Anyone met a Twin Flame?
- Thread starter David Nelson
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I've nothing but pity for you and sympathy for her. You're going through misery and have a long long road ahead, and honestly I'm not sure you've enough time in your life to finish it well.
What are your thoughts about the future?
Like say, if you feel around with your intuition. What do you see? what possibilities do you imagine?
I ask because the current situation doesn't seem to be doing you much good. And maybe laying groundwork for a better tomorrow in the meanwhile could amount to something good someday.
- Sep 28, 2008
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It really is, yea. I'm annoyed. That's why I replied.
My fault for still believing you'd absorb anything anyone else said though.
What have I not absorbed which is definitely true? Please enlighten me!
- Sep 28, 2008
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I can't. Aren't you even reading what I'm saying? wtf, you are disturbed!!
Did you look into seeing if there was a Facebook group or any other similar thing about twin flames and dedicated to that topic?
I remember you stating earlier in this thread that you were only looking for people who had similar experiences or to discuss it - but even some of us who feel we had similar experiences but didn't end up seeing it as "twin flames" have not really satisfied what you are looking for.
I just think that you probably aren't going to find what you are looking for here, and instead you are investing a lot of energy in maybe stating your case, but it is clear that nobody is going to see it the way you see it that is currently here.
So I'm wondering if this is productive, or what you are getting out of this exchange. I see that it is very frustrating in many ways and you are not getting what you were hoping to find- surely you can find what you are looking for?
Oh cool. It's reassuring to know that you also think force, coercion, and disrespect of choices are disturbing. Nice.
Hard one but sure I’ve thought a lot about this. Given age gap, if she was struggling with TF bond (and not just me), then possibly close friendship. Brief romance, who knows. Can’t see long term for her due to age gap. And of course age gap could be her main block if she does feel the TF thing. That’s her choice, but it could still be a regret of hers. If not TF or she feels only negatively about me, obvs nothing.
My own situation is I need to stabilise and get on with my projects. This won’t be easy. Not sure at present. If you haven’t been through this you can’t really understand as I keep saying, but some think they know it all. Some have grand sweeping wisdom lol
I watch YT videos and read comments on there. Lots of info there. Some on Quora as well. Not really into Facebook. But yes, this thread isn’t best, just someone posted and I responded.
I meant possible futures beyond TF. I'm not sure about you but when I like to 'feel out' my possible futures, it's never a singular future that appears in my mind. There are many ways things could go and it's up to me to sort out my path. If it's not like that for you then my apologies for assuming otherwise.
I have said to have been through something like it and 'walked with' others who have as well. However, I feel that's irrelevant here because I am a much different person than you and even if it was the same way, we handled it so very different as to make comparison moot.
The people I knew who were going through something similar, yes it was incapacitating. I totally believe that you need to stabilise things and that that's easier said than done.
Do you have dependents or day-to-day responsibilities? While I can't say it would for you, for me this sometimes keeps me regular and forced to stay on top of things.
I didn’t misrepresent you as minitoot did of me, so your point is moot. Such a response also avoids answering my valid question. It was partly rhetorical though, because nothing you know for certain about my situation. I know all the possibilities you are assuming or suggesting, and I know they could be true. I’m not assuming anything, it’s you that is.
Fortunately I live alone with no kids. I am self employed and while on low pay I have no mortgage, so can get by fairly easily. Possibly this doesn’t help, as it allows lots of overthinking and procrastinating time, typical INFJ things.
On a practical note, I do plan to start getting into art, something I have been meaning to for years. I also want to get back into music, synths and guitar stuff, again not done for a while. Plenty of other stuff needs doing as well.
I actually find the idea of exploring dating really weird at this point, even more so than normal. Online dating sounds buggered according to the web. Being Ni Dom not so good at seeing options like an Ne Dom would. Ni seek one true optimum path, which can be limiting.
My main impetus for joining this thread was to protect women and people I know nothing about from insistent interpretations pulled from thin air. But I do understand that not everything is part of the scope of my existence, including this twin flame bit.
People always choose their own suffering.
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@David Nelson - it's good that you're not "forcing" anything. That's important. Very important.
If you are lingering in this twin flame theory in the attempt to make sense of the intensity of your emotions in spite of them being fruitless, that's fine as a coping mechanism, provided, that the lives of the people involved in your situation are not detrimentally affected. But people asking to change schedules on clubs; you being pulled aside to discuss the subject matter---- these are not signs of healthy mental states, twin flame discussion or not.
In any case, as I am not a Twin Flame expert, then I shall leave you to your space to ogle back and forth within your head about it.
I would still think it's moot though, because it seems that by your reality, she isn't in your life anymore nor is she keen to be in it.
Au revoir!
People always choose their own suffering.
...
@David Nelson - it's good that you're not "forcing" anything. That's important. Very important.
If you are lingering in this twin flame theory in the attempt to make sense of the intensity of your emotions in spite of them being fruitless, that's fine as a coping mechanism, provided, that the lives of the people involved in your situation are not detrimentally affected. But people asking to change schedules on clubs; you being pulled aside to discuss the subject matter---- these are not signs of healthy mental states, twin flame discussion or not.
In any case, as I am not a Twin Flame expert, then I shall leave you to your space to ogle back and forth within your head about it.
I would still think it's moot though, because it seems that by your reality, she isn't in your life anymore nor is she keen to be in it.
Au revoir!
- Sep 28, 2008
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In order for your question to be valid, you have to make sense in the first place
And yet, you're so certain of me and mine as well as you and your own
Case and point
Mmmm fortunately. That is a two-way street. On the one side we need space to figure things out when we're hurting. On the other it's way too easy to fall into a habit of self-rumination and excessive navel-gazing tends to rot our souls.
Arts and music are very healthy for self-expression. I very much recommend you jump into them again!
Would you consider volunteering for local charities? I don't know what's about where you live... something like, Habitats For Humanity always seemed appealing to me. I mention it because, if there's much on my mind or hurting, tending my garden helps me balance and gain perspective while also creating something good.
(but you didn't feel like a gardener so I suggested houses)
- Sep 28, 2008
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The fact that my original reply triggered you so much basically tells anyone anything they need to know.
You can live in these delusions and justify away anything that doesn't align with your own agenda.
I really don't care, what I care about is this other person who you are clearly obsessed with on some kind of level.
Obsession is a dangerous and slippery slope.
You want to use Twin Flame as an excuse to justify your own feelings, which can easily become actions.
This is extremely dangerous and I'm not gonna just sit around and placate you like what you are doing is acceptable because it's some spiritual woowoo.
You are playing with somebody's life. Take it seriously.
You can live in these delusions and justify away anything that doesn't align with your own agenda.
I really don't care, what I care about is this other person who you are clearly obsessed with on some kind of level.
Obsession is a dangerous and slippery slope.
You want to use Twin Flame as an excuse to justify your own feelings, which can easily become actions.
This is extremely dangerous and I'm not gonna just sit around and placate you like what you are doing is acceptable because it's some spiritual woowoo.
You are playing with somebody's life. Take it seriously.
I totally get your point here, but have you seen the film Good Will Hunting? Matt Damon’s character goes through mountains of grief because he can’t face his demon(s). If we left out the final few scenes, we would assume he was beyond hope and had mental issues which couldn’t be addressed.
If she was annoyed at me texting her and what I said, isn’t it entirely possible that she wants revenge by causing me trouble? Maybe I even hit a nerve in my text(s), causing her great anger? Could it also be possible that she liked me before these texts and her anger is because she is upset at me? Or she likes me and can’t deal with seeing me at the club because of this? All possible.
The guy pulling me aside to discuss the issue only knows what she has told him. So the possible errors there are huge. He’s just trying to smooth things over in his role.
So your assumption the negative responses of others must be completely my fault is dangerous and highly simplistic. People are often complex and your simplistic assumptions are dangerous imo but sadly all too common.
People take advantage of others via simplistic assumptions like you are making.This happens in all areas of life. Poor communication is a good way to do that.
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But what actions have I taken since her text? [I felt very responsible for her discomfort.] Only a text via a third party aimed at making her feel better. I’m not trying to justify my actions, merely understand my feelings and thoughts.
I can see now why many got triggered about her discomfort. Bit this is all part of relationships and communications. Her age does make me look bad obvs.
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Oh yeah, it's just way complex you see.
Very complicated how she has not spoken to you and avoided you.
Very complicated how she has not spoken to you and avoided you.
Possibility. Possible. Possible.
That means the other half of the possibility remains, which are: No. No she doesn't think of you. No she doesn't miss you. It could also be a yes, as in: yes, she is afraid of you and yes she is bothered by you.
Your wishes are not the authority of determining the facts in this so it is very dangerous for you to craft your mind's truths according to those wishes, which are only yours and quite clearly not hers.
Your uncertainty maintains that the other side of the coin is equally possible.
Your optimism that it could be something positive is only registering as desperation at this point.