blaming yourself for everything
- Thread starter Grey Wolf
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I have focused a lot of attention on recognizing when a situation is out of my hands. It has helped, but it can make me horribly cold at times.
I do tend to accept fault for too much still though.
I don't consider this a bad thing.
I do tend to accept fault for too much still though.
I don't consider this a bad thing.
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Yep.
I just feel like I should have been able to stop it, could've said something different, knew better, should've seen it coming, etc. It's like it's okay for other people to make mistakes, but it isn't okay for me.
And that's kind of a twisted arrogance, methinks.
I just feel like I should have been able to stop it, could've said something different, knew better, should've seen it coming, etc. It's like it's okay for other people to make mistakes, but it isn't okay for me.
And that's kind of a twisted arrogance, methinks.
i think, we should not blame ourselves for everything. But we all have to accept one concept of our life:
Whatever we will do, only we are responsible and creator for it. Mind it. You can neither blame anyone nor yourself. Even if, you blame yourself, think you are not doing good for you. Love yourself, not blame.
Whatever we will do, only we are responsible and creator for it. Mind it. You can neither blame anyone nor yourself. Even if, you blame yourself, think you are not doing good for you. Love yourself, not blame.
Once in a while I still do this, but it was a big problem when I was younger. I obsessed on everything! Remember you won't get out of this alive. Relax and enjoy the beauty. I think really knowing your inner self helps. You have to take responsibilty for what is in YOUR control (relationships for instance) and realize which things are not in your control.
There are a lot of things out of your control, and you must not beat yourself up for these things. There is enough shit that is under your own control to worry about. Let Obama worry about why your credit card rate got jacked up almost triple, when all of the payments where on time.
There are a lot of things out of your control, and you must not beat yourself up for these things. There is enough shit that is under your own control to worry about. Let Obama worry about why your credit card rate got jacked up almost triple, when all of the payments where on time.
What you say is 100% true, QP, but it is easier said then done. No matter how many times they hear something, sometimes people need to come to these conclusions on their own.
Because boy, would I ever like to learn how to actively apply that wisdom.
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- Nov 12, 2008
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Ditto.
It's impulsive for me to blame myself. Interestingly enough though, I don't actually say to myself "it's my fault". I just end up having feelings related to it being my fault, and I end up acting like it is my fault. Thus I don't realise what I am doing until a long while later, someone ends up telling me that I am needlessly beating myself up. After that I can begin to smack myself out of it.
Same here. I don't do it consciously. For the most part, I don't think I ever actively go about labeling any of my emotions unless circumstances call for it, or I'm forced to reflect.
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Yes, the difference between "knowing" something and "feeling" it. That's a hard one to separate. The NF in us tends to dismiss what the logicial mind tells us sometimes. We go on Ni so much, we don't trust the thinking part of our mind.