Romantic Attraction Turn Offs
- Thread starter lightning23
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Yeah, I mean it's fine if they do it into the grass or in a bush... Basically I like women, heck, people with some class.
people that are mean, whinge, complain, gossip, paranoid, suspicious, jealous, negative, distrustful, rude, discourteous, lazy, close minded, uncreative, unhealthy, insecure, not confident, arrogant, prudish, too detail orientated, ungrateful, repressed, uptight, too cautious, uncaring and unwilling to take responsibility for their own lives and how they effect others
and forgot to add- clingy and attention seeking
and forgot to add- clingy and attention seeking
Overconfidence is a major turn off... Unfortunately I'm usually super judgemental about people who wear expensive, ostentatious branding, because I feel that they must care way too much about their appearance to want to spend that amount of money on something as superficial as clothes. This is an instinctive judgement, which I work hard on toning down because it's a bit irrational...
Still, a guy who looks like he's trying too hard is a massive turn off... I would much prefer someone who is calmly confident and is happy with their own style.
Still, a guy who looks like he's trying too hard is a massive turn off... I would much prefer someone who is calmly confident and is happy with their own style.
I never would have thought that you would have so many turn-offs.
You've always seemed so patient to me.
Quite agree. I always wonder why is it someone has to strut their stuff so much just to be confident and respected. Calmly confident is a good way to put it. I shouldn't need to be hit over the head with someone's ego or confidence to know they are confident. That's why know it alls are a turn off. Yeah, I want to be with someone who is smart, but not someone who is ridiculously full of it. It isn't necessary. You can be confident in who you are and what you know without hitting everyone over the head with it.
Edit: And it makes me wonder if people with that much arrogance are covering up for other insecurities or compensating for something.
Emotional neediness is a huge turn off for me. Other things: jealousy, clinginess, overly religious...(I have nothing against a person being religious but I was never into extreme religious types...buzz kill), boring, bad manners...that's all that comes to mind. They are the major ones for me.
A huge one for me is when someone consistently makes very judgmental or overly critical comments about other people who they don't even know. Particularly if it is a criticism of someones appearance or choice of clothing. If you don't like the clothes, fine, criticize the clothes themselves, but leave the persons character out of it, thanks. You don't know them, so don't act as if you do.
Illogical reasoning. Demanding. Paranoid. Delusional. Distrustful. Close-minded. Inconsiderate. Bad manners. Too critical/judgmental. Bullies. Just lays there when having sex. Too co-dependent. (I like some, but not total interdependence). Too independent. Dishonesty. Not genuine.
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Thank you. I can be endlessly patient if people are willing to explore and grow. But im also a perfectionist, with myself and the people closest to me. I dont really care about what someone has done in the past or sometimes even what their current life is like, i just care about what their intentions are and what their potential is, and their willingness to be an awesome person. When they are unwilling to do this than thats fine, but i no longer want to actively engage with them or having them as an influential force in my life. I am extremely picky with the people i choose to be friends with/have relationships with. I want to be happy and have fun, i try to avoid people that will fuck that up for me and gravitate towards people that want the same thing.
One of my number 1 turn offs is someone who holds back or withholds affection or fakes disinterest to keep their partner interested. It's a game I don't like playing. If you're interested, show it, albeit respectfully. You don't need to be pushy but this whole thing about appearing unavailable to get someone to stay interested is a little tired.
From a guy INFJ viewpoint:
Well, I'd agree with you on all levels, to a certain extent. For example: I've been raised in such a way that you are expected to compliment, and compliment abundantly. To not do so would be rude. Now, I don't expect anyoen to compliment my looks that much, or really compliment me at all; but there's something about having someone you love tell you "Hey, that looks quite handsom on you" or "You're wonderful, and I will never let you go" that just stirs me.
And with the humor, I'm sorry, but I will almost always try to go out of my way to make a laugh in a stressful or awkward situation. It's just simply who I am. Not at the expense of someone else, of course, but you get what I mean.
Personally, my turn-offs are up-front sexual advances. And general rudeness in just about any way. I really want someone who wants more in life than just me and her, and who wouldn't mind supporting and being supported by me.
That's the mark of someone who is very, very insecure. Chances are, he/she isn't a very honest person to begin with because they're afraid to just be themselves and take the risks necessary to progress in a relationship.
I must admit, I used to get hooked into game-playing because I enjoyed the challenge of pitting my wits against the other person. As intriguing as it was, though, it never cultivated healthy relationships and the game-playing never died down for a minute.