mimicking body language and intonation? | INFJ Forum

mimicking body language and intonation?

TinyBubbles

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Oct 27, 2009
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does anyone else do this? i find myself mimicking the way a person moves and even speaks, after i've been talking to them for a while. if they have an accent, i sometimes (slightly) take on that accent too! it's surprising to notice it, because i'm not doing it consciously, it just happens o_O
 
When I'm overseas for more than a few weeks people will not believe me when I tell them I'm Australian.
 
Yeah, i sometimes reflect the persona someone is presenting, mostly to blend in.
 
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I don't know how much the 'picking up an accent' thing will apply to me. I live in the South and learned to speak with a noticeable Southern accent. I purposefully dropped it in my early teens and obviously had to mimic accents of people from other places to learn not to talk the way I did before. Now my accent(s) is/are sort of transient. I tend to slip up a bit and regain my Southern accent to a degree when I am around other people with Southern accents and/or feel relaxed. I don't know if it is to fit in or because it's simply less of an effort for me to speak that way.

I don't really think any of the other areas apply to me, but I don't know. Body language is highly subconscious.
 
Yes! To all of the mentioned! I also pick up people's laughs subconsciously if I like them, accents, little sayings. Often realise that I have copied body language subconsciously. Drives me mad! I hope people don't notice it, or it's not too overt.
 
Absolutely.

It comes from too much empathy.
An occupational hazard for an INFJ.
 
If I do, then I am not aware of it. To some extent I find myself imitating body language. They have done studies about influential people and the adaptation of their body language and sometimes dialectic as well.
 
does anyone else do this? i find myself mimicking the way a person moves and even speaks, after i've been talking to them for a while. if they have an accent, i sometimes (slightly) take on that accent too! it's surprising to notice it, because i'm not doing it consciously, it just happens o_O
I do tend to do this, but I find that I influence others more than they influence me. I can make people use the terms and words I use and even downright copy my body language right back at me. I once got a whole forum to start "giving out forum muffins" to the point where the word muffin was edited out by the admins using a filter.
Example, I make perfectly T men start saying phrases like "SO cute", "silly goose" and "naughty!".
 
yeah, all the time... I even keep expressions sometimes. The other day I noticed that I shrug my shoulders the same way an old friend of mine used to. I would agree that it has to do with empathy.
 
does anyone else do this? i find myself mimicking the way a person moves and even speaks, after i've been talking to them for a while. if they have an accent, i sometimes (slightly) take on that accent too! it's surprising to notice it, because i'm not doing it consciously, it just happens o_O

I don't know how much the 'picking up an accent' thing will apply to me. I live in the South and learned to speak with a noticeable Southern accent. I purposefully dropped it in my early teens and obviously had to mimic accents of people from other places to learn not to talk the way I did before. Now my accent(s) is/are sort of transient. I tend to slip up a bit and regain my Southern accent to a degree when I am around other people with Southern accents and/or feel relaxed. I don't know if it is to fit in or because it's simply less of an effort for me to speak that way.

I don't really think any of the other areas apply to me, but I don't know. Body language is highly subconscious.

Ah, I feel your pain! I have a transient accent as well. Southern people know I'm not from the south but northern people tend to think that I am. Anyways, sorry to burst people's magical bubbles but reciprocal gesticulation occurs in everyone. Typically it is talked about in non-verbal dating tip sites but it occurs everywhere (and basically in everyone). You basically find a sense of comfort and unity in a person by using inside comments and jokes (Like a clique/group thing) and by reciprocating someone's posture.
 
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Everybody does this subconsciously. Though some are skilled enough communicators to do this consciously and get away with it.

It's a form of persuasion. You're persuading someone to trust you when you do this.
 
ACD is right. I have to admit that I am consciously aware of this and sometimes do this on purpose.
 
Everybody does this subconsciously. Though some are skilled enough communicators to do this consciously and get away with it.

It's a form of persuasion. You're persuading someone to trust you when you do this.

Yup its a little weird when you watch it happen.lol

I wish I was that skilled it would be nice.lol
 
i agree with under skies, body language is highly subconcious, that's why it's so accurate to read, if you know how to interpret it.

as far as voice goes, no. I might try to blend in by communicating (speech usually) in a different structure or style that is more similar to their's (e.g. relaxed, formal, staccato, etc.)
 
Everybody does this subconsciously. Though some are skilled enough communicators to do this consciously and get away with it.

It's a form of persuasion. You're persuading someone to trust you when you do this.

Yep, it's called rapport in some cirlces. If you match the other persons tone, tempo and volume of voice, the tilt of their head, their posture, breathing rate and any sensory words (visual, auditory, feelings etc) they use then you kind of become like them or enter a similar state to them

People like poeple who are like them so this goes a long way to creating a trusting atmosphere.

I wouldn't recommend doing all these things at once as you will probably get caught but you can play around with it.

You will probably do this automatically with people you get on with really well.

Don't try and stop it if you notice yourself doing it as this is a completely normal process and one of the main ingredients to becoming a good communicator.

If you want to know more about this:
http://www.renewal.ca/nlp15.htm
 
Yep, it's called rapport in some cirlces. If you match the other persons tone, tempo and volume of voice, the tilt of their head, their posture, breathing rate and any sensory words (visual, auditory, feelings etc) they use then you kind of become like them or enter a similar state to them

People like poeple who are like them so this goes a long way to creating a trusting atmosphere.

I wouldn't recommend doing all these things at once as you will probably get caught but you can play around with it.

You will probably do this automatically with people you get on with really well.

Don't try and stop it if you notice yourself doing it as this is a completely normal process and one of the main ingredients to becoming a good communicator.

If you want to know more about this:
http://www.renewal.ca/nlp15.htm

Agree.
 
I love adapting cool stuff other people do to my repertoire. heh heh.....

I mostly borrow cynical short phrases and pieces of others' laughs...
 
Body language I try to pick up on since I'm not cool enough on my own to have good body language and hand gestures.

I used to do the mimicking accents thing. I tend to avoid it now because I prefer my own. Plus my roommate has a friend who has a horrible accent. It's not a native one either because she is mixing two things together that just sound like a cacophony of screeching. She tries to do a fake Paula Dean-type southern accent on top of her forced and fake sounding Brooklyn accent (Shes from Iowa). Paired with a high pitched voice it is just unbearable to listen to. It made me realize some things don't need to be mixed and forcing a certain way of talking when it just isn't who you are doesn't always end well.

So I don't do accents anymore. I'll still match tempos and tones though because to me that's a dynamic that belongs to the conversation, not a set standard for a person. I couldn't ever be somebody that speaks with intensity about everything all the time with everyone. I admire that in a person from time to time. Just definitely isn't me.
 
Oh yeah, I should have mentioned. Stay well clear of accents. It doesn't work like the other things do. The other person may even think you are mocking them.

You can practice this whilst sat in a public place like a restaurant, the bus station or wherever. It works better if you aren't looking straight at them. you can use your peripheral vision. At some point you may feel yourself "lock" onto the other person and you won't have to try and match them anymore. It will come naturally.

Don't be surprised the the person turns and smiles at you at this point. even if they were facing away from you before. This is one of the stranger things I have come across.

I have even done this with someones walk whilst in our shopping centre. There were lots of people between us and the guy was way in front (you don't want to get caught and labelled a stalker). As soon as I felt the lock on he turned and looked directly at me and smiled (I like to think that afterwards he was confused about why he did that)

Mwahaha