Check Ups & Self Care for Types

It's important to have a good relationship with yourself, and we all need some care for ourselves every now and then, so I thought to give it a shot and gather some findings in here (mostly regarding MBTI, Enneagram, Archetypes but also in general).

I would like this to be a place for sharing findings and inspiring (type oriented if it is a thing), or even quick kick-starting self-care when you need it, because honestly its very often a topic.

Please, remember: decide for yourself what suits you personally, and what makes logically sense to you.


Additional Threads (Forum Self-Care Kit):

• Discuss personal self-care experiences: Self-Care: What have you done for you lately?
• Sensory Self-Care (Grounding) 1: What are your favorite healthy ways to engage Se?
• Sensory Self-Care (Grounding) 2: Best Enriching Se Activities
• .
• Being Present for INFJ: LIFE IN AN OVERACTIVE MIND : Intuition and Mindfulness
• Discuss being present 1: INFJ's and being more present
• Discuss being present 2: INFJs and Being Present, or Lack Thereof
• .
• Tunes, Links about calming the mind: Magical Meditation Corner
• Discuss Meditation Experiences: Your Meditation Experiences
• Visual Calm vibes: Calm
  
• Meditative Exercises: Coloring... YAY!
• Enhance your Awareness 1: Mindfulness Practice
• Enhance your Awareness 2: Noticed anything today?
• .
• Instant Good vibes 1: Cute, Funny, Weird Cats
• Instant Good vibes 2: Funny Picture Thread
• Good thoughts, the Grateful Thread: I am grateful for...
• Good thoughts, the daily Positivity: What made you smile today?
• .
• Quoted: Affirmations, Philosophies & Beliefs: Thoughts, Feelings, Beliefs, and Philosophies
• Quoted: Wisdom & Sayings: Post your favorite quotes
• Growth-oriented thoughts: What have you learned today?
  
• Appreciate yourself 1: What's your favorite aspect of yourself?
• Appreciate yourself 2: How do you celebrate yourself, your steps, accomplishments and life?
• Being Aware of what is important to you in life: Being Remembered
• .
• Write down the unexpressed: Dear So and So
• Space to emote negative (& beautiful) feelings: Sad Melancholy Thread
• Express your mood & feels 1: Post your mood in picture form
• Express your mood & feels 2: Write what you feel
• Express your mood & feels 3: Post your mood in music format
• Express your self and hopes: Post your favourite poems
• On Journaling: journaling, do you keep a journal or read them?
• Open up and share 1: Write what you think
• Open up and share 2: Confess Something Not So Anonymously
• .
• Connect with your Inner Child: So, what does your inner child look like?
• Understand your Suppressed Side: The Shadows
  
• .
• Boundary-related issues: Where you end and I begin
• Setting boundaries: How do you say no?
• ...

Ok, first of all..


General Types of Self-Care:

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Spoiler: when you need xy type of self-care

1. Emotional Self-care
Emotional is one of the most common self-care types and there are reasons why it is so popular and important. Emotion is what decides our performance and no matter how hard you try to avoid, it will always affect your actions, your mind, and your body. But there is no bad or good emotion, all your emotions are valuable and need special attention. The key to managing your emotional health is to fully accept it and fully respond to it. Hiding or pushing down your feelings only make it worse and leads to stress. So face your emotion head-on and practice emotional self-care.

• When you need emotional self-care:

– You are stressed.
– You are emotionally unstable.
– You are sleep deprived.
– Insecure, self-doubt and negative thoughts in your head.

• Ideas for emotional self-care:

– Consult a Psychologist.
– Mediate.
– Write an emotion journal.
– Listen and sing your favorite song.
– Learn to accept yourself.
– Stop holding back your tears.
– Really listen to your self-talk.


2. Physical Self-care
Self-care also covers physical aspects of your health to make sure you have a healthy body. Physical activities are not only important for your fitness but also helps in reducing stress and other mental benefits.

And since it is self-care, it focuses on helping you feel good rather than just pushes you to work out every day. Physical self-care isn’t just about going to the gym. Dancing, jogging, yoga, playing a sport or even walking is a physical self-care activity, as long as you feel good and love doing it. So pick up a physical hobby that you enjoy and spend more time on it.

Furthermore, physical self-care is not only about actions, it also about relaxing and keeping yourself balanced. Take a nap, slow down when you are tired or not well, have 7-8 hours of sleep, keep your skin glowing are also important acts of physical self-care

• When you need physical self-care:

– You skip meals.
– You don’t exercise.
– You have a poor diet.
– You are sleep deprived.
– You feel weak, heavy and prone to sickness.

• Ideas for physical self-care

– Dancing.
– Yoga.
– Learn a new sport.
– Go for a walk or a hike.
– Take your dog out.
– Improve your skincare routine.
– Keep a diet and sleeping journal for tracking.


3. Social Self-care
Connecting with other people is important for everybody whether you are an extrovert or introvert. Therefore, social self-care is another important aspect but doesn’t get much attention. Socializing is a crucial factor to fight loneliness, isolation and negative thoughts. It helps you feel that you are not alone and feel the love and care from other people.

And social self-care is not simply just hanging out and doing things with other people, it focuses on doing good things with some great people that you love spending time with. They are the ones that make you feel comfortable, understood and add value to your life.

• When you need social self-care:

– You feel lonely.
– You feel lonely even with a group of people.
– You feel lost and misunderstood.
– You have no time for yourself.
– You don’t have anyone to really talk to.

• Ideas for social self-care

– Reach out for someone you haven’t seen in a while.
– Cook for your family and friend.
– Join a hobby club.
– Call someone who lives far away.
– Disconnect with people who make you feel uncomfortable.
– Say no when you want to.


Source
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Source
https://justmyenneatype.wordpress.com/

 

Source:
https://www.instagram.com/enneagramandcoffee/

 

Source:
https://www.psychologyjunkie.com/2017/09/18/self-care-myers-briggs-personality-type/

Self-Care for Each Myers-Briggs® Personality Type

Self-care is one of those terms that I tend to cringe at. As a perfectionist and a very busy mom of four I tend to shirk off “self-care” as superficial and simply not built into my timeframe. One thing that people don’t often realize about INFJs is that many of us are overachievers. Sure we don’t necessarily have that domineering go-getter persona (well, at least I don’t), but inside we tend to be extreme perfectionist and hold unattainably high standards for ourselves. But don’t worry, this post isn’t all about INFJs (or me). The point is, self-care is essential. It isn’t just about soaking in a tub, sipping wine, and wearing cucumbers over your eyelids…although that may be an excellent idea! It’s not all about manicures and extravagant vacations. It’s about maintaining your wellness and making time for your own interests and stress-reducing activities. When you ignore that (like I tend to do a lot) you almost always suffer the consequences.

Not sure what your personality type is? Personality Hacker has the most accurate free online personality indicator I’ve been able to find. Click here to take it. (Link is an affiliate link).

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Consequences of Ignoring Self-Care:

Ignoring your own needs can make you resentful of the people you are spending all your time serving. Nobody wants that. You don’t want that, and your family and friends will be able to sense your resentment. It will almost always end up hurting relationships and making you feel worse than ever.

Ignoring self care can mean serious health consequences; not only physically, but mentally. For example, did you know that laughter lowers your blood pressure, reduces stress hormones, works your abs, and improves cardiac health? Do you know what exhaustion does? It can negatively impact your heart health, make you more prone to obesity, high blood pressure and diabetes.

For me, ignoring self-care means migraines, losing my hair, feeling depressed and stressed. My PTSD, which I fight daily to keep at bay, flares up more.

I mean, really guys…or…me (because I still inwardly want ignore self-care) it’s time we took care of ourselves! And not just in a once-a-year way; in a regular, attainable way. So here are some options for each personality type. Keep in mind, there are LOTS of ways each type can enjoy self-care. I’d like to do a whole series about this topic that goes into more depth. But for now, this is a good introduction for each type.

Spoiler: ISTJ Self-Care

ISTJ Self-Care

ISTJs are extremely focused on their responsibilities and tasks. They are driven by their goals and can get stuck in a routine of over-working or bending over backwards to meet deadlines. It’s important for them to take time for themselves; time to get away and reassess their own needs, desires, and goals. Many ISTJs find that exercising helps to clear their head, others enjoy listening to a favorite song, while others just enjoy talking over their struggles and finding solutions with a very close friend. As Si-dominant personalities, it’s important for ISTJs to take time to reflect without having to worry about deadlines, to-do lists, and social responsibilities.

Some ISTJ Self-Care Ideas:
– Cancel non-essential responsibilities and take time for yourself.
– Exercise. This will boost stress-relieving endorphins and help clear your head from worry.
– Watch a favorite movie or read a favorite book.
– Play a puzzle, strategy, or word game.
– Take a walk in nature and notice every sight, sound, and smell.
– Spend time with a trusted friend or family member one-on-one.
– Catch up on sleep!

Related: Getting to Know the ISTJ

Spoiler: ISFJ Self-Care

ISFJ Self-Care

ISFJs are extremely generous and devoted individuals who tend to overwork themselves in an effort to meet their family or community’s needs. They often feel selfish when they take time for their own interests, and can get so caught up in taking care of other people that they forget to take care of themselves. Many ISFJs find that one-on-one time with a good friend (a friend who knows how to really listen) is important. Other ISFJs find that time alone in nature refreshes them.

Some ISFJ Self-Care Ideas:
– Cancel non-essential responsibilities and take time for yourself.
– Take a moment to write down a list of your own desires and needs. You can get so caught up in taking care of other people that you forget about your own personal needs.
– Vent out your feelings in a journal or with a trusted friend.
– Laugh. Find a favorite comedy or TV show, curl up with your favorite snack, and let loose.
– Take a walk in nature and notice every beautiful detail. Take pictures of things you find especially beautiful.
– Catch up on rest.

Related: 10 Things You Should Never Say to an ISFJ

Spoiler: ESTJ Self-Care

ESTJ Self-Care

ESTJs are hard workers and tend to fill up their days with tasks and responsibilities. They may get so caught up in deadlines and projects that they forget to just enjoy the little things or appreciate what they’ve accomplished along the way. Socializing with good friends tends to recharge ESTJs, but they also need to make time to wind down and enjoy the fruits of their labors.

Some ESTJ Self-Care Ideas:
– Engage in a relaxing, hands-on hobby like gardening, cooking, or crafting.
– Exercise! This releases stress-reducing endorphins in your brain.
– Take a long, hot soak in the tub and think about your many blessings.
– Play a fun sport with your friends.
– Relax and enjoy a favorite movie.
– Watch a favorite sporting event on TV.
– Catch up on sleep.
– Eat a stress-reducing snack like nuts, oatmeal, dark chocolate (in moderation), or salmon.

Related: How Each Myers-Briggs® Type Reacts to Stress (and How to Help!)

Spoiler: ESFJ Self-Care

ESFJ Self-Care

ESFJs are hands-on helpers who work tirelessly to take care of the people in their lives. They are usually looking for practical ways they can contribute to their communities and families and tend to prefer a busy life of activity and friendship. Self-care for the ESFJ often revolves around friendship; whether it’s meeting a friend for a hot cup of coffee, or taking a jog with their partner. They also need occasional time alone to refresh themselves and process all their thoughts.

Some ESFJ Self-Care Ideas:
– Meet a friend for coffee and conversation.
– Engage in a tranquil, independent activity like baking, crafting, or outdoor photography.
– Exercise with a friend.
– Give yourself a spa day; enjoy a facial, take a soak in a hot tub, give yourself a pedicure.
– Sing along to your favorite songs.
– Pick a small project that needs organizing and work on that while listening to peaceful music.
– Make sure you’re getting enough sleep.

Related: Understanding ESFJ Feeling

Spoiler: ISTP Self-Care

ISTP Self-Care

ISTPs keep their minds (and hands) busy by analyzing, fixing, and troubleshooting. They are often clever mentally and skilled in technical and mechanical fields. They like to balance plenty of activities with lots of alone time to relax and refresh themselves. According to the MBTI® Manual, ISTPs like to de-stress by watching television. That said, many ISTPs I spoke with had alternate self-care preferences. You can see some suggestions below.

Some ISTP Self-Care Ideas:
– Do a sport that requires concentration. Something like racquetball or golf.
– Go for a long drive.
– Hang out on the couch with some good food and your favorite TV shows.
– Play your favorite video game.
– Catch up on some much-needed rest.
– Snack on foods that relieve stress (nuts, red peppers, dark chocolate, and salmon are several good choices).

Related: The Top 25 Favorite ISTP Movies

Spoiler: ISFP Self-Care

ISFP Self-Care

ISFPs are a fascinating and often misunderstood personality type. They balance a bold desire for adventure with kindness, sensitivity, and compassion. People often mistake their soft-spoken demeanor for weakness, when in fact they have a certain restless bravery that drives them. They are often found in healthcare fields, business, and law enforcement and they excel in the arts and anything that uses their realistic life skills. ISFPs tend to be a high-stress type. According to the MBTI® Manual they experience high stress in relation to finances, children, health, and caring for aging parents. It’s important for these individuals to take time out of their schedule to de-stress and enjoy some quiet alone time to reflect and process their thoughts.

Some ISFP Self-Care Ideas:
– Get some soft blankets, a few healthy snacks, and enjoy a TV marathon of your favorite show.
– Take a walk in nature and notice every sight, sound, and texture.
– Get out some art supplies and create whatever your imagination brings to mind.
– Journal your thoughts and feelings.
– Exercise to release stress-reducing endorphins in your brain.
– Catch up on sleep.
– Get a massage.
– Enjoy some stress-reducing snacks like nuts, red bell peppers, dark chocolate (in moderation), or oatmeal.

Related: 10 Surprising Truths About ISFPs

Spoiler: ESTP Self-Care

ESTP Self-Care

ESTPs are known for their charisma, adventurous nature, and quick-witted adaptability to life. These types are rarely flustered or overwhelmed, in fact, according to the MBTI® Manual, ESTPs experience the lowest stress of all the personality types. That said, they can still work themselves too hard, push themselves (often physically) to a breaking point, or forget to take care of their health needs. ESTPs thrive on action and actually enjoy sports more than any of the other Myers-Briggs® types. For them, it’s important to remember to rest, recharge, and take a little time for peace and quiet (before getting back into action!).

Some ESTP Self-Care Ideas:
– Make sure you’re getting enough rest.
– Enjoy a few safe, impulsive decisions, like going out for ice cream or taking $10. and spending it anywhere.
– Play a sport.
– Play a favorite video game.
– Go hiking in nature.
– Go on a bike ride.
– Relax at home with one of your favorite TV series and a healthy snack.

Related: Understanding ESTP Sensing

Spoiler: ESFP Self-Care

ESFP Self-Care

ESFPs are known for their compassion, adaptability, and sense of adventure. These types know how to “make lemons out of lemonade” and turn even the bleakest crisis into a positive experience. They work hard to make people laugh and feel at ease, and they also are attracted to excitement and thrills. For the ESFP self-care means balancing social time with alone time. It’s important for them to make time to process their thoughts and feelings, and it’s also important to connect with others in friendship. ESFPs tend to experience stress when trying to make long-term, important decisions. It can be helpful for them to have a good friend to confide in during times when they feel unsure about which direction to take.

Some ESFP Self-Care Ideas:
– Get some alone time to listen to music and process your feelings.
– Go for a hike or a jog in nature and notice all the beauty around you.
– Do yoga or another relaxing exercise.
– Go out for dinner or coffee with some trusted friends.
– Call some good friends and enjoy a carefree game night together.
– Catch up on sleep.
– If you’re feeling overwhelmed with long-term decisions, enlist the help of a trusted (but not pushy) friend who can help you sort through your options.

Related: The Top 7 Gift Ideas for ESFPs

Spoiler: INTJ Self-Care

INTJ Self-Care

INTJs are visionary, future-focused and logical. These types have active minds and are determined to make good use of their time. They are excellent organizers, strategists, and innovators who embrace the future with determination and logical foresight. Self-care for the INTJ means getting plenty of time alone to process and synthesize information. INTJs who rely heavily on their auxiliary function (Extraverted Thinking) can get stuck in “action” mode and be so focused on getting things done that they forget to give their mind time to wander, tinker with ideas, and access intuition. Finding time for uninhibited thought and musing is important for this type.

INTJ Self-Care Ideas:
– Cancel non-essential responsibilities and get some quality alone time.
– Read a favorite book or listen to some classical music.
– Play a musical instrument.
– Talk to a counselor or trusted friend if you’re experiencing ongoing stress or depression.
– Exercise.
– Catch up on sleep.
– Go to a quiet place and just let your mind wander without any real direction. Just see where your intuition might lead you.

Related: Getting to Know the INTJ
and How Each Myers-Briggs® Type Reacts to Stress (and How to Help!)

Spoiler: INFJ Self-Care

INFJ Self-Care

INFJs are known for their keen insights, their empathy, and their vision for the future. These individuals are often perfectionists who push themselves to an ideal that is almost unattainable. This tends to be the cause of much of their stress. They also tend to struggle with over-empathizing with the people around them to a degree where they feel overwhelmed. It’s important for them to get plenty of alone time to process and synthesize their thoughts, access intuition, and figure out their path for the future. It’s also important for them to balance this alone time with time spent around good friends or family members who accept them for who they are and are willing to listen to their thoughts and concerns.

INFJ Self-Care Ideas:
– Get some alone time to just think and process without any real direction. Let your intuition take the wheel.
– Read a favorite book and listen to some classical music.
– Take a walk in nature and enjoy every sight, sound, and texture.
– Spend time with animals.
– Talk to a trusted counselor or friend if you’re feeling extremely stressed or depressed.
– Exercise.
– Get some healthy snacks and enjoy some Netflix.
– Take a hot bath or shower.

Want a comprehensive guide to the INFJ personality type? Check out my eBook, The INFJ – Understanding the Mystic.

Related: INFJs and the Challenge of Staying Present

Spoiler: ENTJ Self-Care

ENTJ Self-Care

ENTJs are extremely ambitious, hard-working, and determined. They love to triumph over new challenges and they continually strive to improve and tackle new skills and goals. These types may laugh at the idea of “self-care” and feel that their lives are too busy and full to take the time for it. However, they do tend to enjoy exercising to relieve stress or discussing solutions and ideas with their friends.

Self-Care Ideas for ENTJs:
– Get some exercise to release stress-reducing endorphins.
– Make sure you’re getting enough sleep.
– Eat stress-reducing snacks like nuts, dark chocolate (in moderation), salmon, oatmeal, or red bell pepper strips.
– If you’re feeling stressed, take some time to re-analyze your situation and make a list of attainable goals.
– Vent to a trusted friend.
– Enjoy the company of good friends over dinner.
– Work, but don’t overdo it (many ENTJs mentioned that work is a form of self-care for them!).

Related: 10 Things You Should Never Say to an ENTJ

Spoiler: ENFJ Self-Care

ENFJ Self-Care

ENFJs are known for their inspirational nature, their empathy, and their vision for the future. These types are often enthusiastic and full of energy and excitement about their dreams and the dreams of their friends. When it comes to self care, these types need to remember not to give themselves away to such a degree that they are physically or emotionally depleted. They tend to have a hard time saying no to anyone who needs help. So making time examine their own needs and desires is important. It’s also important for them to remember that a little alone time can be a good thing and can help them tap into their intuition and become more balanced.

Self-Care Ideas for ENFJs:
– Find a trusted friend to talk to one-on-one.
– Exercise with a good friend.
– Spend time with animals.
– Catch up on sleep!
– Enjoy some time in nature; notice every sight, sound, and texture.
– Get some of your favorite snacks and watch a light-hearted movie.
– Think about your own personal goals and imagine ways to reach them.
– Do yoga or another relaxing, quiet exercise.

Related: Understanding ENFJ Feeling

Spoiler: INTP Self-Care

INTP Self-Care

INTPs are independent, complex individuals who prize knowledge, innovation, and theoretical possibilities. These types love to learn and challenge themselves mentally, but they also enjoy making time for their own leisure activities. INTPs tend to balance out independent learning time with favorite activities like playing computer or video games, reading, or enjoying art. For INTPs, self-care is important because they tend to have high stress levels. According to the MBTI® Manual, INTPs experience high stress in relation to school, children, and intimate relationships.

Self-Care Ideas for INTPs:
– Cancel non-essential responsibilities and enjoy some alone time.
– Play a favorite computer or video game.
– Get some healthy snacks and enjoy a new, interesting TV series.
– Listen to music.
– Read a new, compelling book.
– Take a drive or a walk in nature.
– Catch up on sleep.
– Find an independent exercise to do alone, like tai-chi, jogging, or yoga.

Related: 10 Things You Should NEVER Say to an INTP

Spoiler: INFP Self-Care

INFP Self-Care

INFPs are known for their compassion, creativity, and rich imagination. These types are often artists, writers, or counselors. Improving the world and finding creative forms of self-expression are vitally important to them. Self-care is extremely important for INFPs, because they tend to have high stress levels, and according to the MBTI® Manual, they tend to have higher instances of depression than many of the other types. It’s very important for them to get regular alone time, time for creativity, and time to reflect on their emotions and explore their own interests and desires.

Self-Care Ideas for INFPs:
– Take some time to write, whether it’s journaling or creative writing.
– Get lost in a favorite book!
– Cancel non-essential responsibilities and enjoy some quality alone time.
– Spend time with animals.
– Visit an art museum.
– Create art, even if you’re not a pro at it.
– Listen to music.
– Catch up on sleep.
– Take a quiet walk in nature and notice all the beauty around you.

Related: 12 Stress-Busting Techniques for INFPs

Spoiler: ENTP Self-Care

ENTP Self-Care

ENTPs are known for their enterprising, intellectual nature. These visionaries are driven to see the potential of every possibility that crosses their mind. They tend to be optimists, and according to the MBTI® Manual they have lower stress than almost all of the other personality types (besides ESTPs). Self-care for ENTPs means making time for creativity, getting alone time to fully utilize their auxiliary thinking function, and maintaining their physical wellness. Because ENTPs have inferior Introverted Sensing (Si) they tend to forget to take care of their physical needs as they pursue endless ideas and possibilities.

Self-Care Ideas for ENTPs:
– Go out driving with no particular destination in mind.
– Catch up on sleep.
– Make sure you’re eating healthy and at regular intervals.
– Explore new music or play an instrument.
– Play a strategy game or solve a brainteaser.
– Learn something new (watch a TED Talk or find a new idea to explore).
– Play a sport with some friends.
– Play a favorite computer or video game.
– Read a book.

Related: 10 Surprising Truths About ENTPs

Spoiler: ENFP Self-Care

ENFP Self-Care

ENFPs are known for their enthusiasm, compassion, and endless ideas for the future. These types are driven to make the world a better place, to explore the potential of every idea, and to understand people on a meaningful level. When it comes to self-care, ENFPs need to remember to take time for peace and quiet. They are often referred to as the “most introverted extroverts” and mention the need for alone time regularly. They also need to remember to take care of their physical needs. Because they have inferior Introverted Sensing (Si) they can become out of touch with their bodies when they are focused on their ideas (which is almost all the time!).

Self-Care Ideas for ENFPs:
– Make sure you’re getting enough sleep.
– Examine your day and make sure you’re getting enough healthy food to eat.
– Listen to music or play an instrument.
– Visit an art museum and immerse yourself in each picture.
– Read a book.
– Do some creative writing or journaling.
– Plan a trip or adventure, even if you can’t afford for it to be a reality right now. The dream is always good.
– Spend one-on-one time with a good friend.
– Spend time in nature.

Related: Understanding ENFP Wanderlust

 

You're welcome!

 

Aww, thank you, Brit. ❤️❤️❤️

Great to read that you found something!

 

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INFJ Loops and Grips
Loops and grips refer to unhealthy states an INFJ can fall into, either because of acute or prolonged stress or due to over-reliance on their weaker functions. Every type has loops and grips. Each INFJ has their own unique stressors and unhealthy patterns, but we’ve found the following are shared for most INFJs.

Loops
Loops are any time that we’re being defensive about something. Technically speaking, loops emerge from the relationship dynamic between the driver and the 10 year-old process. For INFJs, their loop is introverted because it entails getting stuck in the Perspectives driver and the Accuracy 10 year-old. The INFJ loop happens when the Harmony copilot gets so overwhelmed that the INFJ tries to find solace in Accuracy. For example, an INFJ may feel drowned out or burdened by the psychic energies of others, and feel like the emotions of people in the outer world are flooding them. To shut out these potentially toxic emotions, an INFJ will go into Introverted Thinking, where they don’t have to figure out what’s going on for other people and they don’t have to deal with other people’s bullshit. It’s a place of respite but it’s also easy for the INFJ to get stuck there.


Common Examples of INFJ Loops
1. Hyper-critical of others.
The Ni-Ti loop is problematic because it closes off the INFJ from outside information that they need to correct and calibrate their thinking. What usually results is a critical place where the INFJ looks for reasons to exempt themselves from needing to care about other people and their emotions. Here, the Accuracy process is used to find fault in others so that the INFJ can feel justified in keeping them at arm’s length – especially in relationships where the INFJ is hurt. But Introverted Thinking is not meant to be critical of people, but rather of thoughts, including its own thoughts. It’s not meant to be used defensively.

2. Hiding out in a low-vibration state.
All INFJs need time away from the world so that they can recharge. In an Ni-Ti loop, however, INFJs can be critical, defensive and nurse a cynical attitude toward people in general. It’s the INFJ hiding out from the world whilst in a low emotional and vibrational state.

3. Perfectionistic.
INFJs in the loop can also become highly self-critical. For instance, they might have trouble getting things done in the outside world because they believe they can’t do anything right. “If it can’t be perfect, then I won’t do it at all.” It’s akin to covering nice furniture in plastic. An INFJ can become so focused on perfectly preserving the furniture, that they lose the human component of having it in the first place.

Grips
A grip is any time your 3 year-old process, the most immature and unsophisticated part of who you are, has pulled you into itself and won’t let you out. This happens when your driver process is exhausted. Your driver process will become overtaxed if it’s not the right tool for the job, but it keeps trying to solve the problem anyway, or when it doesn’t get the alone time it needs. When this happens, your driver will take a break and its polar opposite, the 3 year-old, will take over.


Here are some common grip experiences we see in INFJs:

1. Over-indulgence.
In a grip, the INFJ gives into its immature Sensation processes desire for sensual gratification. This could look like over-eating, over-drinking, sex addictions, drug addiction or simply wanting to just sit around and do nothing.

2. Overworking.
The second example of a grip involves a disproportionate belief about what the 3 year-old process requires, resulting in the INFJ working it to the extreme. This can show up in things like over-exercising. This type of grip overworks the 3 year-old rather than indulges it.

3. Purposeful ignorance.
INFJs are wired to be asking questions about the significance of things and figure out what’s going on behind the curtain. The challenge is that once one knows something, one can’t go back. New insight shifts one’s paradigm and demands a change in habits and lifestyle. The INFJ might not be ready to hear the information they’re gathering. If for some reason the implications of this inquiry are overwhelming to the INFJ, they can try to stifle their intuition and revert to a “dumbed down” state. If their intuition leads them down a road that mirrors back to them some cognitive dissonance, maybe presents some information that forces a change in their life that they’re not ready for, some INFJs will allow themselves to be in a perpetual sensory grip of only taking everything at face-value and only being in the moment. They may even take an “It is what it is” attitude to life.

Recap
Our minds employ strategies to help us avoid things that we believe will be too painful to process. These are understandable strategies, but in the long term, they don’t serve us. If you observe yourself in a loop, ask yourself:

1. What is the information I’m missing about the human connection, the human component?
2. Why am I doing this? Is it because I’m not getting my needs met?
3. In order to get out of this loop, what needs can I get met that will help me feel less defensive and under-resourced?

Just like the loop, our grip comes from not getting our needs met. Both of them happen as strategies to avoid reality when we’re under-resourced. One of the most important things an INFJ can do to avoid both the loop and the grip is to make sure they are resourced.

 

Humor is good too

Thanks. They are only findings, though.



You two, let's keep this thread crisp and derailment free, please.