"Intimidating women . . ." | INFJ Forum

"Intimidating women . . ."

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by Gaze, Aug 11, 2010.

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  1. Gaze

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    I saw this topic on another forum and was curious what women and men on the forum think about this.


    What makes a woman intimidating?


    Some say "intimidating" women are a turn off because she's a threat to male masculinity.


    Is this still true today?


    So, what are your thoughts on the intimidating female?
     
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  2. Wyote

    Wyote Xenoi
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    Anybody projecting an aura of intimidation is just scared.
     
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  3. TheLastMohican

    TheLastMohican Captain Obvious
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    Some people are intimidating unintentionally.
     
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  4. Wyote

    Wyote Xenoi
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    Perhaps that is you feeling false intimidation due to your own fears =P
     
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  5. TheLastMohican

    TheLastMohican Captain Obvious
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    Hmmm...? What does it have to do with me?
     
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  6. Odyne

    Odyne ===========
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    Hmm, I think a woman can be seen as intimidating when she is assertive and have the intellect to challenge a man's ideas and views.

    To some men, that is exactly what they are looking for, and they don't feel threatened by it, but excited. So it's not always a turn off.

    My close friend explicitly said that he likes "intimidating" women. He finds them interesting and challenging. Funny thing is he then complains about how the women he surrounds himself with are "controlling".

    So does "intimidating" correlate with "controlling" as well?
     
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  7. Blind Bandit

    Blind Bandit Blind Man Being Lead to Nowhere
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    ^Not really I think a lot of people are controlling. But thats a whole other issue.
     
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  8. NeverAmI

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    I think the majority of intimidation is not gender specific, unless the person being intimidated thinks in a particularly gender specific way.

    Men that are intimidated by a woman's intellect solely on the basis that they are a smart woman seem to be rather sexist in the first place. I think that is more of a problem with someone having a problem with a woman having her own opinions, and not simply being submissive.

    Some people just generally don't like to be told what to think, or to have a viewpoint shoved in their face, but that isn't gender specific.

    For me, extremely extroverted women (actually not gender specific) and women that are extremely proficient in body language and analyzing my own are very intimidating.

    I don't know if the following is intimidating, but it is certainly annoying as hell: women who think they know what is on my mind based on my body language and limited interaction that really don't know me at all. That probably explains why I find women that are constantly analyzing body language intimidating.

    Ultimately, I think an intelligent woman is a beautiful thing, and I highly value it.
     
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  9. TheLastMohican

    TheLastMohican Captain Obvious
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    Yes, but not necessarily because those women seen as intimidating are trying to be controlling. Instead, there is another group that drags the mean in the other direction: a lot of women will actually hide their intellect and appear to be pushovers in order to attract men. So when an honest, fairly normal woman shows up, a lot of men will see her as something odd and intimidating.

    Outside of this context, of course, plenty of people try to be intimidating as a means of establishing control, and vice versa.
     
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  10. OP
    Gaze

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    I think this is the issue. I don't mind being intimidated by someone if the qualities are admirable/confidence, etc. But when someone dismisses someone because you're not "in their league" so to speak, then that's the kind of person who i just think is full of it. Especially, those who think they're better than you because you're a "weakling" to them. A woman actually used the word "weakling" on the forum to describe women who are not as intimidating as they are. I was thinking, "seriously?" Is your confidence really based on whether someone is beneath you? That's not intimidation, that's just arrogance.
     
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    #10 Gaze, Aug 11, 2010
    Last edited: Aug 11, 2010
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  11. the

    the Si master race.
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    Women I generally associate with the word intimidating are usually some combination of bossy, mean, cold, tall or all of the above.
     
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  12. ~jet

    ~jet Director of Space Exploration

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    I've spent bits of time in the past on sites like match.com, and for some reason I get matched up against women who primarily have post-graduate degrees (masters, phds, etc.) This ~is~ somewhat (if not logically) intimidating. Its not that I don't appreciate/gravitate to smart women (I do) but since my own higher-eduacation paperwork is a bit 'slimmer' and I'm largely self-taught in my career, I imagine I'd end up feeling inadequate (or otherwise might feel that she might think so, anyways.)

    I'd say it is irrational to think so, except everyone is irrational to some degree and you can kind of count on most to focus on things like that, however little it matters.
     
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    #12 ~jet, Aug 11, 2010
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  13. enfp can be shy

    enfp can be shy people vs the bad people?
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    o.o I don't have particular gender definitions for intimidating... If they attack me too much, especially indirectly (so I have no way of responding really), I feel quite -_-, and just try to move on / avoid them.

    People who are particularly unfair / cruel to others in my presence, also are quite intimidating for me, and among the very few that could get me truly angry. Or at least used to; I've worked on that and by now appreciate the fact that some people have reasons to be cruel to others - so I approach them as decisive as I can, in order to stop them, but not with actual anger towards them either.
     
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    #13 enfp can be shy, Aug 11, 2010
    Last edited: Aug 11, 2010
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  14. DoveAlexa

    DoveAlexa Chaz's Lovey Bunny
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    Yeah, this is what I thought too. Especailly the cold part. Like the steely stare of DOOM. //shudders
    I don't really find intellect intimidating in either sex unless I am actually in direct competition with someone, like for a seat in a class or a position at work etc.
     
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  15. OP
    Gaze

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    Although i don't think many intimidating women fit this description - some are just self confident and it simply comes across as intimidating, i'd have to agree when someone focuses on developing a reputation of being intimidating, i tend to associate them with the negative qualities you mention.
     
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    #15 Gaze, Aug 11, 2010
    Last edited: Aug 11, 2010
  16. acd

    acd Well-known member

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    Corndogman has issues with women.
     
  17. NeverAmI

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    Sometimes I think intimidation says a lot more about the intimidated party than the intimidator. Be it not knowing enough about that person's personality, just generally on guard, etc.

    I have met some people that intimidated the hell out of me, but months later I think to myself "They are soooo harmless!" They had a direct personality, and it had unexpectedly hit me off guard.
     
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  18. TheLastMohican

    TheLastMohican Captain Obvious
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    ...and I take it you have issues with corndogman?
     
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  19. acd

    acd Well-known member

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    You are very perceptive.
     
  20. the

    the Si master race.
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    She is all butthurt that I made her fall in love w a man and now all her feministic ideals are down the toilet as she does his laundry. In fact that happened to both my man-hating friends.

    My issues with women compliment the issues you have with men. Rebuttal.
     
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    #20 the, Aug 11, 2010
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