Do I still have a chance? | INFJ Forum

Do I still have a chance?

Status
Not open for further replies.
T

The Jester

Okay, I've had this big crush on a girl for so long, and about 2 months ago I told her via a text message.
I just did it via a text message because she was going to be at a festival and I wouldn't be able to see her for a week, and the urge to get it off my heart was so big.
She turned me down, and a week after my text message, we met because she still wanted to see me and gave me the opportunity to talk about my feelings.

I told her what I thought about her, and told her how strong my feelings are for her.
She said that she was just not looking for a relationship that time, because she came out of a long one a few months before that.
I asked her if I'd have a chance of dating her when she wouldn't be in that situation, and she said yes.

Now I was wondering, should I ask her out again in the future, when she's ready for it, or did she just say that so she wouldn't hurt my feelings?
When I asked her about it, she said she was honest and I believed her, but I'm always a bit paranoid.
Did I blow my chances or do I get another try? Important: I may have burnt my bridges by saying I'd try to get over it.
But I just can't, because I know she is the right person for me.

I think she finds me a funny person (we had our own jokes, and at least she understood mine <.<), and she told me I wasn't like other guys she knew and I think she found me a bit intelligent. I just got this from what she told me, of course she could've been lying just to make me feel good. The intelligent and funny part were on different occassions, not after the rejection.

So do you guys think I'd have another chance of asking her out or did she just say it to make me feel better?
I can't get over it and still love her with my whole heart. Btw, we kept contact via text message, and I'm thinking about asking her for a drink soon.
 
Surrender all hope.
 
I don't know. I can't tell based on what you said. If I were you, I'd just stay friends with her and maybe try again later.
 
Pfft I know I shouldn't keep hoping, because it's really killing me. But I can't just shut my feelings off, can I?
The thought that I cannot be with her is so painful.
 
I don't know. I can't tell based on what you said. If I were you, I'd just stay friends with her and maybe try again later.

"We're sorry, you're request for a relationship cannot be completed at this time. Please stay friends and try again later."

Classy.
 
  • Like
Reactions: HaHa
Sorry to say, prank, but none of us here are mind readers. We can’t even begin to tell you, with any definite certainty, what anyone is thinking or feeling. I think, however, that you shouldn’t automatically assume that she said anything of the sort to spare your feelings. There’s an equal chance that she was being honest; after all, if she really wasn’t accepting of your romantic feelings, I doubt she would have given you a chance to explain them to her when you two were face to face, or told you candidly that she would consider a date at a later time.

Personally, I would give it a shot. It sounds like this girl is rather considerate and understanding person; you’ve really got nothing to lose.
 
Hey, until she says you don't have a chance keep fighting until the end. You can't give up, INFJ's don't give up. Steal a kiss if you have to, make her aware that your intentions are clear. Good luck buddy :)
 
You might think she is right for you emotionally.....but she can't be right for you if she turned you down. Simple as that. Move on and find someone who is available....

I did that when someone was giving me mixed messages...I told them it's their loss and I moved on and out of no where I found someone even better!

If you narrow down everything you just said....ask yourself this question: Why waste your time on someone who technically doesn't give a shit? Your not going to get anywhere and you cant make someone date you...Usually when a chick says no the first time...they mean it forever.
 
yes, you have a chance. however small it might be.
 
"We're sorry, you're request for a relationship cannot be completed at this time. Please stay friends and try again later."

Classy.

I'm an opportunist slant. If it were me, I'd be looking for someone else while waiting.

Its terrible, but its true.
 
Pfft I know I shouldn't keep hoping, because it's really killing me. But I can't just shut my feelings off, can I?
The thought that I cannot be with her is so painful.

There are other women. You can find someone to shift feelings.
 
There are other women. You can find someone to shift feelings.

I know, but I'm actually not interested in any other :/
She's all I want, and I know you'll say that it's normal to think that when you have a crush on someone, but my feelings for her are just so strong.
And I'd find myself selfish if I just searched for someone so I could forget about her, while the other person has feelings too. (I know I took it to an extreme)
 
Hmm I would try it again, then if it goes wrong or if she requires more time, put the ball in her court and move on! plenty more fish in the sea!

But get closure! yes or no? and If she wants more time have it that she comes to you when shes ready and move on in the mean time!
 
Even if she does like you, she'll bounce you around a bit because they can.
 
Well I don't know, she might be a good person.
 
Well I don't know, she might be a good person.
Okay, but I interpreted your answer as 2 things:
1) She'll play with your feelings
2) she'd play hard to get to see if you really want her
 
She'll play with your feelings. Probably.

Guess you're right. At the end of the meeting, she gave me a kiss on my cheek.
Not that I find that weird, but she just didn't do that before.
Back then I just thought she didn't take me serious.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.