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Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by InsightFireNightJail, Oct 18, 2010.

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  1. InsightFireNightJail

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    This seems like a totally reasonable thing to address.

    Other than the people who have an INFJ in their life and are looking for answers, why are there so many non-INFJs as regular posting members here? Especially perplexing is when one of the threads of the form "Does anybody else experience X, Y, or Z..." is started by an INFJ with the almost certain intent of trying to get other INFJs to relate, and then non-INFJs answer it like it was an open survey for any and everybody. Maybe some times it is. But my guess is most times it is not. Isn't there a forum for every type? Don't get me wrong, one of my best friends is an INTJ. When I found out my type, I got him take the test and then voila, it explained why I always felt like we were similar yet fundamentally different. I longer try relate to him in the ways we are less alike and it actually has increased our connection. I do seek his alternative perspective sometimes and I guess that is helpful on this forum when non-INFJs offer counterpoint.

    When I found this forum I thought, finally after a lifetime of having to get advice and relation from people who weren't like me, I can finally get some true empathy. You can extrapolate this post in all sorts of directions so feel free to. This may sound grumpy but I think it is more me noticing something that I haven't seen anyone else bring up and me just wanting some consensus.
     
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  2. Saru Inc

    Saru Inc Schrödinger's Pussy
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    Because INFJs can be very one sided. We provide a balance in other lives, but we need a balance in ours. Also, many here came as INFJs but later changed, and vice versa.

    Now, let me be frank, *but not rude,* why would you think their advice is not as valid? Just because someone is an ESFJ doesn't mean they can't relate at some level, hell, I'm sure an ESTP might be able to relate/help you out. To ask for INFJ only advice, is to ask how to get to heaven with a tower.


    Again, I don't aim to be offensive, I aim to be to the point. This forum is full of some of the most amazing, quirky, awesome people I've honestly ever met. was I surprised by the huge amount of non iNFJs? Sure. But still, I welcome them with amazingly non physical open arms, as this forum would not be the same without them.
    :m154:
     
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  3. invisible

    On Holiday

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    the INFJs on this site are all very different from one another. if such a thing is possible there's enough of us here that you'll find what you need, but i'm not sure that we can provide each other with that kind of deep validation anyway, it may have to come from within. the best thing about this board is that you can be your INFJ you without judgment.
     
    #3 invisible, Oct 18, 2010
    Last edited: Oct 18, 2010
  4. Majesty

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    Aww. I don't feel loved :pout:

    I agree with Urtehnoes.
     
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  5. Kavalan

    Kavalan Has risen

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    Hi, I'm Kavalan I thought I was an INTJ spent some time over at there forum. It didn't jive with me, I know IndigoSensor IRL so I wandered over here and and later found out I fit the ISTJ type better... So... I should leave?

    This forum is an amalgam of different people trying to figure out who they are. If they found out they aren't INFJ they get the heave ho?

    This place is about understanding and getting one perspective(and a very broad one at that) will cause imbalance. My thoughts and two cents are valid and I try to chip in when they are valid.

    Chill out, if you have questions you want answered they will be. Don't worry, we non-INFJs don't bite... too hard... ;)
     
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  6. Peppermint

    Peppermint Well-known member

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    You can't contain an exclusive population in a community, unless the administration is tying to mimic some kind of a totalitarian regime. Internet is an open avenue, people pass by a place, they like it, stick around. It's a prominent thing on every other MBTI forum. INTPcentral and the INTJ forum stand out as having a significant population of different types. Then, there are also mistypes, and they are very frequent, so it's questionable whether you're going to encounter the population you want from the start.

    Each forum has an atmosphere, that you could say suits the type in the header even if there are other types around. It's like a little culture, and those who participate usually adapt. The ones who for whatever reason do not fit the culture, are usually expelled either by their inactivity or the administrative action. Those who don't identify as INFJ are still a minority here, so I don't think a fear of a major overthrow would be very reasonable.

    In other words, this is still an INFJ place and it should be able to meet your needs for empathy; it's done so for many others from what I can tell.
     
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  7. Blind Bandit

    Blind Bandit Blind Man Being Lead to Nowhere
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    A couple different reasons. Because people mistyped and decided to stay. Some types (mostly ENTP's) come here trolling for INFJ ass. As sad as that sounds I've seen several ENTPs do it over and over again. As for the rest curiosity and learning more about the INFJ type. And yes it can get rather annoying when you need advice from INFJs, and you get drama or the wrong advice. I think our biggest weakness is this site wasn't being set up by an NF. And the continued ENTX way the site is run. I think it contributes to many of our core problems. For example all the drama thats allowed to let ride.

    But realistically your not going to find a forum with just INFJs. Its just not possible to keep a forum small and yet active.
     
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    #7 Blind Bandit, Oct 18, 2010
    Last edited: Oct 18, 2010
  8. Gaze

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    You're assuming that INFJs are the only ones capable of empathy - untrue. And you believe that everyone can be reduced to their type - not good. We are individuals, and regardless of type, we all have a capacity for empathy, except for psychopaths of course. In any case, the point is, suggesting that only INFJs have the ability to give empathy or respond to a question with a high level or understanding is incorrect. Each type has interesting perspectives, and without any of the perspectives, it wouldn't be the community that it is. We learn from each other.
     
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    #8 Gaze, Oct 18, 2010
    Last edited: Oct 18, 2010
  9. bamf

    bamf Is Watching You
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    I can only speak for myself, but I came here thinking I was an INFJ for a long time, and I still consider it, but I don't think that means I should not be here, or that my opinions do not count. Anyone could slap INFJ into their MBTI box, does that make them qualified to answer questions?
     
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  10. middle1

    middle1 Hellur

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    Ew so I'm like at risk of changing by posting on here? J/K

    I enjoy the different personalites and views that everyone brings to the table. I love INTJ's and the INFP's are starting to grow on me too :m085:
     
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  11. Majesty

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    yes it does :D
     
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  12. bamf

    bamf Is Watching You
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    Your opinion is invalid as well! Ha!
     
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  13. rawr

    rawr ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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    agreed. just because someone is not a certain personality, or does not have a certain label, why should they be unwelcome here? Diversity is quite healthy, if not only for the variety of perspectives. And just because someone may not be an INFJ doesn't mean they don't know what one is like. If anything, it provides a certain balance anyway, one that i greatly appreciate.
     
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  14. Majesty

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    Not anymore ;)
     
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  15. myself

    myself Permanent Fixture

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    I love all types. Nothing wrong with diversity...

    But this forum does have an increasing amount of noise.

    We are all in different stages of development, so I'd expect this to happen as the forum population grows.

    This space just feels a little crowded for the moment.

    It might be annoying, but I want to encourage you to just wait it out.

    Either this place will develop into something we like, or another community will develop.

    I feel like a big jerk for expressing this view... but there it is.
     
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  16. myself

    myself Permanent Fixture

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    ouch...

    got negative rep within a few seconds for that post

    yes, i feel misunderstood
     
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  17. NaeturVindur

    NaeturVindur Cuddlemaster
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    didn't read a good portion of the thread, but it seems that the question of why all the non-INFJs are here has been answered. As to why they always seem to answer the threads not directed at them: 1) no one likes being left out, and so they don;t let themselves get left out. Also, they provide valuable insight. The question of "do other INFJ's experience this?" is a good question, but determining if its an INFJ trait, an N trait, or a universal trait can only be know with some outside-INFJ perspectives.
     
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  18. Bird

    Bird Happy Go Lucky

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    Just because one is not an INFJ does not
    mean that one cannot empathize with you.

    It is always best to have different perspectives.
    Reading non-INFJ responses helps to broaden
    the mental picture and see things in more than
    just one direction.
     
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  19. TinyBubbles

    TinyBubbles anarchist

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    True enough but the OP has a point, this is an INFJ forum, intended primarily to allow INFJs to communicate with others of their own type. You could get a range of perspectives on any forum, or in real life.

    Perhaps there should be a section in which only INFJs can respond? *shrugs*
     
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  20. Bird

    Bird Happy Go Lucky

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    hate crimes, lol
     
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