What's your method for reaching out? | INFJ Forum

What's your method for reaching out?

Chessie

Chessie

Community Member
Apr 5, 2010
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MBTI
INfJ
I'm gonna say it.

I'm lonely.

Fuck.

This isn't a particularly unusual thing. I'm an INFJ. I'm a bit out there but it takes effort tolerate other people because they just leak emotions everywhere! I've found myself isolating the last few months and I'm just not enjoying it. I had a particularly unpleasant breakup and didn't realize until later on just how bad my former partner had been for my self-esteem. Hyper-criticism will do that.

Now I'm having a tough time remembering how to get back on the horse. It's been a while since I actually made the effort to run around and be social, much less seek emotional connections. I'm half scared to!

Another INFJ would be nice but damned if I know how to go about finding one. In case you haven't noticed we're kinda rare! Still, wouldn't it be nice if there were just a little local culture of us?

What are your methods for reconnecting with the world after you've been hiding for a while?
 
I reach out by engaging in volunteer work and the like (occasionally a fitness class, book club, etc.), though I usually don't make any long term friends while I'm at it... I suppose I'm not the best at friendships. It does, however, make me feel substantially happier.

I feel blessed to have the one good friend I do - step out of your comfort zone and you'll make connections.
 
I explode my interests and abilities into something tangible. This usually translates into volunteer work, organizing projects at school, finding groups via meetup.com, and forums.

Usually take baby steps at first, just to reacclimate myself to high levels of activity.

Edit: I've also dug up articles on Scientificamerican.com, browsed general fields on Wikipedia to get a basic understanding of how things work, then call around and shadow practitioners in my area. Excellent way to get out of the house, make connections that might be useful later, and explore interests.
 
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I take a class.
Get involved in volunteer work, I volunteered at a little local theater once painting stages, ushering, etc. and had a ball.
Spend time with current friends and meet their friends to expand my friend circle.
Read the local paper to find out what kind of social things are going on around town and get involved in the ones that I like to do.
Take on a short term job.
 
A short term job couldn't hurt. I'm hearing a lot about volunteer work and considering how thoroughly INFJ's (myself included) get off on helping people that might be worthwhile. Keep'em coming!
 
Use the empathy to your advantage. Become a counselor or an advisor. Work with an organization which needs your skills and talents. Connect with people through your interests and hobbies.
 
I get my friends to introduce me to their friends and go from there I guess, though rarely will this happen.
 
I would suggest you to find new hobbies, that worked out for me. I started taking swim classes and cook clases, so I spend time with other people who enjoy the same things that I do and it is easy to talk with them since we share a common interest. Good luck! :)
 
school and sports. I need an activity other than partying and doing drugs to engage with people. Socializing with sober people is a wonderful thing. =)
 
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