Do's and Don'ts for having coffee with an ENFP | INFJ Forum

Do's and Don'ts for having coffee with an ENFP

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by Wyst, Oct 26, 2009.

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  1. Wyst

    Wyst Are you there?

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    Any do's or for-the-love-of-God-do not's?
     
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  2. Faye

    Faye ^_^
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    I don't know how to not offend ENFPs. Just be nice and you should be good.
     
  3. Billy

    Billy Contents Under Pressure
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    I know 2 enfps, a guy and a girl and I get along great with both of them. Just be yourself.
     
  4. Feelings

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    My little sister, 17 years old, is an ENFP, and we are very close. A co-worker who I was close with was also a female ENFP; She is 50 years old. I chatted a few ENFP's on INTJ forum as well. And of course, there's a certain 12 year old female ENFP from Singapore that random-added me on MSN and coaxed me into playing Uno and Virtual Bowling with her.

    My perspective may be different because I am an INTJ, but this is how I would characterize ENFP's: EXTREMELY easy going, VERY difficult to offend, happy, cheerful, positive, full of ideas, unconventional. I would have a lot of difficulty offending an ENFP unless I tried to, or was extremely and obviously being hurtful.

    I think that ENFP's like my depth, and my being unconventional. When an ENFP does something that doesn't fall within the bounds of social acceptability, it barely registers with me because I'm very unconventional as well. They can be very silly, and can say/do shockers if they think that you will be OK with it. They like that I am very OK with it.

    INTJ's (like INFJ's) are also seemingly infinitely interesting. I find that ENFP's generally have a lot more depth than is immediately apparent. The ones I've known are pretty intelligent. They like that we have depth.

    ENFP's also seem to be OK with me going a bit quiet on them. They WILL pull you out of your shell, and enjoy the process of doing so.

    Another thing, I tend to go along with ENFP's. Not always, obviously, but if they have an idea or they want to do something, I have a tendency to go along with it. Their enthusiasm and positivity sucks me in.

    Hope it helps. I am available for further questions, of course.
     
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    #4 Feelings, Oct 26, 2009
    Last edited: Oct 26, 2009
  5. OP
    Wyst

    Wyst Are you there?

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    Thanks, pierce. She's not really in to MBTI at all. She says she hates to be labelled in confined into any one single type.

    I wonder if she'll notice that she may have to pull me out of my shell. Do ENFPs have antennae for this type of stuff or is it only if they understand MBTI?
     
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  6. Feelings

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    Antennae. That is, assuming you've correctly read this one as an ENFP.

    If she IS ENFP, if you push a bit, she'll look into this Myers-Briggs a bit. And she won't mind you pushing a bit. It'll go like "ooook... FIINNEE..." but I guess that's only if you know her kinda well.

    You can actually be a bit more forward with ENFP's. They don't mind it all too much.
     
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    #6 Feelings, Oct 26, 2009
    Last edited: Oct 26, 2009
  7. smiffy

    smiffy Community Member

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    hello yeah just show interest ask questions, were usually very curious about everything but take each person on their own merit and character what may work on one ENFP may not work on the other, despite the way people love to generalize types.

    On a date/coffee, we like lots of chat, ask questions about the person, listen to what they say and ask them more, I love been asked questions, hypothetical what if's?

    what super power would you have you you could only choose one?

    also run with the sense of humour and make fun of us (provided its not a touchy subject remember the 'F') hope this helps
     
  8. Solongo

    Solongo Well-known member

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    Thats true. When i first went to lunch with my current boyfriend at the time (he's an ENFP), he thought I was BORING!! until I stole his fries:m052: then he fell head over heels for me. We still going strong, but they like the unusual. They are a lot more energetic, straight forward and excited by the tings that put them on the spot. But they are very curious about INFJs because we always seem mysterious and ENFP swear they can figure anyone out...haha but they don't.
     
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  9. smiffy

    smiffy Community Member

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    yep I am dating a quiet INXX cant figure out the last 2. Think a J, but the T or F is hard to tell, and the fact I cant figure her out intrigues me, i usually can figure people out within 15 minutes or at most a few hours, Im still trying to figure the new girl out
     
  10. slant

    slant Sedated slanty

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    Do talk about her troubles dating guys and how she subconciously does it to earn the never received love from her father.

    Do talk about her finishing school and if she's going to graduate or get a GED.

    Do buy her a hot chocolate when she asks for it, say you're going to order a small and then accidentally order a medium.

    Do prank phone call her boyfriend and threaten to tie him to a bed and beat him with a flagpole if he misbehaves.

    Well, at least, that's how I do it with an ENFP at coffee.
     
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  11. Solongo

    Solongo Well-known member

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    why not just send her the MBTI test?

    Interesting that you are confused about the F or T. Most people can't figure out the J or P. if she seems to know what you are feeling most of the time then maybe she is a Feeler.

    :m057:
     
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  12. Shai Gar

    Shai Gar Guest

    Send her the OkCupid test.

    One of the fun ones which have all the correct questions.
     
  13. smiffy

    smiffy Community Member

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    I mentioned it, but I wouldn't ask her to take it yet, sort of embarrassed by it, hmmm she likes to make decisions, actually theres a description on a new thread I set up! so we don't take this one over, its called class this person for me
     
  14. OP
    Wyst

    Wyst Are you there?

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    We're both taking the same counseling class this semester. I was thinking about spending some time discussing some of the assigned articles we've read, and from there going into her interest in counseling... lots of why's there, I'm sure..

    But it looks like I can't always be serious. I tend to be overly serious with people until I'm comfortable with them. Once that's the case.... you'll never escape my tendrils of irritation... they're unstoppable!!! :m144:
     
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  15. Solongo

    Solongo Well-known member

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    Same problem here. Once everyone gets to know me I am lot more fun.
     
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  16. Solongo

    Solongo Well-known member

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    I think a lot of IN somethings enjoy those tests secretly. I know I do and many others on this forum...:m057:
     
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  17. Shai Gar

    Shai Gar Guest

    send the OkCupid test, they've got heaps of fun tests, so they're great to introduce people on.

    Two of the guys I play DnD with are an ENTP (GM) and INFP (crazy sorcerer who "disappears" bodies after we're done with them.)
     
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