To Sorority or Not? | INFJ Forum

To Sorority or Not?

littlexxghost

littlexxghost

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Oct 18, 2016
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I have an interest in joining a sorority but I dont know if its for pure curiosity or how well my friends have talked about them. A part of me feels like it would be draining, but I want to look like I accomplished something other than just getting good grades in my undergrad. Plus I won't know anyone when I transfer schools and I want to get out of my shell a little.

I'm not asking anyone to tell me what to do, but I would like to see if anyone has had experience with sororities or fraternities.
 
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No personal experience, but from the people I met that were in them, they had a really good time. It will depend heavily on which one you join though, so make sure it is a good fit.

But yeah, that will definitely get you out of your shell.
 
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Disgusting lot, I burn them at the stake on weekends.
 
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So, the actual response.. I'm not a big fan of either and/or I haven't had many good experiences with said groups/organizations. I also think as an INFP the idea of conformity at that level grates on my soul.

I'd imagine it would really depend on where you are/who you're with. I personally found a lot of sorority stuffs to be disingenuous and catty -- one of my best friends (who's quite social) would cry a lot because she felt really alone whenever she was in them (facade friendships and what not). That said, she ultimately made one or two good friends out of it. My sister had some bad experiences as well, but got out of it pretty early.

Frats aren't any better, but I feel like I don't need to describe them with all the good news coverage. Also their parties are awful, yuck

This is just first/secondhand account sort of stuff.
(just wanted to note that...as such...it's really not indicative of much of anything)
 
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Go Cubs Go!
 
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I did. I was a total awkward. The worst. But I wanted to see if I could get into the most exclusive sorority with the prettiest girls at my large mid-west university. Rush was degrading and required thousands of dollars worth of clothing. It was surreal. I got in. And then dropped out before the end of the semester. I was so relieved to never see anyone in that scene again. It's a weird chapter in my life (no pun intended). It's hard for me to even understand why I did it. I think I liked the idea that if I only wore the right clothing and hung out with the right people, I would finally have friends, lots of them. If sororities in general are anything like the one I experienced, I don't recommend joining one if you value things like authenticity and literacy. If you want to live with other people and make friends, join a co-op.
 
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I have no experience with sororities and fraternities except running from frat boys when they tried to attack friends and I when we were in our teen and 20's, and fighting them in self defense a few times. They were predators with a gang mentality and picking on interesting looking people was a sport.

My only friend who was in a sorority was the type who always wanted to be in with the cool kids and 'belong'. She had strong friendships with her sorority sisters and they shared a 'secret code' nobody else was in on, which was cool to observe.

I'm not saying all people in fraternities and sororities are like this, or that you are like any of these people, but I think you would come to know some people like this. Do your research and make sure you join a positive, supportive sisterhood.
 
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I did it to help me learn how to develop my social skills and see if I could make new friends different than me. I approached it like any other training program one would take to further their development.
I have to say it was an amazing experience full of allllll of the things an INFJ would normally not do...and it helped me get out of my shell and expanded my world.
I admit there was a lot of tedious nonsense that had no bearing on the 'real' world. But it DID expand my awareness of others - especially my knowledge of diversity - and encouraged me to develop new skills.
I met some wonderful people too....especially one of the greatest loves of my long lifetime.
As I recall...the particular sorority I joined approached me to join them claiming their main emphasis was on making good grades and being a member of the community in service. It did contain that and much much more. For example I was asked to be on the Stage Crew back when our university used to host big names in music. What a trip! You're probably way too young to recognize any of their names....but suffice it say I got a chance to see the performers as they really were back stage...and boy did that open my eyes.
Anyway.... I invite you to look at the sorority in question to see where it might help you in your growth and development and to help you bloom.
I wish you success!
Namaste'
 
Kgal said:
I did it to help me learn how to develop my social skills and see if I could make new friends different than me. I approached it like any other training program one would take to further their development.
I have to say it was an amazing experience full of allllll of the things an INFJ would normally not do...and it helped me get out of my shell and expanded my world.
I admit there was a lot of tedious nonsense that had no bearing on the 'real' world. But it DID expand my awareness of others - especially my knowledge of diversity - and encouraged me to develop new skills.
I met some wonderful people too....especially one of the greatest loves of my long lifetime.
As I recall...the particular sorority I joined approached me to join them claiming their main emphasis was on making good grades and being a member of the community in service. It did contain that and much much more. For example I was asked to be on the Stage Crew back when our university used to host big names in music. What a trip! You're probably way too young to recognize any of their names....but suffice it say I got a chance to see the performers as they really were back stage...and boy did that open my eyes.
Anyway.... I invite you to look at the sorority in question to see where it might help you in your growth and development and to help you bloom.
I wish you success!
Namaste'
Click to expand...


I agree with the others at some level, but I love your message! I might take the opportunity to join one for the learning experience. I do like to come out of my shell to see what I am capable of.
 
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Hm, well we don't have sororites/fraternities over here so the only experience I have is from movies. And so my main advice to you is not to join the mean girls sorority. It's just not worth it.
 
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