Crushes, love them or hate them? | INFJ Forum

Crushes, love them or hate them?

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by justeccentricnotinsane, Oct 18, 2008.

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  1. justeccentricnotinsane

    justeccentricnotinsane Community Member

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    I always have a crush. In fact I feel restless and uncomforatble when I don't. I always think about the future. I have a five year plan :) In fact I've pretty much planned my whole life out. And relationships (the perfect one, obviously!) are a big part of that plan. I'm also a huge fantasist to the point where I get irritated when people pull me out of a day dream. Day dreams making up MOST of my existence, (the rest of my existence is working on ways to make them come true) and I love to day dream about men. It has to be my favourite past time.

    So anyway, I love crushes. I have a lot of confidence in my ability to catch the right guy and in my own attractiveness and I love the excitement and mystery that goes with with being obsessed by someone and fantasising about what might happen.

    I also hate crushes. I am TOO obsessive. I can't STOP thinking about whatever guy I'm thinking about. And sometimes I get a crush on the wrong guy. For instance, I currently have an awful crush on a guy I knew years ago who I've got back in touch with recently over Facebook. He got fit :) Really fit. But everything in my body is telling me there's something wrong about him. He's a bit odd and quite pretentious and I think he needs the reassurance that everyone likes him which can give him a slightly manipulative edge at times. But, conversely, I believe him to be a genuinely nice person. Just too controlled by his own insecurities. Having talked to others that know him better I have discivered my intuitions to be accurate. So now I want to stop thinking about him. But this, it turns out, is completely impossible.

    So that's my story. How about you? Crushes - a good thing, a bad thing, a plain and simple annoying thing?
     
  2. Shai Gar

    Shai Gar Guest

    You can crush on me if you want. Until the edge wears off...

    I'm cool like that.
     
  3. OP
    justeccentricnotinsane

    justeccentricnotinsane Community Member

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    You couldn't handle me, my friend. :-D
     
  4. HolySmoke

    HolySmoke endeavoring to persevere

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    Diana. The Huntress. I understand this very well. Imagine what may come of it if you focus all of that energy and verve on something other than your conquests?
     
  5. Shai Gar

    Shai Gar Guest

    Oh, see, I think I could.
    :mcry:
     
  6. OP
    justeccentricnotinsane

    justeccentricnotinsane Community Member

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    I agree...imagine if I did something productive with my energies...I really wish I did something prodcutive. Tommorrow. I'll do something worthwhile tomorrow. Tonight I'm going to eat and stare at the computer screen.
     
  7. HolySmoke

    HolySmoke endeavoring to persevere

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    :ml:

    me too, probabaly!
     
  8. Eric86

    Eric86 Community Member

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    lol this thread is silly....


    I actually don't think I've ever had a crush before.
     
  9. Silently Honest

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    I've had, a crush or two. Which was nice, but I could live without it, but then again I imagine most guys can.
     
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  10. Skye

    Skye Newbie

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    I totally have crush on someone - most of the time someone who is not available to me. Look up the term "Limerence" - it all falls into place then, at least, it feels more "normal" to be in that 'obsessive' state for a while.
     
  11. Mannit

    Mannit Community Member

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    Yeahhhhhhhhhhhh I have a "crush". But it's merely based on observation. This guys knows me...but doesn't really know me. If that even makes sense. I don't know if I like it or not. It's exciting at one point, thinking something will come of it...but then all that is crushed by feelings of inadequacy. *shrugs*

    I don't know what to make of it, or what this post is even adding to the thread haha, but felt inclined to comment. :p
     
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  12. TK*

    TK* Community Member

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    Man, I hated all of my crushes. Mostly in middle school did I "crush." I hated feeling so awkward and insecure whenever I was around them! It annoyed me that I couldn't just Fe my way through to them.

    I'm in a serious relationship now, but sometimes I look at a guy and think: "you know...I would crush all over that man if I wasn't in love with my boyfriend." Haha, I wonder if that makes me a bad girlfriend!

    (ESTPs are my kryptonite--although I don't think I could EVER maintain a serious relationship with one)
     
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  13. ohmermaid

    ohmermaid Community Member

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    it's strange for me, i tend to develop crushes only after i know that the guy has a crush on me (assuming he's cute). otherwise, i do find them annoying. i don't like feeling like i don't have any control. ):
     
  14. J. Cardigan

    J. Cardigan Community Member

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    I like crushes, especially now that I have a better idea of what to do about them.

    It's rather discouraging when you find out they're either taken or wrong for you, though.

    Oh well.
     
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  15. Lurker

    Lurker Has nothing to destroy
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    I rarely have crushes but there’s a couple of guys that have gotten under my skin lately [​IMG]

    I understand your love/hate relationship with them justeccentricnotinsane and kinda feel the same. I have a habit of preferring to avoid reality in favour of imagining what could be, I have my reasons for doing that and it's not all as bad as it sounds. I basically class them as innocent infatuations, nothing more.

    Methinks the best thing would be to convince my mind that they would not be suitable but my mind will not be convinced. Le sigh.
     
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  16. Shai Gar

    Shai Gar Guest

    aww i dont even have older cousins to hook you up with
     
  17. Lurker

    Lurker Has nothing to destroy
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    Teehee Gowd no, the last thing I want right now is a relationship of any kind :fear:
     
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  18. Shai Gar

    Shai Gar Guest

    informal nomnoms?
     
  19. Lurker

    Lurker Has nothing to destroy
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    I said; Of any kind! :D
     
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