The limits of an angel | INFJ Forum

The limits of an angel


The Romantic Scientist
Feb 8, 2009
So what exactly will make you explode? What's your achilles heel? What situations will make a peaceful little angel like us go into the great pits of hell(metaphorically speaking lol)? What makes people say to you "you are being sensitive"? Should they know better not to touch that topic?
  • Telling me all my problems are my own fault
  • saying that women are creatures that men should control
  • making jokes about miscarrages (yet I still make "dead baby" jokes :/ )
  • any sort of verbal attack/threat directed at my friends or family
  • calling me a "little bitch"
IDK... stuff like that. I might not be INFJ, but I still don't let my anger out unless it's needed (the stuff I just posted is "needed" to me)
  • The Blame Game.
  • Malice, and deliberate aim to harm.
  • Emotional manipulation.
  • Senseless Hate.
To be honest, I rarely EVER "explode." I only really remember that happening a few times in my life, the last time being years ago. That was over family problems though, which afterword I promised I'd never get involved in again. =\

People outside of my family have a difficult time making me mad. Some people actually ask me if I ever get mad or will try to get me mad, to no avail of course. Though on the inside, I sometimes do get mad. Mostly that's from other people making assumptions (about anyone, including me) or stereotyping others. I think stereotyping is just as bad as prejudice, as it almost always leads to it.
I get REALLY irritable when someone gets "in my space." I don't mean physical space -- I mean when I'm trying to focus, and continually get distracted. I need to find my center >8(

When I go out of my way for people and am not appreciated. Or, even worse, when people accuse me of being a pushover or doormat. I am neither of those; I choose to go out of my way for people, and I don't like it when those close to me are that a problem?

Being called stupid, irrational, ignorant, etc. when they don't even give me a chance to actually put out what I know -- and with some things, I know a lot.
Picking on the underdog or screwing with people I love. I will ruthlessly cut anyone down if you screw with any of my friends or loved ones. You can say anything in the world to me, but if you hurt anyone I love.... be prepared to see a different side of me. I won't stop until I'm sure you're humiliated in front of the people you respect the most. But that's rare.
(I like the bulleted approach.)

  • Willful ignorance
  • Dehumanizing
  • Sexism, racism, homophobia, etc. etc. (all those 'isms'.)
  • Aggression and dominance
I don't snap when these things happen. I do usually utter something scathing in the frustrated and misguided spirit of constructive criticism... But it's pointless.. Because the only way to change anyone's mind is if they are open to learning. And in my encounters with die-hard fanatics and bigots, I've never met anyone who actually cared to hear what I or someone like minded had to say.

I've realized I don't have the energy to argue with someone if they aren't open to seeing another side. So if someone is being an ignorant bastard, If I'm able to, I remove myself from their presence. I always make my disapproval clear.

Whenever I see someone being dehumanized I don't go on some sort of vigilante rampage against their aggressor or oppressor. But I try to offer support to the person being harmed and help them find ways to become empowered to leave the situation or solve it.

I don't fight; I don't have the stomach for it. But I won't be pushed around either. To be honest, when someone I'm close to pushes my limits I cry furious tears in secret and then calm the hell down enough to confront them in a totally cool and rational manner to solve the dispute.
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I am very protective of people in general. When I see someone being oppressed, bullied or abused I won't hesitate to stand up for them.

BUT If my loved ones or friends are being hurt then a side of me comes out that is rarely seen. I lose all fear and my only goal is to eliminate the problem. I will physically and verbally wound and humiliate the person who hurt my friend. Whatever discomfort they caused to my friend/loved one they will be feeling it too but 100 times worse.

When someone is threatening me or intimidating me I try to end it as peacefully as I can and walk away. If I have to, I use only as much physical force as necessary (and nothing more) to stop the person.
Aggression, generally. I'm not too good at handling negative criticism either. I can tell when the intention behind a comment is good natured, and I'll take that as thankfully as I can, but when I sense someone is just being nasty for the pleasure of putting me (or anyone else) down, it rapidly eats at my composure and I find it difficult (although not impossible)to remain objective. I know of that weakness though, so I can prepare for it. Either by avoiding exposure to the people who trigger my anger, or having something (positive and disarming) ready to say back.
  • Willful Ignorance in argument
  • Patriotism
  • Insulting my Intelligence, Willpower
  • Imposing on others
I never really get angry, but these things will tick me off, and usually cause me to confront the person about it later.

  • Taking my things or using my stuff without asking to.
  • People doing embaressing things around me after I tell them to stop.
  • People causing me to be late.
  • Telling me what I believe is wrong.
  • Telling me what to do without explaining why.
  • Excessive control just for the sake of.
Oh yes, thanks IS, I forgot one...

  • People trying to take control over a project I am in charge of.
- Insulting my intelligence, belittling my feelings, or calling me crazy
- Hurting (or not respecting) the people I care about
- Talking behind others backs
- Telling me I will change my mind or how I feel about things that are important to me
Hell, that sort of thing makes me leave everything.

If I'm supposed to be cooking dinner, it's my choice what we cook, how it's cooked, and what is used to cook it.
If I'm supposed to be doing the job, it's my choice what order I do things in and what areas I use to do them.
If I'm supposed to be doing the dishes, it's my choice to use the dishwasher or not.
If I'm supposed to be organising the camping trip, it's my choice where we go, and what sort of camp we set up.

Otherwise THEY can do it and take the responsibility for themself.
-others telling me who i am with an air of righteousness (i don't even know who i am with such definiteness, how is it they do?)

-intrusion of person space, particularly psychologically

-when others become impractically clingy or needy (sometimes i truly feel bad that i cannot tolerate this because usually the person does not mean harm...i just am not comfortable with it at all)

-sometimes...when others beat around the bush too much about something i feel has importance or urgency, especially when it is done purposefully to obscure or deceive

in regards to issues like hatred (whether it be threats, manipulation, harm, etc.) directed at me or witnessing it happening to others, i don't explode more than that i resent, avoid, or become engrossed in finding a way to dissipate it.
*passive aggressive behavior
*constant chatter
*not listening
*talking over me as if I've not spoken
Bullying the weak
False superiority
Danger to loved ones
In any situation that is physical, I get massive adrenaline rushes. Just seeing someone get put down gets to me.

Anything that violates my sense of justice really gets to me.

But to make me lose my cool, they'd have to stupid, arrogant, and aggressive towards me, I'd have to be in an irritable mood. I can't say exactly what makes me lose it because so many things do, but when people I respect are purposefully inconsiderate of me, that tends to do it.