Fed up with modern dating/“quick sex” | Page 3 | INFJ Forum

Fed up with modern dating/“quick sex”

ClevelandINTP said:
Not always--there are countries that will be underpopulated at some point soon. Humans are wired to survive, and loving themselves is a form of survival which thereby promotes the survival of the species. Therefore, they are having babies for the greater good; they just might not of thought of it the way you articulated yet. It is possible existential questions arise within someone after things happen
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Well yes, i've heard of those countries. In the bigger picture though as in the totality of the human population, surely the extinction of several races isn't indicative of the total extinction of our specie. Interestingly enough, life expectancies are high in those countries too.
 
MINFJToothFairy said:
Well yes, i've heard of those countries. In the bigger picture though as in the totality of the human population, surely the extinction of several races isn't indicative of the total extinction of our specie. Interestingly enough, life expectancies are high in those countries too.
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Talk about arguing in circles
 
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ClevelandINTP said:
Sex releases oxytocin and builds attachment regardless. I have never met someone who has never formed any sort of emotional attachment in the process of sex. Even dudes that in are the 100s of partners will still have attachments formed at the macro and or micro level. Macro could also be applied to just the process, thrill of the hunt, novelty or the acts themselves
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Precisely. Which is why people who do it at the capacity of rabbits are either addicted to oxytocin or somehow suffering a dire physiological lack of it. Sex is not the only way to increase levels of oxytocin in the body. Sex is increasing oxytocins at the very risky expense of emotional and mental stability. If sex is not just for procreation or a hormone releasing activity, and if we are to believe that it connects us to people: why do we need to connect so shallowly with so many?
 
HollyBeeTheENFP said:
I’m losing hope in people and in modern dating. I despise seeing so so many people engaging in a system that I find entirely trivial and meaningless— meeting up, having sex right away, attempting to frantically throw emotions in, seeing other people, it lasting for two months and the cycle starting all over again. Am I the only one who wants to barf at this? Am I the only one actually deep around here?

What I want is to build up intimacy with someone. Slowly, but deeply. Isn’t that what’s real? Isn’t that what matters?!

I crave the deep emotional connection SO MUCH and find it so rare. I don’t care if I have to wait YEARS for that to happen, the depth that comes that way is astronomical and incomparable to anything else. Is it not that emotional depth that brings physical connection as well?
I have done that before, of spending years of time investing in someone slowly but surely , and as that connection built it later on brought the physical side. That is SO MUCH more worth it than engaging in random sexual acts with random people .. why do people do this? Why do people start dating someone random and just have sex right away? You DONT KNOW THEM. You haven’t given them your soul. I’d much rather wait until I find someone who I want to give my SOUL to. Gosh, the depth behind that. That’s what means something. Emotionally, physically, everything. Everything else is insubstantial and pointless.
Does anyone else work this way? Are there any others who see a depth of intimacy this way?
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I see it exactly as you have described it.. real intimacy, real physical entwining is a thing only achieved when the bond and love are deep and authentic.. The electrical current that is created this way is nothing short of explosive.. It's spiritual. No *hook-up* can even get close.
 
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Misty said:
I see it exactly as you have described it.. real intimacy, real physical entwining is a thing only achieved when the bond and love are deep and authentic.. The electrical current that is created this way is nothing short of explosive.. It's spiritual. No *hook-up* can even get close.
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Oh, yeah, those are awesome. I have never experienced that blast from one sexual encounter with someone. I mean you might have a good lay or two in there the first few times, but it generally takes awhile to build up to crescendo sex
 
Misty said:
I see it exactly as you have described it.. real intimacy, real physical entwining is a thing only achieved when the bond and love are deep and authentic.. The electrical current that is created this way is nothing short of explosive.. It's spiritual. No *hook-up* can even get close.
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I mean, I had this threesome once that was like a hook-up how it happened. It was pretty magical
 
MINFJToothFairy said:
Precisely. Which is why people who do it at the capacity of rabbits are either addicted to oxytocin or somehow suffering a dire physiological lack of it. Sex is not the only way to increase levels of oxytocin in the body. Sex is increasing oxytocins at the very risky expense of emotional and mental stability. If sex is not just for procreation or a hormone releasing activity, and if we are to believe that it connects us to people: why do we need to connect so shallowly with so many?
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MINFJToothFairy said:
Seriously. Is there a venue for this? Are there tickets? How come God hasn't me the invites? Hehe kidding aside, falling in love can be few and so far in between for many of us. Don't be depressed if it is, though. You are fine as a human being regardless.
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The last thing i remember dear @MINFJToothFairy was turning to God and asking the same question.
Mine was phrased like this : "Hey Big guy, don't you think it's about time to meet her?" "I am 33 already!"
And i met her the very next day!
The details were so mind blowing i could not escape the vertex of falling.
But the fall was to my new self.

This is where i realized how blasphemous we can be when we decide what we need and ask in irony of how come we haven't received it yet.
i can elaborate forever so i thank God for the existence of video editing!
Here's a teaser
 
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ClevelandINTP said:
How do you extrapolate sex is possibly just sex for me from what I've wrote?
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key word: perhaps. I poked precisely to get this reaction.
Scissorhands said:
The last thing i remember dear @MINFJToothFairy was turning to God and asking the same question.
Mine was phrased like this : "Hey Big guy, don't you think it's about time to meet her?" "I am 33 already!"
And i met her the very next day!
The details were so mind blowing i could not escape the vertex of falling.
But the fall was to my new self.

This is where i realized how blasphemous we can be when we decide what we need and ask in irony of how come we haven't received it yet.
i can elaborate forever so i thank God for the existence of video editing!
Here's a teaser
Click to expand...


Oh! Respect!
 
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