Mirror Theory: Disliking of people...

Projection?

 

There are a handful of people that I can not / could not stand at all. I later realised it was because I saw parts of myself in them that I did not like at all. The interesting thing is once I saw that, I consciencly went out of my way to try to fix it. I also noticed a pattern I have a strong distaste for people who are alot like I used to be several years ago.

 

Sounds like you might want to work on not being so judgmental of people. Do you know everything there is to know about the people who offend you? What good does it do to walk around being offended by everyone? Why don't you get to know them and find the good things in them to encourage if their negative traits bother you so much?

As far as having anything in common with them. Of course you do! That's what being human is all about. A dose of humility should do the trick.

 

TBQH, I am going to have to say I have felt this towards people throughout a majority of my life (even thus far).

Exemplarity: I sat with the same individual at a table for weeks
during lunch and I had never spoken to them because I had
perceived them as 'too conforming' and selfish - until they asked
me for my name and we started socializing. Recently, they have
told me I am one of their best friends. My reaction was mixed - I was disgusted and flattered.


I believe this has something to do with my ego or I - being too judgemental. I never outwardly display arrogance - but at times I do believe I am better than everyone else :-x ... INFJs see themselves as individualists and value individualism.

 

I usually like people, but then at some point a person who I thought was nice will cross a line and I can see that they have every intention of exploiting me. When someone takes my "niceness" and sees it as an opportunity to exploit me I feel threatened and a bit like an animal backed into a corner. It's when they wait until they devise that I'm generous enough to exploit and then they make their move. When they surprise me with that I tend to rehearse all the things i should have said to them (with a little extra snarkiness) when they crossed the line and feel intensely frustrated. I then withdraw and wish I didn't have to interact with any people. This happened recently.