Trouble socializing? | Page 2 | INFJ Forum

Trouble socializing?

I, like so many of y'all, ..have the same 'problem' as well. I can socialize and turn into an extrovert, but only for a few hours at most before I become ultra-withdrawn/ easily angered.

I always find myself needing days of alone time if I am to go to a big social event. For a time I even used certain substances to ease going to clubs/dance parties with my extroverted friends. I've stopped doing that though and find it hard to relate to people now...

It's not that I'm boring or uninteresting. People that know me well say that I'm the coolest/most interesting person they've ever met. I really think it's a matter of me having to conform to an extroverted society! I love socializing in small 2-7 person groups of similar personalities, hell even different ones! But alas a lot of my friends have moved far away... As always seems to be the case =[

I do hope going back to school soon will resolve a lot of this. I *should* be able to find a niche there. :p
 
When I was younger (I think I was leaning towards a T when I was younger) I was very introverted. Now I get nervous when I'm at the first meeting or what not and something social and new. I've gotten better and it's mostly being a bit uneasy and I'm generally very secretive.

I can be an extrovert (In some classes in school a chatterbox haha) but deep down I'm introverted and I simply need alone time.
 
Last edited:
I understand how that feels. I have problems even posting on the internet. I too tend to be a downer at social events.


Life has a balance. The world always moves on. Enjoy the 5 year old times, the dark times, and honor the blessings of imagination. Just ask yourself...Would you want to give any of it up?
 
In fact, this sounds a lot like me.

Lately I've been feeling very ashamed of all the emotions I feel. I know they are only natural and that I shouldn't detest them so much, but I have no idea what they are rooted in, and their intensity leads me to believe I'm just being melodramatic. At the sime time, I'm not sure how I can dilute them.


I think this happens to me more when I'm especially focused on myself for one reason or another. I'm not sure why it happens. Anyway, something like that happens to me too.
 
I think this happens to me more when I'm especially focused on myself for one reason or another. I'm not sure why it happens. Anyway, something like that happens to me too.
...and me. :hug:
 
I have very much the same problem, but part of it is just being introverted. I grew up moving around all the time and my entire family just happen to be extroverts. It stands as no surprise I spent a ton of my life intentionally running from social interaction just to get a breather. I eventually learned how to handle it, though. Now it's like I just feed on the emotion of social events and being around friends. Of course, afterward, I just have to crash and recharge.

But here's the big bit of information: The more I made the conscious (and extremely counter-intuitive) decision to be happy/content, the easier it was for me to just be social.

Now if I could just get myself to open up and trust my friends people might just think I'm an extrovert. It'll be like a spy movie, only psychological.
 
But here's the big bit of information: The more I made the conscious (and extremely counter-intuitive) decision to be happy/content, the easier it was for me to just be social.

That's nice to know. I think I'm getting a little better at that in my old age. :m056: Monkeys are addictive, aren't they? I suddenly got hooked. Anyway, I still like our not too happy-go-lucky side too, of course. I always think about a depressed friend of mine... he is one of the most honest, insightful people I know about some of the political/social issues in the world I think because he isn't afraid to be honest about negative things other people don't psychologically want to deal with. Hmm, I never thought about what type he is.

Now if I could just get myself to open up and trust my friends people might just think I'm an extrovert. It'll be like a spy movie, only psychological.

hehe :ms::nod: Good luck!
 
Socializing is an issue yes. But I think it's more of a time issue. I started uni 2 months ago and while most people have caught on to all the social events and meeting up at the right places and doing things and such, I'm still at the "Hi, my name is..." stage, even though everyone else is long gone from that. I know that I am a good friend to people who are my friends. I know that I have the things that make me an alright person. The fact that I have trouble socializing is just that I move at a much slower speed then everyone else in that respect. People WILL see my good qualities and I'll make some good friends but it takes a lot longer because of my introversion and the dynamics that involves.