Something unusual happened to me today | INFJ Forum

Something unusual happened to me today

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So there is a girl at work who is about 18-19 who is about 90lbs and pretty but she gives off a "rich girl" vibe. So anyway I act like a jag at work about all the time and she and her b/f who is the manager were argueing or something so I yelled "I can't work in this environment!" in a half jokeing tone. Apperently this made her think I was a dick. This was several weeks ago.

I didnt expect this reaction to be honest because I am kind of popular there for an unknown reason... so me and her have been having a kind of freindly interaction at work. So I was washing dishes and she comes by and says "you know I hated you when I first met you, but now I like you." So I didnt know what to say to that so I just said "OK, why is that?" and she related the storry that I just told above. So I dont know what she was trying to say to me or if she was venting or whatever. But I slapped her in the stomach with a wet and dirty washcloth and laughed at her. I kind of dislike her now. haha.
 
I can't blame you uber, some thoughts shouldn't be voiced.
 
I expected that by unusual, I was going to read about Rogo holding a crying old man in his arms--tears brimming in his own eyes as the man recounted tales of his sordid youth and then bequeathed his elaborate estate to Rogo with his last breath.. or some such thing.

So what? 18 year old girls don't get crushes on jerks?
 
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I think it has more to do with her having the gull to say she didn't like him at first without knowing him and assuming he cared enough to notice in the first place.
 
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I think you're right. I only took the time to skim the surface of the issue.
 
I just didnt expect myself to not like her because she said that to me is why I thought it was unusual. I usually like everyone. Her saying that seemed out of place, and I think I just dont like that she bypassed simple ettiquitte. I dont know what the proper protocol is to tell a coworker that you dont like them... but she failed at it. Maybe I dislike her cause she has bad manners.
 
uberrogo said:
I just didnt expect myself to not like her because she said that to me is why I thought it was unusual. I usually like everyone. Her saying that seemed out of place, and I think I just dont like that she bypassed simple ettiquitte. I dont know what the proper protocol is to tell a coworker that you dont like them... but she failed at it. Maybe I dislike her cause she has bad manners.
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It seems kind of silly to dislike her just because of that. People misjudge others all the time. I myself consider it better etiquette to be honest with people and would've taken it more as a compliment that she felt comfortable and was honest enough to admit her first impressions, and then acknowledge that perhaps she was wrong. Sounds like she wasn't intending any harm.
 
Black Swan said:
It seems kind of silly to dislike her just because of that. People misjudge others all the time. I myself consider it better etiquette to be honest with people and would've taken it more as a compliment that she felt comfortable and was honest enough to admit her first impressions, and then acknowledge that perhaps she was wrong. Sounds like she wasn't intending any harm.
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This maybe true, she might've benifited from not saying anything in the first place, like she could do with her initial dislike for him. There's nothing wrong in just not saying anything.
 
Black Swan said:
It seems kind of silly to dislike her just because of that. People misjudge others all the time. I myself consider it better etiquette to be honest with people and would've taken it more as a compliment that she felt comfortable and was honest enough to admit her first impressions, and then acknowledge that perhaps she was wrong. Sounds like she wasn't intending any harm.
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I agree, she had to courage to actually tell you the truth.

I don't think it's usual at all, she got the wrong impression and it changed. If anything that shows her abilities to update her views on people and your enduring personality.
 
Silently Honest said:
This maybe true, she might've benifited from not saying anything in the first place, like she could do with her initial dislike for him. There's nothing wrong in just not saying anything.
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It may have been beneficial, but it's also very possible that she thought he wouldn't take it badly because she was obviously expressing a new level of trust in their relationship by admitting to her error. Either way, I think it's important that individuals know how people first perceive them, because what we think we put out, isn't always what people see, and we may inadvertently alienate people without realizing it and then never knowing.
 
Silently Honest said:
This maybe true, she might've benifited from not saying anything in the first place, like she could do with her initial dislike for him. There's nothing wrong in just not saying anything.
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Theres something wrong for not speaking what your believe in my book.

Infact it's the american way to talk your mind. It is the kind of mind we're quickly losing to "There's nothing wrong in just not saying anything".

Political correctness and candyland fetishism (if it isn't in candy land it shouldn't be said, voiced, shown or thought about) enslaving thought... isn't it great.
 
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Black Swan said:
It may have been beneficial, but it's also very possible that she thought he wouldn't take it badly because she was obviously expressing a new level of trust in their relationship by admitting to her error. Either way, I think it's important that individuals know how people first perceive them, because what we think we put out, isn't always what people see, and we may inadvertently alienate people without realizing it and then never knowing.
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And what she put out isn't what uberrogo saw, and she may have inadvertently alienated him without realizing it, and she may never know! :lol:

EDIT: It's funny 'cause I used what you said to say the exact opposite thing. (Don't hate me!)
 
Milon said:
And what she put out isn't what uberrogo saw, and she may have inadvertently alienated him without realizing it, and she may never know! :lol:

EDIT: It's funny 'cause I used what you said to say the exact opposite thing. (Don't hate me!)
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Yes, you're very clever. But, can you alienate someone that's already alienated?? :)

Touche. :m131: I agree with your assessment. All the more reason why we should give people the benefit of the doubt and not hold grudges.
 
Naxx said:
Theres something wrong for not speaking what you believe in my book.
Infact it's the American way to talk your mind. It is the kind of mind we're quickly losing to "There's nothing wrong in just not saying anything".

Political correctness and candyland fetishism (if it isn't in candy land it shouldn't be said, voiced, shown or thought about) enslaving thought... isn't it great.
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Well that's great but this wasn't a belief she held close to her heart that had to be shared with people for there betterment, this was a person telling another person they didn't speak to much, prior information that they really could care less about. By that logic I should flick off every person that drives 35 on a 45 mph road. I'm guessing that we think in our heads for a reason.

Also, that was a format heavy post Naxx.
 
Black Swan said:
Yes, you're very clever. But, can you alienate someone that's already alienated?? :)

Touche. :m131: I agree with your assessment. All the more reason why we should give people the benefit of the doubt and not hold grudges.
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On one hand I now know that I was too rude to her at first, even though I was just being rude cause she was fucking around and not doing her job which inhibited me doing mine.... on the other hand I didnt think there was any problem in the first place and would have been completely happy feeling like we were friendly from the beginning. It is just something I will think about for awhile until the meaning of it all dawns on me.
 
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