Ever wonder if you or a loved one has avoidant personality disorder? | INFJ Forum

Ever wonder if you or a loved one has avoidant personality disorder?

Pixie In Repose

Pixie In Repose

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Mar 27, 2010
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I wonder sometimes when I see the criteria about a good friend of mine. Although I think most people are really on a continuum and its not actually black or white, you have it, you don't. I've also wondered whether my friend might be depressed.
Here are the diagnostic criteria:

The World Health Organization's ICD-10 lists avoidant personality disorder as (F60.6) Anxious (avoidant) personality disorder.[2]
It is characterized by at least 3 of the following:
  1. persistent and pervasive feelings of tension and apprehension;
  2. belief that one is socially inept, personally unappealing, or inferior to others;
  3. excessive preoccupation with being criticized or rejected in social situations;
  4. unwillingness to become involved with people unless certain of being liked;
  5. restrictions in lifestyle because of need to have physical security;
  6. avoidance of social or occupational activities that involve significant interpersonal contact because of fear of criticism, disapproval, or rejection.
Associated features may include hypersensitivity to rejection and criticism.
 
It is characterized by at least 3 of the following:

[*]persistent and pervasive feelings of tension and apprehension;

I am always in a state of tension and find it hard to relax, I am always worrying.

[*]belief that one is socially inept, personally unappealing, or inferior to others;

I have a huge inferiority complex and at times feel worthless, I tend to avoid others because of it and just shy away.

[*]excessive preoccupation with being criticized or rejected in social situations;


Yes, though I hate to admit at times I am to worried about what others will think of me if I would show my true mask, partly because as a child I went through abuses because of it.

[*]unwillingness to become involved with people unless certain of being liked;

Yes, if I sense that I do not fit in correctly or that I am simply just being ignored, used or uncared for, I will put on a mask like nothing is wrong but afterwards avoid that person at all causes.

[*]restrictions in lifestyle because of need to have physical security;

[*]avoidance of social or occupational activities that involve significant interpersonal contact because of fear of criticism, disapproval, or rejection.
Associated features may include hypersensitivity to rejection and criticism.


Pretty much all describes me well, I am quite hypersensitive and at times have a hard time taking criticism. I fear rejection and at times I feel like I am not good enough and I am just a burden.
 
Pixie In Repose said:
I wonder sometimes when I see the criteria about a good friend of mine. Although I think most people are really on a continuum and its not actually black or white, you have it, you don't. I've also wondered whether my friend might be depressed.
Here are the diagnostic criteria:

The World Health Organization's ICD-10 lists avoidant personality disorder as (F60.6) Anxious (avoidant) personality disorder.[2]
It is characterized by at least 3 of the following:
  1. persistent and pervasive feelings of tension and apprehension;
  2. belief that one is socially inept, personally unappealing, or inferior to others;
  3. excessive preoccupation with being criticized or rejected in social situations;
  4. unwillingness to become involved with people unless certain of being liked;
  5. restrictions in lifestyle because of need to have physical security;
  6. avoidance of social or occupational activities that involve significant interpersonal contact because of fear of criticism, disapproval, or rejection.
Associated features may include hypersensitivity to rejection and criticism.
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Consider also that in this diagnostic criteria "It is a requirement of ICD-10 that a diagnosis of any specific personality disorder also satisfy a set of general personality disorder criteria."

The general personality disorder criteria are listed below:
General diagnostic criteria

According to ICD-10, the diagnosis of a personality disorder must satisfy the following general criteria, in addition to the specific criteria listed under the specific personality disorder under consideration:

1. There is evidence that the individual's characteristic and enduring patterns of inner experience and behaviour as a whole deviate markedly from the culturally expected and accepted range (or "norm"). Such deviation must be manifest in more than one of the following areas:
1. cognition (i.e., ways of perceiving and interpreting things, people, and events; forming attitudes and images of self and others);
2. affectivity (range, intensity, and appropriateness of emotional arousal and response);
3. control over impulses and gratification of needs;
4. manner of relating to others and of handling interpersonal situations.
2. The deviation must manifest itself pervasively as behaviour that is inflexible, maladaptive, or otherwise dysfunctional across a broad range of personal and social situations (i.e., not being limited to one specific "triggering" stimulus or situation).
3. There is personal distress, or adverse impact on the social environment, or both, clearly attributable to the behaviour referred to in criterion 2.
4. There must be evidence that the deviation is stable and of long duration, having its onset in late childhood or adolescence.
5. The deviation cannot be explained as a manifestation or consequence of other adult mental disorders, although episodic or chronic conditions from sections F00-F59 or F70-F79 of this classification may coexist with, or be superimposed upon, the deviation.
6. Organic brain disease, injury, or dysfunction must be excluded as the possible cause of the deviation. (If an organic causation is demonstrable, category F07.- should be used.)
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I think it is tricky business to enter into amateur diagnosis of self or others, so please be cautious as you engage with this idea. My sense is there may be a tendency to judge others more harshly when they are different than we are, or they exhibit characteristics that conflict with our own preferences, values, or needs.
 
A lot of the criteria for Avoidant Personality Disorder are very similar to how depression is experienced. I know because I've had it before. You feel really sensitive, very low self-esteem, and stay away from other people for fear that they will dislike you or think that you are a burden to them. I think the main difference is that depression goes along with sleep and eating problems and sometimes suicidal thoughts. RacoonLove, maybe this is depression?
 
Pixie In Repose said:
A lot of the criteria for Avoidant Personality Disorder are very similar to how depression is experienced. I know because I've had it before. You feel really sensitive, very low self-esteem, and stay away from other people for fear that they will dislike you or think that you are a burden to them. I think the main difference is that depression goes along with sleep and eating problems and sometimes suicidal thoughts. RacoonLove, maybe this is depression?
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Pretty much, I do not sleep much( average of 1-3 hours of sleep daily(. I am starting to eat a lot more. Suicidal thoughts are also quite frequent.
 
Raccoon Love said:
Pretty much, I do not sleep much( average of 1-3 hours of sleep daily(. I am starting to eat a lot more. Suicidal thoughts are also quite frequent.
Click to expand...
Hmmm, sounds more like depression. Have you been able to talk to anyone-friends or family-about this?
 
Thank you Tovlo, for the info about personality disorders. Although I am a counselor, I'm not looking to diagnose my friend since I certainly can not be objective. I'm really just curious and hoping to find more info about this disorder since it seems to be pretty rare. Its difficult when you know someone who is in a lot of emotional pain and sometimes hard to know what to do.
 
Pixie In Repose said:
Hmmm, sounds more like depression. Have you been able to talk to anyone-friends or family-about this?
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I don't get a long with my family, been hated upon my parents after they discovered my sexuality. All other relatives are distant. Do not have much friends, been pretty much a loner. Though I am recently making some connections, and have recently gotten into friendships with a few individuals, they do not feel close though.
 
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I've been diagnosed with this and it explains partly why my life is such a pain.
 
That's good that you're making connections. Sometimes its hard to talk about depression with others-I know it was hard for me-but it is helpful to talk to others who have been through it.
 
Pixie In Repose said:
Is there any treatment for this? Is it effective?
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I have no idea. I wasn't offered treatment for it. I would love to check out if there was. But I'm sure it involves some sort of cognitive therapy.
 
I've been formally diagnosed with General Anxiety Disorder. As far as avoident personality, that sounds kinda like me, but it isn't enough for me to say I have it. As tovlo said it isn't a good idea to self diagnose. That being said a "bad" INFJ could be stereotypes as a avoident personality disorder (INFP's to a degree as well).
 
Sounds a lot like me - certainly I have the symptoms, if not the condition, but isn't that the same thing really, more or less? Whether things are formalised by a professional or not, the problem is still the same. Certainly I was badly affected by these symptoms in my teens, was much better during the time I was on anti-depressants in my early 20s, but not feeling very much like I was running the show, and so when I came off the medication, the problem returned. It has been better or worse depending on the circumstances and especially the people in my life. Often it's the things I have been compelled to do, through lack of money or the threat of relationshop breakdown that have improved things. For example, I think I improved a lot after doing door-to-door canvassing for a few months, when this was the only paid work I could find. I hated the non-stop interaction and feeling of being judged by every person who opened the door, but gradually this lessened, as I came to understand that 90% of the time, my fears were totally unfounded. Anyway, it's interesting. I'll consider digging out my CBT books again. :)
 
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