!!!Anger!!! | INFJ Forum

!!!Anger!!!

6string

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Mar 22, 2011
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How do you deal with anger?

Are you able to express your anger?
Or does it build up to a breaking point?
Do you face your anger?
Do you bottle it up?
Do you throw tantrums?
Do you find expressive ways to deal with it?
Do you blast angry music, loud and with repetition?
Do you break down and cry?

How do you deal with your anger?
 
As soon as I notice I am angry I seek to change that, I use the energy anger gives me to think quickly and decisvely and seek the problem. If I am not able to control my anger I might go for a walk, run, or maybe do a long weight lifting session. Anger can be good though as it might initiate you to make a change because of it arising. Just a little thought..

I am known for bottling it up slightly. But usually I have an instant release or I just take a step back to cool down if I can. I tend to be a very patient person so that stops a lot of anger arising.
 
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well i tend to "snap" once in a while (every few months).
gets pretty gnarly
keeps it bottled up till the fuse goes kaboom.
 
Are you able to express your anger?
Or does it build up to a breaking point?
Do you face your anger?
Do you bottle it up?
Do you throw tantrums?
Do you find expressive ways to deal with it?
Do you blast angry music, loud and with repetition?
Do you break down and cry?

How do you deal with your anger?

I find it incredibly difficult to face my anger. I tend to be the type of person who bottles it all up until breaking point and then I chuck a massive tantrum, usually at my husband, who usually does the same thing right back at me...

we just can't get mildly annoyed at each other and deal with the issue, we have to wait till we can't hold it anymore and have a blazing argument about it that gets us in trouble with the neighbours...

after that I tend to just cry and cry and cry...
 
I find it incredibly difficult to face my anger. I tend to be the type of person who bottles it all up until breaking point and then I chuck a massive tantrum, usually at my husband, who usually does the same thing right back at me...

after that I tend to just cry and cry and cry...

I too, have difficulty facing my anger. I tend to get confused by my anger, because as I hold it in, and it it multiplies by the hour, it gets the the point that I am blinded by the anger, and I can't understand how something so seemingly small to others, has created such a beast within me.

I haven't learned how to express it, and by the time I snap, no one else understands it's intensity. Where it came from and why. Those who witness think it's over something so small. They can't see the whole picture. The pain behind the anger. The hurt they caused. To them it was such a minor thing. Which makes me feel even more insignificant, which angers me even more.

I don't know how to talk about things before they blow up. I don't know how to face those who upset me. I don't know how to talk about it.

I'm a grown ass fuckin adult, who doesn't understand the rawness and complexity of her own emotions. This just adds to the frustrations, and the feelings of worthlessness.

It's like I hyper-focus on whatever emotion it is I am feeling, and nothing else exists.

...No wonder I feel so lost in this world
 
Read where it said, "Be angry, and sin not." Man, was that a tough pill to swallow in my younger days.

If I focus anger toward someone, sometimes bad things happen and I feel guilty. I thus try to control mine long enough to vent privately.

There seems to be such a thing as righteous anger.
 
Anger has always been pretty close to me. Not in a tempermental, childish way. But more like pushing against barriers; indignant and infuriated at boundaries all around me - telling me I can't do something or am not allowed to do something when I know that's bullshit.

Sometimes I think it's sick, but I get off on the resistance. I like it when life tries to puff it's chest and stand in my way cause I get to grit my teeth and kick it in the throat. Half the time I get my ass kicked but the other half I win and that's sweet. I have to draw upon anger and resentment to do that, though. I like it.
 
I used to get angry when people insulted my intelligence with lies, etc. Time has made me get used to it, but every now and then I just can't deal with a lie. Anger? Nope! Now I feel insulted and taken advantage of.
 
Growing up in my family, expression of anger was not allowed.
Disobedience, or the assumption of it, had serious repercussions.
Even now, I have great difficulty managing this emotion in a healthy way.
Sometimes I just feel like screaming till my voice is gone.
But I don't. I cry instead. While this was also undesirable, it was more acceptable.
 
I usually just bottle it up and then try to work out my feelings when I'm alone. Usually, I get a lot of time to myself. I snap sometimes but it is never anything ugly.

My dad has major anger issues so I have learned what not to do in certain situations. He's also kind of a social child too so that pry accounts for something. The best thing about this for me is that it taught me to teach myself to just mellow out.

On the contrary, many things make me mad. In fact, almost everything. I get pretty intense when talking about politics or religion. People can make me mad. What they say. What they do to other people. Pisses me off just thinking about it. So, I internalize the anger and compress it until I can vent it off in some way such as music (playing or listening).

Usually louder music lets me take my mind off of something and then slower, more complex stuff chills me out.

EDIT: The thing that pisses me off most is when someone older/more experienced than myself says that their opinion is correct because I'm too young to understand.
 
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Anger has always been pretty close to me. Not in a tempermental, childish way. But more like pushing against barriers; indignant and infuriated at boundaries all around me - telling me I can't do something or am not allowed to do something when I know that's bullshit.

Sometimes I think it's sick, but I get off on the resistance. I like it when life tries to puff it's chest and stand in my way cause I get to grit my teeth and kick it in the throat. Half the time I get my ass kicked but the other half I win and that's sweet. I have to draw upon anger and resentment to do that, though. I like it.

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I don't get angry, ever.
If I do, I just go quiet. Angerly quiet.

Honestly, I love being angry. It's so freeing. I always care about how I come across, but if I'm angry it's like taking a braveness pill or something. I don't know. And I feel like I'm in control of everyone else's mood. Like, I have a nack for making the whole room feel like shit when I'm mad. I guess my angerness vibe is so strong eventhough I NEVER yell or do anything of that sort. I'll give an abrupt answer to questions or avoid eye contact, and I guess that alone is so out of my personality that people can tell something is up.

Also, anger = sadness + frustration.
I do get sad but I guess I don't really get frustrated much. I'm too optimistic for frustration.
 
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usually i get violent. not with people but things. i hate it. makes me feel evil. like i could switch to people. just reminds me of how i grew up. i always try and change but it never worked. now i just storm off.
 
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How do you deal with anger?

Are you able to express your anger?
Or does it build up to a breaking point?
Do you face your anger?
Do you bottle it up?
Do you throw tantrums?
Do you find expressive ways to deal with it?
Do you blast angry music, loud and with repetition?
Do you break down and cry?

How do you deal with your anger?

All of the above. Try to focus on expressive ways, but throwing tantrums is my favorite..

*Folds arms, stomps feet.*
 
I understand anger very well. I usually go away, hide. Pick apart myself and my feelings and find a sense of balance. I figure the anger is about me, not others. If I can't get away at the moment, I try and just not say anything. Fe can be hard for me and I will go off if you push me when I am angry or upset. If I'm not talking, leave me alone. Surprisingly, SF types don't seem to get that.
 
All of the above. Try to focus on expressive ways, but throwing tantrums is my favorite..

*Folds arms, stomps feet.*

Lol... me too, cept It's all verbal.
 
The main neurochemical responsible for anger is dopamine, so THEY say. Some psychiatrists use diphenhydramine (benedryl) to get their dopamine level down, and sedate a bit, so that they can function, (an occasional practice only thing, just for reprieve). Then you have to look at where the anger is coming from. Eat a pure diet, get regular exercise (I go for rediculously long walks in a less public area, in case I have to ball my eyes out,) then when your chemistry is regulated from a physical perspective, you rip the core of that anger out of your chest and give it a good, long, hard stare, right in the eyes, until you beat it to a pulp. You HAVE to look it dead on, and eliminate what supports it.
 
I have to vent to someone close to me that understands. Thats how I begin to sort through what I'm angry about. I usually am so upset or angry that I repeat myself and speak forcefully and I tend to be irritable and unable to focus on anything else until I have dealt with it.

The only way I have ever found anger to dissolve is to do at least one thing within my power about what is making me angry. Its the helplessness over something that really cuts me to my core and rots me. If there is truly nothing I can do, I need to physically express it. Sex, working out, throwing something, etc.
 
I get frustrated more than angry, and it builds until I let it out as biting remarks. Or sometimes I will be passive aggressive. When I am truly angry or enraged I cry, it is embarrassing but I suppose it is better than the alternative.