Biggest Source of Frustration as an INFJ | INFJ Forum

Biggest Source of Frustration as an INFJ

Discussion in 'The INFJ Typology' started by AntoniaDodge, Apr 16, 2009.

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  1. AntoniaDodge

    AntoniaDodge Regular Poster

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    What is the greatest source of pain and/or frustration in an INFJ's personal and/or professional life?
     
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  2. Dutch Cake

    Dutch Cake Community Member

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    Verbalizing my point of view. I feel awkward most of the time. Writing is easier, but not always.
     
  3. Satya

    Satya C'est la vie
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    Avoidance.

    INFJs are highly calculating when it comes to effort. They usually contemplate beforehand how much effort a task is going to take and how likely they are to succeed and then they determine whether or not they care to go forward with it. As such, INFJs talk themselves out of doing things that they should do.

    Hence, INFJs who are prone to stress will get into an avoidance/stress cycle, where whenever they feel stress, they will avoid what they need to do in order to escape the stress, and this of course will eventually lead to more stress, which they will once again avoid until the stress builds to the point that it makes the INFJ physically or mentally ill.

    INFJs are also prone to feeling intense feelings about what is going on around them. For example, INFJs can feel a great deal of rage as a result of social injustice and if they avoid doing anything, then they will begin to feel a lot of frustration with the world and themselves.
     
    #3 Satya, Apr 16, 2009
    Last edited: Apr 16, 2009
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  4. Wyote

    Wyote Dad of the Ded
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    Very, very true Satya.
     
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  5. OP
    AntoniaDodge

    AntoniaDodge Regular Poster

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    This is a very considered response, Satya. I appreciate it.

    What do you find are the most frequent triggers of stress?
     
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  6. Wyote

    Wyote Dad of the Ded
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    Sudden shifts... rapid drastic changes... unexpected events... those sorts of things make me all kinds of tense and stressed. Things that disrupt my percieved future are generally upsetting to me, though I do seem to bounce back quickly in most cases.

    An accumulation of little things can become a big stressor, which I think is what Satya was talking about... it occurs after a period of avoidance of various things.

    Which reminds me of the importance of being pro-active thread. Ah, I am piecing together some good self therapy here.
     
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    #6 Wyote, Apr 16, 2009
    Last edited: Apr 16, 2009
  7. Satya

    Satya C'est la vie
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    I think Wyote covered it pretty well.
     
  8. IndigoSensor

    IndigoSensor Product Obtained
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    Ditto.

    Also being around anyone that is making fun or, or causing other people disconfort. I invaraibly feel it as well.
     
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  9. Virgoess

    Virgoess Regular Poster

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    People to connect with is my biggest frustration. I've found what I need and want in friendships and relationships - is in short supply. That is depth.

    As I journey through life often I see only fragments of people peeking out behind their walls in my day to day interactions. Its so frustrating. I think our culture (United States) also strongly encourages a lack of depth. Keeping people fixated on Paris Hilton allows people to make money.

    I need more than discussion of Britney Spears and who's hot in People Magazine.
     
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  10. Wyote

    Wyote Dad of the Ded
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    AMEN!
     
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  11. rainrise

    rainrise Community Member

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    to be so naturally in tune with seeking the meaning of life and delving deeper (rarely ever taking anything at face value) that we may never feel satiated or at peace in the present as our focus is primarily in the future, bringing the unconscious into light.
    when we reach a milestone or when an anticipated event is already coming into being, we are already looking forth to future implications of it or fitting it into the larger context of our life. for me, this makes me rather unexcitable and somewhat barred from simple pleasures.
    though we may have an innate sense of certainty, Ni is not concrete. intense and rewarding as it may be, it always leaves me with a sense of something hidden, something pending. i'm not sure of other INFJs, but i find that much of what i intuit is negative and quite often i find myself in a state of pending doom.
     
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  12. rainrise

    rainrise Community Member

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    YES. i frequently do not what to do when other girls discuss celebrity gossip, who's hot on campus, the clothes they want, makeup, hair...etc. i don't have anything against topics like those, in fact sometimes they are interesting, but i have such a lack of focus on those areas that it's really very draining a conversation to sit through.
     
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  13. slant

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    Suggestion: Deliberately torture the girls who talk like that by questioning why they think what they think and proving their thoughts faulty. 98.3% of the time they won't understand they've just been outsmarted.
     
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  14. Bored Now

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    My biggest source of frustration are my impossibly high standards. I really need to *get over* myself. Where do I get off?
     
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  15. Stephanie

    Stephanie Regular Poster

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    I actually have a friend who is so wonderful to talk to about intricate and intellectual things, and she literally refuses to engage most of the time. She hates that deep connection that I long for myself . . . that is frustrating.

    I also get frustrated when I figure something out, and know what I'm saying is right and/or more efficient and no one listens to me, and then fifteen minutes later they finally figure it out and don't learn from it!! (i.e. they still don't listen to me in the future!)
     
  16. Liv

    Liv Community Member

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    I can actually relate to the majority of yere frustrations...spot on actually!
     
  17. OP
    AntoniaDodge

    AntoniaDodge Regular Poster

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    I truly appreciate everyone's responses. Thank you!

    Most of these focus on frustrations. Can you think of things that feel INFJ-centric that are causes of pain?
     
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  18. Nickyrd2

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    HA I love doing that. But then sometimes they never catch on, that's my biggest frustration, When i finally decide to open up to someone and they can't see it on my level.
     
  19. gloomy-optimist

    gloomy-optimist Used to live here

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    Isolation, I'd say. I have this huge frustration with connecting with people and distancing myself from them, and it's often as if I'm alone in the way I think or feel or perceive things, even if there are others around me. This happens especially when I don't have a support system of at least one really good friend.

    And life sucks if I don't.
     
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  20. Stephanie

    Stephanie Regular Poster

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    My frustrations cause me pain. Sometimes I get so frustrated that my heart actually starts to ache. Often watching the news or hearing really sad tales will also cause physical pain, I call it a "heart-wrenching" feeling, because that's the only way I can think to describe it. It hurts my heart. (my 4th chakra)

    In example, just recently I was so frustrated with some things (mostly just wanting to understand things happening and wanting some real answers) that I was laying in bed one night curled up in pain, though not truly a physical kind, and I just never wanted to get up again, but I almost wanted to feel real physical pain that I could truly explain. . . I'm not sure I'm making much sense of things today. Huh.:m075:
     
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