Can someone be too earnest or sincere? | INFJ Forum

Can someone be too earnest or sincere?

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by Gaze, Jan 5, 2010.

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  1. Gaze

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    Now, i've always thought it was a good thing if someone was very honest and sincere as a personality characteristic, but for many people, it's a turnoff, so what does everyone think - can someone be too earnest or sincere? Why or why not?

    Apparently, being too sincere a person makes someone seem a bit too dorky, which is apparently, not such a good thing.
     
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    #1 Gaze, Jan 5, 2010
    Last edited: Jan 5, 2010
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  2. NeverAmI

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    Tactful vs blunt, there are multiple ways to get your message through. I personally believe in balance, or at least striving for balance.

    Expression is an art. Everyone has their own style.
     
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  3. bamf

    bamf Is Watching You
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    You should be quoted in saying this. It's pretty neato.
     
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  4. OP
    Gaze

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    I am speaking of being too sincere as a personality characteristic, not when telling someone to the truth.

    I edit the OP to clarify.
     
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  5. Faye

    Faye ^_^
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    Yes, just because you say something well doesn't mean you should say it. Honesty and sincerity are fine, but it really doesn't matter when someone says something hurtful.

    ".... and I don't mean to hurt your feelings and mean this sincerely, but you make people uncomfortable and scare them."

    See? Doesn't help. Now I want to go shoot myself.
     
  6. Whitefire89

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    Yea man i feel u.

    Im the smae here.

    If my girlfriend asks me(and no i have no female) if i think it makes her look fat...and it does?.ill simply say yea. and u know what takes place next of course but...


    i mean...i dont like holding back or lying. how can that simply be so wrong?

    I think....espesciallly in some women....people want to be lied too. They dont want the truth the know in themselves THATS why they ask others. so that they will be TOLD a lie.

    and i will not fill hat place.:m049:
     
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  7. NeverAmI

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    Do you mean lying to someone about themselves?
     
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  8. dneecey

    dneecey I am who I am.

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    This lesson for myself has been learned through experience (sadly) .... and every person is different...so sometimes I still come across too honest or sincere and make people uncomfortable. :(


    Thank goodness for my empathy. I know I don't always feel that way...but usually I do.
     
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  9. Crow

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    Honesty.
    The price is high, but as with most things that are pricey, it is worth the price.

    Honesty doesn't have to mean saying what might cause harm.
    What you don't say is as important as what you do say.
    When it becomes known that your honesty can be relied upon, you gain respect.

    But the best thing about being honest is that you come to respect yourself.
     
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  10. dneecey

    dneecey I am who I am.

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    I meant in general... I can often be off putting because I am way too sincere...

    People are caught off guard by it...
     
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  11. OP
    Gaze

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    Not exactly, I think the word honest is not the best word. I mean someone just being too sincere as in, they are very real and honest about who they are, very earnest i'd say. Not sure if that clears things up.
     
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  12. dneecey

    dneecey I am who I am.

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    sin⋅cere

    [​IMG] /sɪnˈsɪər/ [​IMG] Show Spelled Pronunciation [sin-seer] [​IMG] Show IPA Use sincere in a Sentence

    See web results for sincere

    See images of sincere

    –adjective, -cer⋅er, -cer⋅est. 1. free of deceit, hypocrisy, or falseness; earnest: a sincere apology. 2. genuine; real: a sincere effort to improve; a sincere friend. 3. pure; unmixed; unadulterated. 4. Obsolete. sound; unimpaired.
     
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  13. OP
    Gaze

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    +1
     
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  14. dneecey

    dneecey I am who I am.

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    Someone who just comes out in the open without beating around the bush or putting up guards, leaving themselves vulnerable to others interpretations.
     
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  15. Wyst

    Wyst Are you there?

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    The one time sincerity seems too sincere to me is in the delivery.

    When the tone of voice carries a sappy/dripping touch to it. Then sincerity can be meant as, "I'm really glad you think that way now" actually sounds like, "I'm really glad you stopped thinking like an asshole".

    Comprende?
     
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  16. Crow

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    Ha.
    Sincerity is the rarest thing there is.
    Western civilization's defining feature might be its hypocrisy.

    The appearance of sincerity is worse than being completely insincere.
     
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  17. NeverAmI

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    No, I don't think too much sincerety is a fault unless you perceive it to be a fault.

    Guaranteed not many people will enjoy or be able to stand it, but those that are open and really listen can benefit.

    You are bound to engage in potential conflict, but that is part of the package.


    But again, I still think it comes back to what your transparency looks like, what shape is the window, what kind of material, and how truly transparent is it?

    I don't think you have to always express your opinion, however. Choosing your words wisely can go a long way, it just depends on how much you want people to know about you and how well you want people to accomodate you.
     
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  18. OP
    Gaze

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    Exactly.
     
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  19. dneecey

    dneecey I am who I am.

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    Well said.... Sometimes, I don't know my limits quick enough however...I should really trust my intuition more.
     
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  20. NeverAmI

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    Doesn't that come back to blunt vs tactful? And also dishonesty.
     
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