Is this typically INFJ... or is it just me? | Page 2 | INFJ Forum

Is this typically INFJ... or is it just me?

Wha? Haha, I'm very uneducated when it comes to these things... If you could explain further (dumb it down) I'd really appreciate it.
And I'm okay with being whichever four letter formation, I'm just kinda curious to try to see where what is distinctively me begins and where my thought pattern/personality type ends. I'll probably post more threads like that: "Are you all this way too, or is it just me...?"

This thread explains pretty well what I am talking about: http://forums.infjs.com/showthread.php?t=14436

Please keep in mind though that this personality disorder thing is more or less a joke, and not everyone in one of these "loops" is considered to be bad or a mess of some sort.
 
It seems to be a common INFJ thing...You're not alone.

It might seems to be too soon, but it might be good to find out about Enneagram. It focuses on your 'why's, rather than MBTI's 'how's.

Also, +1 to Indigo's posts.
 
This thread explains pretty well what I am talking about: http://forums.infjs.com/showthread.php?t=14436

Please keep in mind though that this personality disorder thing is more or less a joke, and not everyone in one of these "loops" is considered to be bad or a mess of some sort.

Haha, schizoid disorder... I looked it up and I fit all the categories :-O. One part of it is being "cold towards everyone", and I didn't think I fit that at first, but now that I think about it maybe it's true... I have so much emotional investment in people going in, then I get to know about them and I lose all interest in them, lose all respect. Then I just turn cold.

Oh, also - I took the ennagram test. Although maybe I didn't choose the proper site? I'm not sure about the test off of this site, the questions where kinda weird and hard for me to answer. And I got a 34% on perfectionism.... pppfffftttt.



Enneagram Test Results

The Enneagram is a personality system which divides the entire human personality into nine behavioral tendencies, this is your score on each...
Type 1 Perfectionism||||||||||34%
Type 2 Helpfulness||||||||||||||||||||90%
Type 3 Image Focus||||||||||||||||66%
Type 4 Hypersensitivity||||||||||||||||||||82%
Type 5 Detachment||||||||||||||||||74%
Type 6 Anxiety||||||22%
Type 7 Adventurousness||||||||||||||||62%
Type 8 Aggressiveness||||||||||||||54%
Type 9 Calmness||||||||||||||58%​

typescoretype behavior motivation222 I must be helpful and caring to be happy.420 I must be true to my emotions to be happy.518 I must be knowledgable and independent to be happy.316 I must be impressive and attractive to be happy.715 I must be high and entertained to be happy.914 I must maintian a peaceful and easygoing environment to be happy.813 I must be strong and in control to be happy.18 I must be perfect and good to be happy.65 I must be secure and safe to be happy.

Your main type is Type 2
Your variant is self pres
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First off, I've read that INFJ's tend to be afraid of conflict and bad with money. That is not true for me. I will intentionally seek conflict and I make enemies really easily. And I'm super frugal.

Okay, on to the real topic of this thread: I am extremely perfectionist in my behaviour. I get very restless and anxious due to this. It's to a point where I am always trying to change myself and my life for the better, sometimes going to extreme lengths. One example: I've been in Chicago for 6 months now. I kinda like it, but I miss nyc so now I have anxiety over not being in the "right" city, a.k.a. the most ideal city. Nevermind the fact that I don't know anyone in nyc and that I could not afford to live there... So I try to imagine how I could possibly move to nyc and make it work, and at the same time trying to maintain life here in Chicago. Doing this, I do not appreciate what I have in the present.... all it makes me do is fret about the future. Any advice on how to handle this better?
I also obsess over my apparence. If I have no make-up on and if my hair is not fixed my whole personality changes. I do not want to be seen, I just try to avoid everyone and my mood goes down. It happens because I'm so aware that people treat you different based on how you look, and I don't wanna have to deal with that. If that makes sense...

There are quite a few people from chicago on these boards.. Do you have a ny accent?

Anyway, this is the exact reason why I make-up out lawed. There's way too many girls who feel insecure without it on. But I would be lying to you if I didn't do the same. I like to wear tight shirts that show off my muscles, and like going out in style. And of course, the occasinal make-up from time to time. But if were up to me clothes and make up would be out lawed. Except in the winter, it's freezing here in the midwest right now.
 
1. Perfectionist? Yes
2. Argumentative? Hell yes
3. Concerned about appearance? Of course.
Am I an INFJ? Damn right.

My advice:
1. This constant striving business is unavoidable really for INFJ types. Best to find a way to channel it into something meaningful - a vocation, perhaps - so that it is put to good use. I burn my perfection out in one or two areas that are specifically meaningful to me. The rest of me then gets an easier ride.

2. I am argumentative as hell but conflict leaves me raw. It's the classic cutting off my nose to spite my face. The INFJ believes they are bestowed with better insight than most other types, and that, added to a strong sense of justice and truth, can create a more argumentative person in the INFJ who is perhaps more socially developed than other shrinking violet INFJ types. I have been working to tone this down for some time and am much better at it now. I've learned to let things slide, to temper my argumentative side with better people skills, using questioning rather than lecturing. Still a work in progress. (Ever failed?? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better.)

3. I like to look good and don't like to leave the house when I don't. I'd adhere to your own internal sense of what matters here rather than listening to anybody else. There are people for whom appearance doesn't matter (in my experience, some Introverted Sensing and Feeling types). But the INFJ's Extraverted Feeling makes us acutely aware of how we are perceived in the outside world. I know one INFJ female who dresses badly - like she fell backwards into a wardrobe. I know another INFJ male who is somewhat well known in the country where I live and he is cool as hell. There is nothing shallow in wanting to look good. And only adolescents believe that you have to look like shit to be taken seriously. Human beings are hardwired to appreciate beauty. In my experience, looking good means you will be taken MORE seriously. The evidence for this is in the working world all around you.

Hope some of that helps.
 
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