Emotional needs

[Gaze]

Human Emotional Needs​

Here are some of the basic human emotional needs expressed as feelings. While all humans share these needs, each differs in the strength of the need, just as some of us need more water, more food or more sleep.

One person may need more freedom and independence, another may need more security and social connections. When a person's natural emotional needs are met, healthy behavior naturally follows. (See note below about children, adolescents and schools.)

In various degrees, each according to his or her own unique nature, we each have a natural emotional need to feel:
accepted
acknowledged
admired
appreciated
approved of
believed in
capable
challenged
clear (not confused)
competent
confident
forgiven
forgiving
free
fulfilled
heard
helped
helpful
important
in control
included
listened to
loved
needed
noticed
powerful
private
productive / useful
reassured
recognized
respected
safe / secure
supported
treated fairly
trusted
understandng
understood
valued
worthy

http://eqi.org/needs.htm​

What emotional need or needs are the most important to you? And how are you affected when they are not fulfilled?​

 

[Siamese cat]

I'll pick this:

accepted
free
private
treated fairly
challenged

I've noticed that most of this I won't get if I don't openly request it, although I do my fare share to fulfill else's emotional needs without asking. I'm always baffled why do people consider respecting others privacy to be such an optional act. Or that respecting and acknowledging someones differences should be normal, as opposed to trying to fit everyone into some stereotype and making a big fuss if that's not possible.

 

[Gaze]

Here is an interesting article on setting emotional boundaries.

http://www.hiddenhurt.co.uk/Articles/boundaries.htm

 

[Altruistic Muse]

Challenged, in control and understood are probably the most important. I feel like a lot of people think they understand me but there are very few that actually appreciate my perspective. I need to feel in control of my plans, in the short and medium term especially. I hate when people change plans on me, or throw an event at me unexpectedly. And I need to be challenged, or intellectually stimulated. I could not be with someone who I could not have abstract conversations with, and who didn't find everything interesting. In fact I've done it before and it's not been pleasing.

 

[bamf]

My list of the most important would include the following

admired
believed in
confident
forgiving
free
loved
needed
respected
trusted

 

[TinyBubbles]

I think it's easier to observe this in other people than to describe it in yourself. for eg. It's pretty obvious to see when someone needs to be appreciated, but recognizing your own need to be appreciated would have to be done through a thick cloud of mental bias.

 

[anica]

acknowledged
challenged
competent
confident
free
helpful
loved
private
respected
trusted
valued

When my need for acknowledgment, respect and feeling valued aren't met, my self-esteem drops, I feel frustrated and sometimes use less-than-effective means to try to get them met. When I'm not challenged, I quickly become bored; this unmet need also affects my confidence and competency, so all three of these are linked. Without enough privacy, I feel trapped and begin to get quite grumpy and my thinking becomes less clear. My need for freedom is always tempered by my need to be helpful and trusted, but I can live with this. Love is probably my strongest need and fortunately I am surrounded by people who love me. When I feel unloved is when I feel most smothered, oddly enough.

 

[Jasmine85]

emotional need to feel:

--- most important to me:
capable
competent
confident
understanding
private
respected
free
appreciated
in control

--- quite important to me:
helpful
accepted
acknowledged
admired
fulfilled
important
clear (not confused)
safe / secure
trusted
supported
treated fairly

--- less important to me:
needed
helped
forgiven
challenged
listened to
loved
productive / useful
heard
noticed
valued
worthy
reassured
approved of
forgiving
believed in
included
powerful
recognized
understood

 

[Shai Gar]

this thread is over 9000

 

[Siamese cat]

Here is an interesting article on setting emotional boundaries.

http://www.hiddenhurt.co.uk/Articles/boundaries.htm

Very interesting indeed, thanks for sharing.