Instead of putting words in my mouth and taking them out of context why not address the question posed in the thread instead?
relationship compatibility with other types
- Thread starter Quiet
- Start date
I haven't out any words in your mouth
You said INFJ's are too emotional
So go somewhere else then duh!
So to address [MENTION=1871]muir[/MENTION] observation let me just say I have not indicated infjs are flawed. Only that I have found that for myself "thinking" by itself is not a solution to everything and as a result I make the effort to work on "feeling". Jungs intention was to show people areas they could work on in themselves to become more "whole". It was never intended for people to use as a crutch or show they are superior to anyone else.
I'm intrigued...how is it you have been working on your feeling?
Because over on another thread this evening a poster advised you should open up your heart and you replied that if something is not there then it is simply not there
What did you mean by that? Did you mean you have no heart?????!!!!!
You are a master of spin muir. You said I said infjs are faulty. I never said that. Now you turn around and say this is about my disputing emotional levels and not the faulty comment.
Do you wish to continue?
Just becaue I indicate I feel as if I have less emotion than many people does not mean I do not recognize the value of emotion. Cold hard logical and rational thought is important but it is not all of or always the solution. I do work at attempting to find and fan feelings about subjects that interest me. Even so I cannot say its an easy process or that it has been overly prosperous for me. Therefore I still say my feelings are not immediately obvious. Finding something that does not appear to be there is not easy. Thus my comment in another thread.
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Yes they can. But perhaps your intention is to say something over and over and over again until its all people hear. To where the truth is drown out by all of the other static.
Again I NEVER SAID INFJS ARE FAULTY. THOSE ARE YOUR WORDS ALONE
You said 'INFJ's' meaning all INFJ's
It's right there in your post!
Here are your exact words:
Now you are trying to spin your way out of it
To make a decision based on someone else's relationship experience is a shallow way to approach a relationship. No one is advising anyone to do anything. We are just discussing our experience.
There's nothing wrong with getting to know someone and deciding that it didnt work. Not everyone is going to find a fulfilling relationship with the first person they try with, nor do they have to
i have lurked the intj forum in the past and decided not to join it for a number of reasons. I value my offline time far more than my online time.
i do not judge people based on my online experience. I dont assume i know the depth and complexity of any one i've met online. In my experience people behave differently online than they do in person. In my opinion, everyone is better in person, one on one. I do have Intj and Entj friends and they mean a lot to me.
Intjs, like intps and infps, take more time to get to know and connect with than extraverts like entp, enfp, or enfj and entj. There is slower period in establishing a friendship. They can be aloof and standoffish with people they arent familiar or comfortable with. I respect this, and with some paitence and time...this dynamic changes and they become in my opinion, absolutely brilliant friends, and there is quite a lot of depth, acceptance, personal growth, helpfulness, and respect in these friendships
I dare say that you are probably much more personable, polite, reasonable, empathetic, and overall kinder than you are online. if i honestly thought that you were the way you appear on this forum, i would ignore you. However, without knowing you in person....i give you the benefit of the doubt and i understand that you are more complex than any arbitary and pointless online persona, and i think of you as a person beyond the way you post.
Also, i would not judge other infjs based on your behaviour. As an infj, there is as much difference between us as similarities, as there is with all the infjs on this forum, and that i have known personally in real life.
i would also find it shallow and uncritical if someone read your posts and observed the way you interact online, and use it to make a judgement about me
Why do think he has changed from enfp to entp?
I can understand the appeal and compatibility of a healthy enfp. I would love to meet a morally conscious enfp man or woman. My 2 best friends are entp and enfp. The enfp and i get along brillianly, and i've had several amazing friendships with other enfps. I think that they find me a bit 'full on', or extreme, and dont like the way i think about and analyse everything in terms of ethics....like i have a overly responsible wet blanket vibe that dampens the mood or makes it more sinister than it has to be. I find her to be overly sensitive, illogical, and defensive, but intelligent, kind, and one of the funniest people in the world.
The Entp and i knew had a long term relationship in the past, and we are still very close....we were always had a bit of brother and sister dynamic...i understand that sounds gross and incestous lol. I have had an instant friendship with every entp ive met, i really like entps and think they are natural friends with infj...just the right maount of complement and contrast, but there is always something brother/sister and overly familar and platonic about it for me in terms of a romantic relationship.
What makes you think that infj's don't control their emotions? I am very much in control of the emotions that I share or even show. Most people have absolutely no clue that I am an emotional person. When there is a crisis in the family I am the one who has my emotions most under control. When my mother died suddenly I am the one who phoned her brother to tell him and I opened up the family business in the morning so that my dad didn't have to and I had to tell the employees and the clients. I was a robot that day. I control my emotions so that I can be as supportive and helpful to people that I care about. My brother told me that he was sadder at losing my mom but I know for a fact that that wasn't true but I keep my strong emotions to myself as to not burden anybody else with them. I am in better control of my emotions than anybody I can think of in my life, even the thinkers that I know because I control my anger much better than they do.
And in response to [MENTION=1871]muir[/MENTION] and his comments to you, of course INFJ s are faulty just like every other type has their faults. We are all flawed human beings. In my opinion our greatest strength are our biggest weaknesses all rolled up into one.
Good point about infjs controlling emotions but... do you find that out of the spot light they have a tendency to control you more than you like?
As for muir he put words in my mouth AGAIN. Regardless of your perspective right or wrong my issue is saying I said things that I never did.
I think maybe they used to but I've mostly outgrown that. I used to get despondent because I was so disappointed with people or with myself so that I would get into a negative cycle but only for short periods of time and not anymore, plus it was always in private so people didn't know. I'm French, I was brought to embrace being emotional. It was not considered a bad thing to be emotional so I accept them which means they control me less.
man I can't even fucking hang out with some of my friends without them getting all wrapped up in their own personal butthurt bubble. the women especially (don't get me wrong, one of my fondest female friends is a depressive fragile flower and I cherish her).
I tend toward girls who have a hard and rational streak because we play off each other incredibly well. Especially extroverts. I dated a girl for a short time who self-identified as an INFJ and while we never had a bad time together, there was just nothing really igniting a reaction between us. We didn't really push or pull the other at all. It was sort of like dating a mirror image of yourself: equal parts tolerable and unexciting.
muir is a major league shit-talker. Nobody believes what he's trying to insinuate about you. All that happened is you said something that he took as a personal insult and he is now using that to go on a crusade. Getting riled up about it and dragging it out won't make it stop, just recognize the argument is dumb, cede it, and move on to a discussion worthy of your time.