To be or not be understanding? | INFJ Forum

To be or not be understanding?

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by Gaze, Apr 15, 2010.

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  1. Gaze

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    When is it a good thing and bad thing to be understanding? Where is the line drawn between too little understanding and not enough?
     
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  2. Orion

    Orion Strength through understanding
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    Is there such thing as being too understanding?
     
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  3. TinyBubbles

    TinyBubbles anarchist

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    o_O it's like Yield said, how can you understand TOO much? if you could you'd be like God, omniscient. imo there's always a lack of understanding and that is the main reason why things go wrong :md: (not only in relationships, but in general too)
     
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  4. Roger

    Roger ...

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    Too understanding doesn't exist. I think, overact in understanding exist.

    How?See, when people tell i understand you. When they come in over confidence then it is obvious they will miss the real part of understanding. This is my thinking.

    For Not enough understanding: I have seen many people, they say i don't have enough understanding on their own or when situation comes they draw a line of it. When situation is tough or critical, you all know it will test your thinking ability. Now if you can't think properly or according to situation then how can you understand. Not possible.

    We should grow more and learn more, should try to apply our understanding we have without being hesitated. Sometimes we should throw ourselves boldly when we are total unsure about understanding, at least we can know where we don't understand.
     
  5. IndigoSensor

    IndigoSensor Product Obtained
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    It does exist, I do this. The danger of it comes when you end up never placing the blame on someone else. I derive and extract the motives of people for their actions, good or bad. If someone preforms a bad act, whether or not it effects me (but it can emotionally hurt more if it does effect me), then I will try to understand it. I try to understand why they did what they did, and what was their reasons for doing it. I have found that as I have gotten older, I realize that peoples intentions with most bad acts are not ill. Because of this I will have no right to be angry, or call them on it. The problem is this high level of understanding will cause me to forgive and allow people to get away with things that I shouldn't have. Too much understanding causes one to take on everything, and never allow the individual to express themselves when they are hurt.
     
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  6. Vulcan

    Vulcan Newbie

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    This is good stuff. In my experience, you can carry understanding too far. If you empathize with another so much so that you see things from only their own perspective, then you will be apt to feel their actions, whether good or bad, are justified. This leads the empathizer letting people get away with things that they shouldn't.

    I try, as far as possible (if it even is), to take an objective perspective outside of both my interests and those of another. I strive to look at the world from a point that considers the good of all, rather than a specific person or persons. This is not an easy task since I do this from my own subjective perspective, and one that I don't hold to be perfect or necessarily absolutely correct.
     
  7. Flavus Aquila

    Flavus Aquila Finding My Place in the Sun
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    Exactly.

    On the rare occasions, as a student, I had to enforce an aspect of discipline, it somehow seemed at the time, that enforcing discipline (calling someone out) and understanding someone who had broken rank, were opposing things.
     
  8. Ecton

    Ecton Community Member

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    The only time understanding had gotten in my way is when others have sensed my understanding, and then try to unload on me. Then its too much to take. Only a few greedy, or truly desperate, people have ever done that to me, though. Most people are just happy to be understood and share their feelings.
     
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  9. OP
    Gaze

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    Agree.
     
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  10. randomsomeone

    randomsomeone Well-known member

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    Yes, I have run into this, too.
     
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