INFJ Loneliness

Roses In The Vineyard said:
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🤣😆 omg this is me. So relatable.
 
Hyacinth said:
Ugh this is the worst, I so don’t miss those years. Here’s what I learned people don’t think like us so I no longer say how I’m feeling because it’s not safe to open up to anyone outside of this forum. I was in hindsight stupidly opened up to people since it’s my way of connecting with people and did so on regular social media as a way of trying to get healing for what was done to my child from a community that tried to get her to commit suicide and film it as she was doing so. They chewed me up and spat me out. Moral of the story is that other types could honestly care less what they do to us. Take the lessons that each of us go through on here and do the opposite as an INFJ because our hard lessons can come with the upper advantage of learning from our mistakes. I keep myself closed up now and meet people where they are at instead of where I’m at. Saves me a lot of grief in the long run. A lot of people are very much unsympathetic and will blame you for “being too soft” so protect your heart at all costs. It’s your greatest feature and deserves your safeguard. All love comes with risks but only open up as far as they do so that you won’t need therapy later 🤣😆 cause lord I’ve had to spend a lot of money to get to where I’m at today but it was an investment in myself so that I could overcome all of my challenges in life.
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Every time someone says to me that high school was “the best years” of their life, I want to fall off my chair laughing because high school was definitely not sunshines and rainbows, at least not for me. It’s kinda sad we have to meet them at their level and not ours. I think we should just let our waves keep roaring and drown them out because they’re not worth our time and attention. Like, make small talk every now and then but make sure that our thoughts operate at a different wavelength so that we can craft battle plans and creative exit strategies while they babble about the weather lol.
 
AngelineIsTyping said:
Every time someone says to me that high school was “the best years” of their life, I want to fall off my chair laughing because high school was definitely not sunshines and rainbows, at least not for me. It’s kinda sad we have to meet them at their level and not ours. I think we should just let our waves keep roaring and drown them out because they’re not worth our time and attention. Like, make small talk every now and then but make sure that our thoughts operate at a different wavelength so that we can craft battle plans and creative exit strategies while they babble about the weather lol.
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Right?!? Definitely not the best years. I mean you can meet them at your level but prepare for some backlash because that’s all I’ve gotten. When you meet them at their level they’re not as quick to tear you down from feeling threatened by you. In a perfect world, sure we could ask them to rise up to our level but it doesn’t happen. Each personality type has something to contribute and they excel in areas that we don’t so truth be told we all need each other but not everyone deserves the full you. Reserve that for those worthy of your time and attention. Our capabilities are rare and deserves to be carefully crafted and in the wrong hands it won’t be.
 
QuickTwist said:
I had a girl shatter my heart into a million different pieces, and it took me years to recover. The next year after she broke up with me, I developed psychosis. It was... bad.
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Oof hope you’re okay now. I had a couple friends with mental illnesses and while I know that some don’t heal entirely, I still hope that you’re in a better place—I sort of have a vague idea of how terrible it can feel, especially when it comes to heartbreak. Sticks and stones may break your bones, but broken hearts take longest to heal.

I’ve recently gotten over a rejection and now I am weary of real-life boys’ intentions when they approach me. I squirm when their gazes linger on me for too long or when they name-drop me multiple times and act like we’re super close (by telling the group I texted them first while conveniently dropping the fact that THEY initiated 90% of our conversations, and by sharing how I sent them one of my novels but not how they practically begged for it), and I squirm even more when they smirk at my “smile, blush, look away” reaction, knowing that the group is watching. And don’t even get me started with “pretty” or “good figure”—a part of me is secretly flattered but another part is uncomfortable with being objectified. I’ve learned that there are boys whose egos are fed through how nervous I appear in front of them, who do the chasing but reverse it in group settings to make you look desperate.

Anyway, relationships are hard and sometimes people don’t make sense. I can’t think of any other way to describe it. Just want you to know that I’ve also been rejected, led on and manipulated by the opposite gender, so you’re not alone in this regard.
 
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