SH. You're a bad, bad man. I am not your hand puppet!
Put my post back da way it wuz. Pweez. Nao.
Put my post back da way it wuz. Pweez. Nao.
Platonic vs. romantic attraction
- Thread starter corvidae
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Thanks for the lesson in Naughty Manipulation, Professor Honest
I wouldn't be honest if I didn't teach you the dark ways of the force. :eyebrows:
To me, platonic is like you enjoy the other's company like a brother, a sister, an elder, etc. You are a separate entity.
A romantic attraction is when you see the other person as not like a brother, a sister, or an elder but a potential significant other.
If I find someone having peculiar features outside the norm (or what society may call good-looking or ugly), I may look at that person a few more times because they capture my attention. But that is not romantic attraction.
I think all friendships start with platonic. But as time goes by, there may be a particular friend that you develop a romantic attraction to. How is he different from other friends? For me, it's that special connection. For example, I am romantically attracted to him because he is kind, caring, genuine, considerate which are very attractive qualities, also because he understands me, we inspire each other, we have similar interests and values, we enjoy opening up to each other our thoughts and feelings, he captures my heart. If it's not reciprocated, the romantic attraction withers and it becomes platonic. If it's reciprocated, then the romantic attraction develops into an exclusive relationship in which the two people become each other's soulmates, followed by marriage where they declare to the public their commitment to each other. To me, physical intimacy is a way of expression between two soulmates committed to each other.
Oh I fall in love with all of my friends for a little while. I wouldn't say love, but infatuation. It's somewhere between platonic and romantic though. It fades, but I think I'm in love with EVERYONE when I first meet them for like three days. Its weird. But it's probably why I'm popular, I look at everyone I meet as the most fascinating person in the world.
Ancient Greeces take on 'love'...copied from the ever popular wikipedia...
Eros (ἔρως érōs) is passionate love, with sensual desire and longing. The Modern Greek word "erotas" means "(romantic) love". However, eros does not have to be sexual in nature. Eros can be interpreted as a love for someone whom you love more than the philia love of friendship. It can also apply to dating relationships as well as marriage. Plato refined his own definition. Although eros is initially felt for a person, with contemplation it becomes an appreciation of the beauty within that person, or even becomes appreciation of beauty itself. It should be noted Plato does not talk of physical attraction as a necessary part of love, hence the use of the word platonic to mean, "without physical attraction". Plato also said eros helps the soul recall knowledge of beauty, and contributes to an understanding of spiritual truth. Lovers and philosophers are all inspired to seek truth by eros. The most famous ancient work on the subject of eros is Plato's Symposium, which is a discussion among the students of Socrates on the nature of eros.
Philia (φιλία philÃa), which means friendship in modern Greek, a dispassionate virtuous love, was a concept developed by Aristotle. It includes loyalty to friends, family, and community, and requires virtue, equality and familiarity. In ancient texts, philia denoted a general type of love, used for love between family, between friends, a desire or enjoyment of an activity, as well as between lovers. This is the only other word for "love" used in the ancient text of the New Testament besides agape, but even then it is used substantially less frequently.
Agapē (ἀγάπη agápē) means "love" in modern day Greek, such as in the term s'agapo (Σ'αγαπώ), which means"I love you". In Ancient Greek it often refers to a general affection rather than the attraction suggested by "eros"; agape is used in ancient texts to denote feelings for a good meal, one's children, and the feelings for a spouse. It can be described as the feeling of being content or holding one in high regard. The verb appears in the New Testament describing, amongst other things, the relationship between Jesus and the beloved disciple. In biblical literature, its meaning and usage is illustrated by self-sacrificing, giving love to all--both friend and enemy. It is used in Matthew 22:39, "Love your neighbour as yourself," and in John 15:12, "This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you," and in 1 John 4:8, "God is love." However, the word "agape" is not always used in the New Testament in a positive sense. II Timothy 4:10 uses the word in a negative sense. The Apostle Paul writes,"For Demas hath forsaken me, having loved (agapo) this present world...." Thus the word "agape" is not always used of a divine love or the love of God. The Christian sense of the term expands the original Greek sense and encompasses a total commitment or self-sacrificial love for the thing loved. A great deal of Christian theology is indebted to the frequency of this word and its interpretation in the New Testament.
Eros (ἔρως érōs) is passionate love, with sensual desire and longing. The Modern Greek word "erotas" means "(romantic) love". However, eros does not have to be sexual in nature. Eros can be interpreted as a love for someone whom you love more than the philia love of friendship. It can also apply to dating relationships as well as marriage. Plato refined his own definition. Although eros is initially felt for a person, with contemplation it becomes an appreciation of the beauty within that person, or even becomes appreciation of beauty itself. It should be noted Plato does not talk of physical attraction as a necessary part of love, hence the use of the word platonic to mean, "without physical attraction". Plato also said eros helps the soul recall knowledge of beauty, and contributes to an understanding of spiritual truth. Lovers and philosophers are all inspired to seek truth by eros. The most famous ancient work on the subject of eros is Plato's Symposium, which is a discussion among the students of Socrates on the nature of eros.
Philia (φιλία philÃa), which means friendship in modern Greek, a dispassionate virtuous love, was a concept developed by Aristotle. It includes loyalty to friends, family, and community, and requires virtue, equality and familiarity. In ancient texts, philia denoted a general type of love, used for love between family, between friends, a desire or enjoyment of an activity, as well as between lovers. This is the only other word for "love" used in the ancient text of the New Testament besides agape, but even then it is used substantially less frequently.
Agapē (ἀγάπη agápē) means "love" in modern day Greek, such as in the term s'agapo (Σ'αγαπώ), which means"I love you". In Ancient Greek it often refers to a general affection rather than the attraction suggested by "eros"; agape is used in ancient texts to denote feelings for a good meal, one's children, and the feelings for a spouse. It can be described as the feeling of being content or holding one in high regard. The verb appears in the New Testament describing, amongst other things, the relationship between Jesus and the beloved disciple. In biblical literature, its meaning and usage is illustrated by self-sacrificing, giving love to all--both friend and enemy. It is used in Matthew 22:39, "Love your neighbour as yourself," and in John 15:12, "This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you," and in 1 John 4:8, "God is love." However, the word "agape" is not always used in the New Testament in a positive sense. II Timothy 4:10 uses the word in a negative sense. The Apostle Paul writes,"For Demas hath forsaken me, having loved (agapo) this present world...." Thus the word "agape" is not always used of a divine love or the love of God. The Christian sense of the term expands the original Greek sense and encompasses a total commitment or self-sacrificial love for the thing loved. A great deal of Christian theology is indebted to the frequency of this word and its interpretation in the New Testament.
Wow, this topic brings up a lot of confusion in me.
I don't actually get on much with people I don't know. I guess why I personally would fall in love with my friends is because I know I don't know other people that well. I am attracted to people I truly understand and know genuinely wish to understand me. Friends are like that, and I already enjoy their company...
However, if I don't know you, then how can I love you? I find it difficult to do so...
I'm confused about my sexuality now. I'm naturally straight, asexual towards "outsiders," and basically pansexual to those that get close to me :/
I don't actually get on much with people I don't know. I guess why I personally would fall in love with my friends is because I know I don't know other people that well. I am attracted to people I truly understand and know genuinely wish to understand me. Friends are like that, and I already enjoy their company...
However, if I don't know you, then how can I love you? I find it difficult to do so...
I'm confused about my sexuality now. I'm naturally straight, asexual towards "outsiders," and basically pansexual to those that get close to me :/
What a great topic~~
I think this thought has been on my mind for quite a while now, though subconsciously. In the future, I believe i'll end up loving my friends. I'm someone who falls in love platonically first. I don't go around thinking of guys as "potentials" all the time---I guess in a sense I still have a "little-girl" mentality. I don't like splitting guys and girls up into two groups.
So all the guy friends I have, or all guy aquaintances are people i'm friendly with with no "romantic attachments." I actually currently like a friend---quite alarming and terrible. I think it's from this experience that i've learnt my lesson. Oh well...I just don't go for shallow people.
I only have romantic interests in people I admire---intellect, character, sweetness, goodness, someone who can understand me, etc. So that really does leave my romantic interests to also be my platonic interests. I guess i'm bombed unless the "friend" starts up the relationship with a romantic thought in mind.
I think this thought has been on my mind for quite a while now, though subconsciously. In the future, I believe i'll end up loving my friends. I'm someone who falls in love platonically first. I don't go around thinking of guys as "potentials" all the time---I guess in a sense I still have a "little-girl" mentality. I don't like splitting guys and girls up into two groups.
So all the guy friends I have, or all guy aquaintances are people i'm friendly with with no "romantic attachments." I actually currently like a friend---quite alarming and terrible. I think it's from this experience that i've learnt my lesson. Oh well...I just don't go for shallow people.
I only have romantic interests in people I admire---intellect, character, sweetness, goodness, someone who can understand me, etc. So that really does leave my romantic interests to also be my platonic interests. I guess i'm bombed unless the "friend" starts up the relationship with a romantic thought in mind.
