Your Parents (and Their Types) | Page 5 | INFJ Forum

Your Parents (and Their Types)

Discussion in 'Psychology and MBTI' started by Hostarius, Mar 3, 2019.

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  1. philostam

    philostam Community Member

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    Your relationship with mom looks really great! What happened with your dad, if I may ask (sorry if you already shared this elsewhere)?

    I think feeler parents are generally better, I wish I had them.

    TJ parents with Fi family values are also good in their own way, but not always the best for emotional support, Except if their Fi is very developed ofc, like it seems with you and in a lot of INTJs.

    FP parents can be a bit overprotective (especially IFP), while TP parents can be too loose and un-involved. This is probably the worst type of parent.

    Just some stereotypes ofc. I think I will be a good parent because my Fe is really integrated and I have a good INFJ partner. But most TPs aren't like that,
     
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  2. Daustus

    Daustus Meatbot

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    Never has 8 word more accurately described my relationship with my dad.
     
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  3. philostam

    philostam Community Member

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    Yes, I have an ISTP mom, so I know. Also ESTP uncle. Both terrible parents, if you ask me.
     
  4. Asa

    Asa Resident palindrome

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    I wouldn't say 'worst type of parent'. My INTP father was looser and less involved than my ESFJ mother (whether that was type-related or because he was the father and, therefore, taking the traditional fatherly role of the time period) but my mother was by far the worse parent because she didn't understand me and just wanted me to fit in and be what people are supposed to be no matter the cost. My father offered literature, philosophy, creativity, deep thought....

    My mother was a caregiver by nature, worked at a hospital and worked as a daycare provider for a while. She excelled at this. As a parent it was, "Do things this way. There are no other choices. Fitting in is survival!" She said the meaning of her life was to be a mother, though. Don't get it wrong, though, I miss her like crazy.
     
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  5. philostam

    philostam Community Member

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    Yes, of course. I think NTPs are usually better parents than STPs, because they are more talkative, curious, engaging etc. Also, usually more nuanced with feeling and more self aware. Well, at least I know I am compared to my mom and uncle.

    Sounds like your dad was great, and mom too, in her own way. It sounds like they balanced each other well and you got both love and care from your mom, but also understanding and deep thought from your dad.

    I hope me and my INFJ gf will do the same for our kids in the future. In fact, I am sure we will. :grinning:
     
  6. Asa

    Asa Resident palindrome

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    Being an Intuitive in a Sensor household seems like a great challenge.
    From observation, Sensors seem to be focused on: You need to change to do things this way. Intuitives are more focused on: I don't fit in, please accept me.
    Maybe the exception here is ISFPs, who tend to be a group full of unique people.

    <3 I hope so, too! Sounds like a plan for you both!

    I am lucky. I had good parents, a good family, and a good childhood. There were definitely some issues with my mom, like the fact that her plan for me was exclusively to marry well (not to a good person, but to a person with money and social clout) and be "taken care of" and she actively squashed all of my goals and interests. The end result is that I struggle with careers, but I'm excellent at being married and being a "good wife", and I went down a path that I perceived as my only choice and it was, honestly, the wrong path for me. From her point of view, marrying well and having babies was what women were supposed to do and I needed to go along with it to survive. Ironically, if I'd followed one of the paths that was most "right for me" that she rejected I'd likely have ended up exactly where she wanted me to be. My older cousin, whom I admired and aspired to be like, followed that path and married quite well.

    My mom did approve of my husband, and i'm happy he and I are together. I also have a good life now, but that path I didn't get to follow would have been better for me (on a personal level.)
     
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    #86 Asa, Dec 5, 2019
    Last edited: Dec 5, 2019
  7. philostam

    philostam Community Member

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    While on the topic of STP parents, I would recommend movie Loveless to everyone. It's truly a chilling movie.

     
  8. slant

    slant Fairly Tragic

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    My mother's an infp, my father an infj, my only sibling an enfp.
     
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  9. Ren

    Ren Pin's android

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    No room for sensors in the Slant family :grin:
     
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  10. slant

    slant Fairly Tragic

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    It's unfortunate because it's made me REALLY unable to relate to and cope with sensor personality types.

    My parental grandmother is INTJ and grandfather INTP

    my maternal grandmother is INFP

    So it was a strange upbringing
     
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  11. Ren

    Ren Pin's android

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    Wow. I wonder what the odds are of having only intuitives among your parents/grandparents. Probably pretty low.
     
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  12. Aneirin

    Aneirin AKA, David
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    father was an ESTP. . at least that is my best guess. . mom.INFJ. .without a doubt. it was a difficult house to navigate, so I spent most of my time in my room, or out of the house all together.
     
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  13. Serval

    Serval Newbie

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    I think my father is either an isfp or an infp, i don't really know why though, i made him make the test but showed infj, i am not very sure about that test anyway.
    My mother is either an isfj or an istj. She is very neat and strict about cleanliness and order.
    My sibling is an intp.
     
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  14. ClevelandINTP

    ClevelandINTP Well-known member

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    I've always been curious about my mom's personality, and after spending a good amount of time during the holidays around her, I am 100% certain she has Te in her lower-half of the stack, so a likely ISFP

    I know it could just be me, but inferior Te is royally fucking annoying if it's unregulated
     
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  15. MoonFlier

    MoonFlier Permanent Fixture

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    I'm sorry... I loved having an INTJ dad.

    I have to wonder what a normal ESTP dad is like as a parent. We've all seen DJT but he's a narcissist sociopath. (My ex was much the same.)
     
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  16. Odyne

    Odyne Organic

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    Father: INTP
    Mother: ESFJ
    Odyne: INTJ
    Sister: INFP
    Husband: ESTJ
    Son: L.O.V.E

    : )
     
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  17. OP
    Hostarius

    Hostarius Saudade Retard

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    My mum is ESFJ, too, and my dad was probably INTJ. Didn't know you identified as everyone's favourite internet edgelords, either. Hmm... another score in that ESFJ+INTx = INTJ box.
     
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  18. Korg

    Korg Banging on the walls

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    Mother: ISFJ
    Father: ISTJ
    Sister: ISFJ

    Me: I don't know. Bird swears I'm an ENTJ, but I can't accept the 'E'. I find the enneagram to be a lot more relatable.


    I find SJ's really, really difficult to be around.
     
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  19. OP
    Hostarius

    Hostarius Saudade Retard

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    This is what we have so far:
    2020-02-06 (2).png

    Obviously what sticks out is the INTJ father, ESFJ mother. This is curious to me because one of my close friends (I have 4 in that category) is an ESFJ woman, and there's always been a strange magnetism between us - I'm not sure why we are friends, but we are. I had to swerve a kiss from her on one occasion when she was blackout drunk, and there's a lot of comfortable chemistry between us. Interesting.
     
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  20. ZeroCool

    ZeroCool Three

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    This is what I think they are:

    Father: ENTJ
    Mother: ENFJ
    Sister: INTJ (only sibling)
    I am INFJ

    I am very close to my mother because of the Ni-Fe. My sister is close to my father (Ni-Te); and I don't think it has anything to do with the Freudian explanation... ha ha. My father and I had seriously disagreements on lot of things, and to some extent our egos are still clashing. Cognitive Wars!!

    I speak emotions, and my father and my sister are expecting tangible explanations. What is holding this family together is NJ, that's all I can say. My parents have no idea they are handling introverts... ha ha

    Maybe, it's the freshness of her dominant extraverted feeling that is creating attraction. One of my friends is INFP with Fi, and he used to be amazed everytime his INFJ girlfriend expressed her emotions so freely.
     
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