Male Behavior Regarding Women.

[Sloe Djinn]

Idk I can respect what @Vigilance is saying. While it's not how I choose to engage in relationships, we all have our preferences. Some people just want to f***, and that's just what's up. From a purely biological viewpoint, it's not really that extraordinary, and it makes sense that it isn't affected by social conventions that many of us may respect by tradition, such as rock on the finger. It's apparent that most of us in the thread place greater value on monogamy and a deeper bond. It's just that though. A preference. I don't think there's anything necessarily broken about, or wrong with, people who just want sex. Trouble happens when priorities change (or differ off the bat) and there is a lack of communication.

 

[Vigilance]

I don't mind being in a monogamous relationship at all. To get to being in a monogamous relationship, you must date the person, first, in order to get to know them better. However, when I am single, I prefer to date multiple women until something official happens, i.e., being in a monogamous relationship. Usually, I welcome sex on the first date, while actively dating, and believe it is a good sign of attraction as well as something potentially happening between us down the road (a monogamous relationship forming) if we both develop feelings; this requires a second date and so on if the feelings are there. So, yes, sometimes a 'fling' will happen because people will have sex on the first date or second date,and the feelings are just not there afterwards when you go home to sit and think about the matter. This usually happens when both parties don't end up calling each other after the first or second date.

I understand that when people date that they only focus on being with that 'one' person, trying to build attraction and all of this nonsense when attraction honestly happens naturally. The concept of focusing just on one person, personally, does not work for me. What if we don't develop feelings/are not a 'match,' and we just end up fucking.... without any romantic feelings? So, I like to keep my options open and date a lot.

 

[Littlelissa]

I don't think there's anything necessarily broken about, or wrong with, people who just want sex. Trouble happens when priorities change (or differ off the bat) and there is a lack of communication.

This is essential and also why promiscuous men often have a bad reputation of being deceitful 'players'. I want to know what the other person is about and weather I want to have any part of it, and there can definitely be misunderstandings if the other party has a different idea about relationships and dating - and the communication has been anything less than honest and clear.

The concept of focusing just on one person, personally, does not work for me. What if we don't develop feelings/are not a 'match,' and we just end up fucking.... without any romantic feelings? So, I like to keep my options open and date a lot.

The other question is, how can men say they are 'a player' in so many words with out coming across as arrogant, narcissists,- well don't brag about all the sex your having with multiple women to your date. (some men do this because they have fragile egos and like to play games to feel in control)- but at the same time be honest and straight about it (as soon as possible without coming across as a jerk).

@Vigilance I also think 'cute' sensitive looking guys have to be doubly careful to conduct themselves well, and as honestly as possible, because women can get the wrong impression that angelic looking guys, are well, angels. It can take some of us some time to grow out of starry eyed fantasies, and have a more realistic idea of what is really going on in some of these situations.

 

[Happy Phantom]

This is essential and also why promiscuous men often have a bad reputation of being deceitful 'players'. I want to know what the other person is about and weather I want to have any part of it, and there can definitely be misunderstandings if the other party has a different idea about relationships and dating - and the communication has been anything less than honest and clear.



The other question is, how can men say they are 'a player' in so many words with out coming across as arrogant, narcissists,- well don't brag about all the sex your having with multiple women to your date. (some men do this because they have fragile egos and like to play games to feel in control)- but at the same time be honest and straight about it (as soon as possible without coming across as a jerk).

They cannot. @Vigilance is very transparent, as are other men like him. I can spot them as soon as they open their mouths, or message me.

 

[Sloe Djinn]

Lmao well yes because they're probably like "Hey wanna bang?"

 

[Vigilance]

Communication is key, as you mention. Bragging is stupid as well.

@LittleLissa are you trying to say that I'm angelic looking, cute, and sensitive looking as well? Lolol

 

[Sloe Djinn]

Careful he just wants to sex u!!!!!

 

[acd]

Careful he just wants to sex u!!!!!

Like this:

 

[Littlelissa]

Communication is key, as you mention. Bragging is stupid as well.

@LittleLissa are you trying to say that I'm angelic looking, cute, and sensitive looking as well? Lolol

Well you are quite cute, but don't let it go to your head, lolololo!

On a more serious note promiscuous men who also happen to be sensitive (are not total jerks) can be a bit confusing to some women, especially us that are a bit more nieve and inexperienced.

 

[Vigilance]

 

[Littlelissa]

cute

promiscuous

sensitive

How do I know that??

Because I'm an INFJ...and as you already know I'm too old for you. lol!

(Anyway, I was just posting to say try and be decent and nice while your being promiscuous with all those young women)!

 

[5r6jhd]

I don't have a problem with sex , but I do find guys who are seeing multiple women unattractive. I mean, it's not something that's totally terrible but all I can see is a giant neon chlamydia sign over their head and it turns me off.

 

[Vigilance]

I don't have a problem with sex , but I do find guys who are seeing multiple women unattractive. I mean, it's not something that's totally terrible but all I can see is a giant neon chlamydia sign over their head and it turns me off.

I agree. I also laughed a bit when reading this. . I also think it would have to do with the person's overall sexuality, hygiene, and protection level, I.e., how many partners he/she has in a lifetime, if he/she is constantly fooling around with any and every individual, the individual or his/her partner is not very clean and/or sanitary, no protection, etc.

 

[5r6jhd]

I agree. I also laughed a bit when reading this. . I also think it would have to do with the person's overall sexuality, hygiene, and protection level, I.e., how many partners he/she has in a lifetime, if he/she is constantly fooling around with any and every individual, the individual or his/her partner is not very clean and/or sanitary, no protection, etc.

Totally agree. I mean if a guy is fucking multiple women and the multiple women know and are ok with this, there is no issue. Personally for me, I just find I don't like risking STDs. I know too many ER nurses and know just how many fucktards are out there with HIV fucking everything that moves not caring a damn for the welfare of others. It's scarily more than you'd liketo think.

 

[Littlelissa]

I don't have a problem with sex , but I do find guys who are seeing multiple women unattractive. I mean, it's not something that's totally terrible but all I can see is a giant neon chlamydia sign over their head and it turns me off.

Absolutely! It hardly makes a gal feel very special either. I think the absolute worst thing is when a guy thinks their a stud or something for boasting about how many women they're seeing and they think you'll be impressed by that. Like yes, please add me to your list, baby! Haha.

 

[Sloe Djinn]

You're losing 'em. Quick, post another copyrighted pic of a half-naked lady swooning!

 

[Vigilance]

Totally agree. I mean if a guy is fucking multiple women and the multiple women know and are ok with this, there is no issue. Personally for me, I just find I don't like risking STDs. I know too many ER nurses and know just how many fucktards are out there with HIV fucking everything that moves not caring a damn for the welfare of others. It's scarily more than you'd liketo think.

These must be the jerks @LittleLissa was referring to.

 

[Vigilance]

You're losing 'em. Quick, post another copyrighted pic of a half-naked lady swooning!

Lololol oh no! I'm loosing them.

 

[5r6jhd]

These must be the jerks @LittleLissa was referring to.

Yes, but my point is you can never tell who the jerks are. Jerks don't always walk up all jerklike and transparent.

 

[acd]

Yes, but my point is you can never tell who the jerks are. Jerks don't always walk up all jerklike and transparent.

I kinda think jerks always have a tell. But a lot of the time, we see what we want in people. I know that has been true for me. Looking back, I can see where I chose to overlook my initial gut instinct in some situations.