Does forum culture affect your behavior offline?

This forum has changed who I am quite a bit. In the sense that it has made me grow by quite a bit. I can safely say I would not be the person I am today had I not joined this forum 11 months ago. And that person would be very lost, scared, hurt, and undeveloped.

Being here has allowed me to have a deeper understanding of people, how they work, and understanding myself. I have had so many epiphanies since joining this forum it is astounding, and nearly all of them have been sparked by stuff that has gone on here.

It has all been a good change, and I would not have it any other way. This forum has been so useful to me, and it has been such a wonderful place. And I know for sure it is going to continoue to be.

 

I would say not really. When I'm really stressed out from forum issues I tend to turn more to IRL. I did this when the board I was on for at least 2 years and a mod on pretty much screwed me and kicked me to the curb.

 

Online activities do not affect me in this way anymore. I used to take everything very seriously. That's long gone.

In general, people are more strange and more rude online, than they would behave in your real face. Can't impress me. Everybody here may look extraordinary, and in fact they are all quite normal.

This realization comes along with general apathy about individual "importance". I admire certain people, I may think they are "better" than me (whatever "better" should mean), and I still think they are just people, no big deal. I look at presidents, royalties, celebrities, scientists, sportsmen, authors etc, and each one is just a guy or a girl, like all the others. There's nothing so special about anyone.

As a result, I don't think any culture in particular could influence my behavior as easily, as it could have happened some years ago.

 

I feel like I've learned a lot since joining the forum. Not necessarily facts and truths but rather how to deal with all different types of people and how to approach debates in a logical and well thought out well. I feel that since joining this forum I've become better at stepping out of myself and viewing a situation from all sides.

I guess I'd disagree with you on some parts of your post. First, personally I think most of the people on this forum actually are extraordinary people (isn't extraordinary a weird word? I mean it basically looks like being extra-ordinary. Sounds pretty boring to me). There are a number of people on this forum that I think actually could and would impress me in real life. Yeah we're all just people, but some are extra swell.

Secondly, I've always had a feeling that we and our behaviors are based off of experience. I come from the school of thought that interactions with other cultures do change and mold who we are even if it's in ways we don't always perceive. But that's just my two cents.

 

lol well, yes in a sort of way but to me unlike mentioned here, I tend to come off as nicer in real life...why? because online is the place where I Can express my true feelings without being hated for it, where I can interact with people who actually think and have similar values to that of mines, irl, I just tend to smile at everyone, but it's all so mechanical, so fake,and it has not helped me in anyway. irl, I may be very quiet, and conflict avoidant but when it comes to online and places such as this one I'm not afraid to express my emotions, and share my personal values with everyone.

 

I'm quite dissapointed with my real self. I have learnt a HUGE amount about myself and others through being on this forum. Unfortunately, I don't feel I can apply what I've learnt in a way which would outwardly effect other people and the way I interact with them. This has disappointed me greatly, considering this time in my life is the perfect testing ground.

 

I would say that my experiences on the INFJ forums have marginally impacted the way I interact with people on a daily basis. I'm the same as I've ever been.

That being said, however; since joining the forums in late June, I've discovered a lot about myself. Some folks really have some very interesting insights and perspectives that, in turn, have triggered a number of miniature epiphanies and self discoveries over on this end of the screen. I enjoy posts like this one where questions call for a bit of self-examining; what do you think? What are your experiences? Sometimes I surprise myself with my own answers.

Good question!

 

Once again, excellent questions.

The forum does not in any way affect how I see myself when interacting everyday, even in the past when I was here. I used it as a way to get more in-depth and play with my personality type, different modes of expression, and my feelings that I never get a chance to explore. But I was extremely casual and didn't really consider everyone here as much as I could have. I wish they had put something on the front of the page that says the expectations here are really, truly "business casual" and not "laid-back". Because my "laid-back" is very different from a lot of the people here.

"Does it change the way you behave or react to others because of your experiences here on the forum?" : I react differently to the forum itself and to the members. I don't say much, but I enjoy reading about everyone else. Its a very, very "Fe"-based/biased forum I came to learn. Much more so than Ni. At first I thought I could be free to express some of my feelings without giving too much away, but over time I think it was too much. I've grown to pay more attention to what others are saying, and now I use it as a "road-guide for improving business casual Fe-style" so to speak. And I just get bored and post some stuff I'm checking out. People are very sensitive here; much more than I had at first suspected, so in a way it helps me to get in touch with my "sensitive"-side I guess. But I can't do it too much. And there's nothing to gain from it other than, preventing embarrassing myself in some way. It doesn't though affect any way how I react or interact with people outside the forum. Outside the forum, I'm a very different person. I don't get a chance to talk to people very much, and when I do, it's all formal, work-related, or related to studies. I thought here I have a chance to kick back, but I realized over time, that's not a great idea. Most people here seem to be from Europe or another culture or something, and I feel a lot of times how I come off when I'm just being playful, sarcastic, or whatever at the end of a long day as "insensitive". But after reading a lot of threads, I do like a lot of the people here and respect them. They show me that people are deep down, regardless of issues/biases, are good and just trying to do the right thing.