[INFJ] Alcohol

zsedftghj830

zsedftghj830

Community Member
MBTI
INFJ
Enneagram
4w5
I quit drinking basically for the most part like 5 years ago and while it should have felt like a good choice, it doesn’t. I quit for health reasons because alcohol is obviously bad for you but with quitting alcohol, my social life has dried up too. I’m a fun drunk, I like myself when I’m buzzed, and others like me when I’m drinking. When I’m drunk I’m still fun, but my filter becomes 100% broken so not ideal, lol. How do you cope with being sober?
Maybe I shouldn’t give it up? I miss being the ENFP version of myself… I miss feeling comfortable in my skin… how do you reach the point of being comfortable being authentically you?

Also, I love using cannabis however it seems to make me even more stuck in my head which is definitely no bueno

Can anyone else relate?
 
I am that... but tend to be evolutionary drunk... after a full beer; horny drunk. after two; sorrowful drunk. after three; shitfaced.
hard liquor is weird. after first shot or swig; tipsy. after second; tipsy with some erotic thoughts. After three; sad horny... (it's best to give me two at this point or a fourth shortly after...) four; horny. five; slurring of speech drunk. six; "What movie can we watch?" seven; fun. eight; shitfaced... nine; hangover while still drunk. i only go as far as one beer and two shots at most... Also combining the two sorta has an accumilated feeling. though instead of asking for a film... it becomes a puking spree, it's intensity is kinda dependent on how much beer i drank.

I quit drinking mostly about a decade ago... i will occasionally drink. I am a light weight.

Cannabis... well, not much is required to get me high... but it takes a lot for me to be feel blitzed and funny.
A bowl is fine, two bowls are awesome. three bowls and i request we listen to music. bowls 4-20 (for cliche' over the toppedness.) i slowly dive deeper into the laughing pits of the world. The more smoked... the more likely that i would laugh hysterically at obvious times when i shouldn't laugh. (this is dependent on the strain too.)

I tend to be a solitary smoker as even after the first few hits i require some music be played. (and not that high of volume unless it is wilst driving.) I go all quiet to the point that only thing you hear from me is a very concerning (for the first time or two) coughing spree when i take too big of a hit... :D but those coughing sprees are crazy intense.

Really, i tend to have more fun playing video games, card games, or watching a film... as i am sober and can talk with out stopping midsentence due to the factors of it making perfect sense in my mind and realizing that i could have accidently started speaking some random language.

while Sober i can mingle. :D
 
@lostinthisworld
Hello. It sounds like you should seek out sources to help you recalibrate without alcohol. Also, try finding an interest that helps you make friends, or get together with some of the same friends, for different reasons.

I don't drink. I see it all differently. There are definitely people who are more extroverted and entertaining to be around but they're that way whether drunk or sober. I don't think people are more interesting or entertaining when drunk, even if a drink or two takes the edge off for them. If I like you, I like awkward and quiet you as much as, maybe more than, dancing on the table you. There are different stages of drunkness, too, and I may think you're entertaining for a while, but after that things get complicated.

It isn't as entertaining as people think. People who know their limits are the same whether drinking or sober. People who don't know their limits go through many stages of drunk, from passionate soliloquy where I just nod along for an hour, to all kinds of sloppy antics that may be entertaining but often include undesirable side-effects (breaking things, getting hurt, cops, fights) to being an actual menace, or even being scary and verbally or physically abusive before they black out. Plus, the stage where drunk people become 200lb toddlers and I have to take care of them because they can't walk or they wet their pants is not charming.

Whenever you're reaching for a coping mechanism you're not facing the work you need to do on yourself and the growth you need. This is true for everyone because we all have an addiction, whether that addiction is harmful or not, legal or not.
 
lostinthisworld said:
I quit drinking basically for the most part like 5 years ago and while it should have felt like a good choice, it doesn’t. I quit for health reasons because alcohol is obviously bad for you but with quitting alcohol, my social life has dried up too. I’m a fun drunk, I like myself when I’m buzzed, and others like me when I’m drinking. When I’m drunk I’m still fun, but my filter becomes 100% broken so not ideal, lol. How do you cope with being sober?
Maybe I shouldn’t give it up? I miss being the ENFP version of myself… I miss feeling comfortable in my skin… how do you reach the point of being comfortable being authentically you?

Also, I love using cannabis however it seems to make me even more stuck in my head which is definitely no bueno

Can anyone else relate?
Click to expand...


It takes a while. Drinking slows it down to a sluggish pace. Weed slows you down even further into an interdimensional slower pace.

You have to 100% comfortable in yourself for the latter to be even remotely useful. (Looking into yourself, finding the issues or shit parts, throwing them out, etc)

The fastest way I see it is force feed yourself with useless interactions with people. So much that you hate it, and I mean do it sober.

As soon as you realize you're better alone (not to be alone, but to sort out your shit) you'll understand what you like about being social (an ENFP version of yourself)

Once you know what you like about it, you can subtract drinking to figure out what INFJ part you like about being with people (probably being funny)

Now, you're not dependent on alcohol or weed to be effective, and when it does come along, you can use it to multiply your fun side so that when you do return to

the shut-in INFJ, you can reflect on those good times, take even more evidence from that experience, and improve even more.

Gotta research about yourself, before you yourself can know what you need to work on, or simply put, to know what you like.

Cheers,
 
Living and socializing as a sober twenty or thirty something is freaking hard. You have to seek out and participate in a Sober Community, hanging around peers who club, drink and take recreational drugs while not doing the drinking or drugs puts you in the position of being an outsider or even a lurker. When I was sober the first time in my twenties it only lasted a year before I realized that my sex life had dried up. I did not seek a sober community then, and there really was not one that was not filled with folks that had serious substance abuse problems.
I went sober again a couple of years ago, for spiritual and familial reasons. It was easy (same as in my twenties). But now I have a very stable and supporting social life.
 
What a sad situation that people feel obligated to drug themselves in order to be granted access to a social life.

I would love to see alcohol banned, out of sheer curiosity for what would happen.
 
Anomalous said:
What a sad situation that people feel obligated to drug themselves in order to be granted access to a social life.

I would love to see alcohol banned, out of sheer curiosity for what would happen.
Click to expand...
Rebellion. Also, 'People of Wal-mart' wouldn't be as entertaining.

In all seriousness, one only needs look back to look forward. Prohibition wasn't that long ago.

Edited to add:
Yes, it is sad that people self-medicate, but they've been doing it long before alcohol was accessible. They will continue to choose what they want/think they need, regardless. Mandating how they do this is not the government's business, in my opinion (as long as they are not harming others or acting in ways which hinder the 'rights' of the rest of society).
 
Anomalous said:
What a sad situation that people feel obligated to drug themselves in order to be granted access to a social life.

I would love to see alcohol banned, out of sheer curiosity for what would happen.
Click to expand...

I just literally don’t talk unless I’m boozed up. I wish I could do it without alcohol
 
ESC2367 said:
A bowl is fine, two bowls are awesome. three bowls and i request we listen to music. bowls 4-20 (for cliche' over the toppedness.) i slowly dive deeper into the laughing pits of the world. The more smoked... the more likely that i would laugh hysterically at obvious times when i shouldn't laugh.
Click to expand...

UR LIKE THE TULKAS OF WEED
 
lostinthisworld said:
I just literally don’t talk unless I’m boozed up. I wish I could do it without alcohol
Click to expand...
I'm sorry that you deal with this. I think some here have offered good options for you in possible steps to get out of it. I hope you can find a way to be yourself and express yourself without alcohol. You deserve for people to know the true you without alcohol as a mask.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top