When people do things you just can't figure out.... how to let it go.

I understand what you mean, and as INFJs have the tendency to shell themselves from the world, as a means of connection... YOU need to stand up, if no one else will. You need to say what is wrong, and while it most likely not be well received, hopefully someone will see what you are doing, they will stand up and continue the fight.

If not? Find something else to absorb your time, it's hard for myself at least to just let go of something.

 

As I see it, this dishonesty is not limited to personal relationships. Look to business and politics to see the role model for dishonesty. I try to be in the world but not of the world but it is very hard to do when you see the harm caused by dishonesty. That is the main reason I signed up for this site, to find others who see the patterns in the world today and hopefully get a little wisdom and understanding when things are just too much to bear.

 

What really gets to me is the rudeness of it. It's like they don't have the decency to tell people they care about what's going on.

I suppose the only thing to do is do it yourself, if no one else will. And no one else will, I think...

 

A rant it is... but not without merit. I have found myself in similar situations, and I understand your frustration in dealing with it. You have every right to not want to be stuck in the middle of these situation, though if you have an intuitive personality, you ultimately get stuck there even before they put you there. Simply practice recognizing that these situation are NOT your problem to deal with. Express again to those people that you do not want to be involved, and to not come to you with these problems. If they continue, you can either be present during there rant, but practice disassociating yourself mentally. Or simply walk away. Ive had to do that to people in the past. I felt guilty, but ultimately saved myself the guilt of feeling I should do something about THEIR situation. Alternative, you can be brutally honest. Express your empathy toward the ones getting "screwed over", but try not to get suck into to feeling you have to help them. As for those hurting other people, express to them that you feel what they are doing is wrong and state that you will not associate with them while they are committing these actions.

I have an intuitive personality as well, and Im constantly burdened with intuitive thoughts. On top of that, people saw my as the person they could dump all there problems on. In the end, I felt compelled to help, and wound up spending more time dealing with other peoples problems then I was my own. It ended with me cutting off most contact from these people and have slowly reconnected, but immediate cut it if they start "dumping" on me again. Sounds harsh, but it works

 

I can totally relate.

Not sure of a fool-proof solution to problems like these other than to practice your "P" side for a while (it's healthy, try it!) and live in the present moment for YOURSELF for a day or so, away from the situations you have no control over. I find it very refreshing of a thing to do, though sometimes I worry that I am simply running away from a problem. But if its an unsolvable problem, or a problem that isn't your own, then is that so bad?

We are by nature very intelligent beings when it comes to understanding problems, so it shouldn't be too hard for an INFJ to accurately see when a problem is unsolveable and when it isn't worth the effort to invest in. So don't be afraid of second guessing yourself should you take the "P" approach to these things.