainly not unhealthy for the body, seem to place excessive emphasis on our biological bodies and evolutionary history. our minds have become far more cognitively and emotionally complex than what is required for our reproductive survival as a species.
 
human spiritual lives are not pie in the sky. we obtain genuine meaning from our spiritual practices, that provides us satisfaction in life.

Sure. I envy that aspect of it.

your argument about what constitutes human "health", which appears to be a matter of psychological health since refraining from sexual intercourse is certainly not unhealthy for the body, seem to place excessive emphasis on our biological bodies and evolutionary history. our minds have become far more cognitively and emotionally complex than what is required for our reproductive survival as a species.

There's substantial links between celibacy and increased cancer risks, testosterone deficiency, growth hormone deficiency and lower dopamine production. Sure it's a psychological issue primarily, but it does have physical consequences too.

By the way, are you saying that psychological health isn't as substantial as physical health?

Again, celibacy to me means no sexual relief at all. No masturbation, too. That's the type of celibacy that I've been presented with.
 
Well I mean like.. If you practice extreme prolonged celibacy, chances are you have a weirdo lifestyle that includes other weirdness too. Doesn't necessarily mean that it causes cancer etc. Unless it's significant or has been studied rigorously with experimentation, don't take weak pop culture science "reported"/leaked correlations like that so seriously.
 
I have a very simple take on it: what's the point?
When you use hard logic against your primal desires, you're gonna have a bad time mmmkay
 
One question I'd rather ask is if you do give in, is it automatically better. The case for celibacy should involve some realism. Denying the expression of your sexual desires in a sexual manner can be healthy, and cleansing as someone said. I think that there should also be some understanding that it's not healthy to think that sexual relief is an answer to anything either. If someone is celibate for a while, and then decides not to be, their life may not be any better or worse than before. So, going into celibacy thinking that you're depriving yourself may be just as damaging. You can feel as if you're missing out if you commit to celibacy, but you could also be missing out on something more substantive if you do give in sexual desire too easily. Again, sex for sex sake is not as great as everyone insists. If I'm not going to be celibate, I'd rather give it up for emotional, social, and sexual connection and commitment all rolled in one, not just one night of meaningless sex which can make you feel ill and regretful. I think the key is not to be a slave to sexual desire just as it is about valuing yourself beyond your celibacy, and not judging who you are by whether or not you had sex recently.
 
I think everyone needs to understand the definition of celibacy before they go about debating the topic. Celibacy means the state of abstaining from marriage and sexual relations. Sexual relations MEAN sexual behavior between individuals, especially sexual intercourse. Individual MEANS a single human being as distinct from a group, class, or family. Which means that! The PLURAL of individual is MORE THAN ONE PERSON.
*sigh*
What a lot of you guys seem to be describing is refusal of sexual release. That is an entirely different topic that has nothing to do with the definition of celibacy and when you are arguing the two and calling them by the same name you will have communication problems.
Please don't be ignorant guys. Definitions of words are very black and white. Just because you don't know what the name of this thing that you are trying to describe is does not mean it 'sounds like' this word that it is not. You use context clues to find the definition of a word, you do not use context clues to define a word.
*bangs head on desk*
 
I didn't have sex for 6 months between last year and this year. I didn't feel any different than when having sex frequently. I didn't feel good or like a better person. I felt like me, except I wasn't having sex. Now i'm having a lot more sex and I enjoy it but I don't feel much different. I enjoy sex, I enjoy sharing that closeness with another person especially if I care about them. Sex with people i don't have feelings for on the other hand does make me feel dirty and doesn't quite bring the satisfaction that sex with someone I care about. There is nothing like waking up next to a person you care about and not minding that you both have morning breath, you smell because you haven't taken a shower yet, your hair is a complete mess and generally you both look raunchy from trying to sleep on a twin bed together. Despite all of this, you still find each other incredibly sexy. For me, there is no better feeling.
 
We are all different. Someone that has been sexually active, stopping for six months, might not notice the things other people under different scenarios notice.

A 30 year old virgin would see different things than the six month abstinence.

A sexually aktive adult that chooses to abstain from any and all stimulation for several years will learn different things. (active)

Children should know this is a wise choice before they lose their opportunities they might not otherwise have. Peer pressure has caused many a person to lose their innocence. It cannot be brought back. Let them choose, and be proud of them if they wish to abstain.
 
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We are all different. Someone that has been sexually active, stopping for six months, might not notice the things other people under different scenarios notice.

A 30 year old virgin would see different things than the six month abstinence.

A sexually active adult that chooses to abstain from any and all stimulation for several years will learn different things.

Children should know this is a wise choice before they lose their opportunities they might not otherwise have. Peer pressure has caused many a person to lose their innocence. It cannot be brought back. Let them choose, and be proud of them if they wish to abstain.

I don't disagree but the I think it is a double edged sword. Having grown up in a culture that treats sex like it is evil when it isn't. Everyone is always striving to be perfect by avoiding any type of sexual stimulation because it is wrong. It's not healthy either and it might be the reason why Utah has the highest porn abuse problem in the country. So many sexually frustrated individuals who can't be themselves and feel guilty about having sexual feelings which causes them to spiral and seek a release which happens to be sexual which then fuels their guilt even more. Highly unhealthy and this come from them abstaining from stimulation due to the societal pressure in regard to it versus it being their own decision. In my own personal opinion, abstinence is over valued and over praised.

Edit: This may be simplifying it too much. But it is like those that see drugs, alcohol, food, etc... as evil. They are all just tools. If you have self control, you need not fear them. All of them can be healthy when used in moderation. Sex is not much different. Going out and sleeping with every person you see and not using protection isn't advised. Neither is being afraid of your own body and seeing the pleasurable experience of sexual stimulation as evil.

Just my two cents.
 
I don't disagree but the I think it is a double edged sword. Having grown up in a culture that treats sex like it is evil when it isn't. Everyone is always striving to be perfect by avoiding any type of sexual stimulation because it is wrong. It's not healthy either and it might be the reason why Utah has the highest porn abuse problem in the country. So many sexually frustrated individuals who can't be themselves and feel guilty about having sexual feelings which causes them to spiral and seek a release which happens to be sexual which then fuels their guilt even more. Highly unhealthy and this come from them abstaining from stimulation due to the societal pressure in regard to it versus it being their own decision. In my own personal opinion, abstinence is over valued and over praised.

Edit: This may be simplifying it too much. But it is like those that see drugs, alcohol, food, etc... as evil. They are all just tools. If you have self control, you need not fear them. All of them can be healthy when used in moderation. Sex is not much different. Going out and sleeping with every person you see and not using protection isn't advised. Neither is being afraid of your own body and seeing the pleasurable experience of sexual stimulation as evil.

Just my two cents.

To clarify because this could be taken in multiple ways. I mean in regards to adults. As far as teens go, I am support of waiting until adulthood but that has to be their choice. I did.
 
There's substantial links between celibacy and increased cancer risks, testosterone deficiency, growth hormone deficiency and lower dopamine production. Sure it's a psychological issue primarily, but it does have physical consequences too.

By the way, are you saying that psychological health isn't as substantial as physical health?

Again, celibacy to me means no sexual relief at all. No masturbation, too. That's the type of celibacy that I've been presented with.

in the context of any personal and individual decision to refrain from engaging in sexual intercourse, what i am saying is that psychological health is a greater concern than evolutionary theory.

it is abundantly clear that this thread has never been about refusal to experience orgasm or sexual release. this thread has nothing to do with, say, Saint Thomas More flagellating himself to distract himself from the drive or desire to masturbate. this thread has been about abstaining from sexual intercourse with other people. if you read through the posts that have been made, you will see that the concern of this thread has always been about abstinence from sexual intercourse. your personal notion of what is entailed in celibacy is not relevant to what is being discussed on this thread.
 
in the context of any personal and individual decision to refrain from engaging in sexual intercourse, what i am saying is that psychological health is a greater concern than evolutionary theory.

That's what I was saying.

it is abundantly clear that this thread has never been about refusal to experience orgasm or sexual release. this thread has nothing to do with, say, Saint Thomas More flagellating himself to distract himself from the drive or desire to masturbate. this thread has been about abstaining from sexual intercourse with other people. if you read through the posts that have been made, you will see that the concern of this thread has always been about abstinence from sexual intercourse. your personal notion of what is entailed in celibacy is not relevant to what is being discussed on this thread.

I shared a common stance on celibacy, on that is more common where I come from. You, amongst other people, wrote of using celibacy for spiritual reasons, which also happens to be the reason why people choose to forego all sexual pleasures. Thank you for assuming that I haven't read the thread, by the way. I'm going to assume that you wish to assert some kind of cultural importance by name dropping Saint Thomas More. Well, by the power vested in me by Tsongkhapa I request that you get off my ass and focus on your own vague points.
 
That's what I was saying.



I shared a common stance on celibacy, on that is more common where I come from. You, amongst other people, wrote of using celibacy for spiritual reasons, which also happens to be the reason why people choose to forego all sexual pleasures. Thank you for assuming that I haven't read the thread, by the way. I'm going to assume that you wish to assert some kind of cultural importance by name dropping Saint Thomas More. Well, by the power vested in me by Tsongkhapa I request that you get off my ass and focus on your own vague points.

awesome! so we are agreed that no one on the thread apart from you has ever been discussing refraining from sexual release? thats so awesome. now we are all on the same page.
 
awesome! so we are agreed that no one on the thread apart from you has ever been discussing refraining from sexual release? thats so awesome. now we are all on the same page.

I understand that reading and comprehending written language is hard for invisible people, so let me make my point more accessible for you:

celibacy cover many things.
celibacy cover a lot of meanings
celibacy done many different ways!
celibacy colorful subject.
 
I understand that reading and comprehending written language is hard for invisible people, so let me make my point more accessible for you:

celibacy cover many things.
celibacy cover a lot of meanings
celibacy done many different ways!
celibacy colorful subject.

Do you even grammar?