I met a guy once that I think was an infj, but I'm not sure. We were both temps working at the same office. Here are a couple things I remember about him:
He was distant or standoffish, but at times would say odd things during group meetings as if to call attention to himself. It seemed to me that he wasn't comfortable with the attention but he was forcing himself in order to project a certain persona.
Kept to himself a lot and always had a book in his hand.
He was tall and gangly, and he had a very peculiar and effeminate way of acting. The others in the office thought he was gay. You could say that's like a classic example of the 'dramatic' infj.
Majored in English, but zoomed through his bachelors in under three years with a not so stellar GPA, which he didn't care much about. Just wanted to get it done and get out into the world.
Chatting on IM, he was VERY scrupulous about using correct punctuation and capitalization. Wrote in a fancy, overwrought prose style. I mean he wrote full sentences which often looked like they'd been lifted from a novel. So he had literary aspirations - a dead ringer for INfJ? - but he also seemed unconcerned with context and how he came across to people.
He was arrogant and ostentatious about his talents. Another time I said somewhat tongue-in-cheek that he could be the next Steve Jobs, and his reply was an unselfconscious "Yes, I could be."
I got the sense that he was putting on an a**hole persona to fit with what his idea of how a writer should be.
But the real reason I remember him so well is because of an INSULT he said to me while we were chatting over IM. I was bored at work, and casually joked that I would rather become an escort than be sitting here doing data entry - at least I'd be making more. His reply was a sarcastic "oh (my name) You're not worldly enough to be a high class escort. I know several escorts personally and you would never fit in." I was so mad! Mad and hurt because he seemed to have seen through to my core of insecurities despite how I well I thought I hid it. I shot him down by saying "At least I don't pretend to be drunk after one beer, just to fit in" petty, i know, but that seemed to shut him up for awhile. lol.
Another time i was on the topic of masks and facades that people wear to hide their true selves. He rebutted with "No, people don't wear masks. The outer self is no less authentic than the inner one." It was something along those lines, I don't remember. But it upset me because it seemed like he was being contrary for contrary's sake, just to one-up me. I think the deep down truth was that I don't like to be told I'm wrong about things that I believe I know well. worst of all was that I saw the truth in his statement!
But he had a softer side, apparently, according to another co worker that got close to him once.
From what I know he's in Japan right now, teaching English.
Anyway, based on what little I've provided, does anyone think he sounds like an infj? It's possible not every infj is the good hearted Samaritan type you normally associate with the type. This guy was prickly and arrogant, but there was no doubt he thought about stuff in a way that I'd assume only infjs do. Could he be an immature infj?
He was distant or standoffish, but at times would say odd things during group meetings as if to call attention to himself. It seemed to me that he wasn't comfortable with the attention but he was forcing himself in order to project a certain persona.
Kept to himself a lot and always had a book in his hand.
He was tall and gangly, and he had a very peculiar and effeminate way of acting. The others in the office thought he was gay. You could say that's like a classic example of the 'dramatic' infj.
Majored in English, but zoomed through his bachelors in under three years with a not so stellar GPA, which he didn't care much about. Just wanted to get it done and get out into the world.
Chatting on IM, he was VERY scrupulous about using correct punctuation and capitalization. Wrote in a fancy, overwrought prose style. I mean he wrote full sentences which often looked like they'd been lifted from a novel. So he had literary aspirations - a dead ringer for INfJ? - but he also seemed unconcerned with context and how he came across to people.
He was arrogant and ostentatious about his talents. Another time I said somewhat tongue-in-cheek that he could be the next Steve Jobs, and his reply was an unselfconscious "Yes, I could be."
I got the sense that he was putting on an a**hole persona to fit with what his idea of how a writer should be.
But the real reason I remember him so well is because of an INSULT he said to me while we were chatting over IM. I was bored at work, and casually joked that I would rather become an escort than be sitting here doing data entry - at least I'd be making more. His reply was a sarcastic "oh (my name) You're not worldly enough to be a high class escort. I know several escorts personally and you would never fit in." I was so mad! Mad and hurt because he seemed to have seen through to my core of insecurities despite how I well I thought I hid it. I shot him down by saying "At least I don't pretend to be drunk after one beer, just to fit in" petty, i know, but that seemed to shut him up for awhile. lol.
Another time i was on the topic of masks and facades that people wear to hide their true selves. He rebutted with "No, people don't wear masks. The outer self is no less authentic than the inner one." It was something along those lines, I don't remember. But it upset me because it seemed like he was being contrary for contrary's sake, just to one-up me. I think the deep down truth was that I don't like to be told I'm wrong about things that I believe I know well. worst of all was that I saw the truth in his statement!
But he had a softer side, apparently, according to another co worker that got close to him once.
From what I know he's in Japan right now, teaching English.
Anyway, based on what little I've provided, does anyone think he sounds like an infj? It's possible not every infj is the good hearted Samaritan type you normally associate with the type. This guy was prickly and arrogant, but there was no doubt he thought about stuff in a way that I'd assume only infjs do. Could he be an immature infj?
