It's similar to people fighting tooth and nail for an education, for money, for societal acceptance. The toiling doesn't seem to end. But what is it all for exactly? For the right to live?
Myers-Brigg & Dating Profiles
- Thread starter Gaze
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Humans are social animals, which means that we very easily define ourselves through respect, confusing what we are with how we are perceived. I feel like I've tried to get away from this kind of thinking all my life, but it's perhaps impossible to do, because it would mean having to sacrifice something too valuable. It may not even be possible to be totally independent and self-reliant, but if it was, it would also mean becoming self-absorbed. And also if I try to shed the shackles of education, money etc., people who do define themselves through those things often see it as disrespectful, even if it's just a personal choice without a need to judge others. I guess the more you base your identity on something, the easier it is to see another way of life as an affront.
Our needs aren't as complex as we make them out to be. Sustenance and maybe some kind of community. With education and money we're talking about wants turned into needs.
Hmmm. Maslow. I suppose we all have different interpretations of belongingness and esteem.
Yes. Do we really need it? I think humanity has a tendency to oversimplify to the point of over complication Everything seems to end in dystopia.
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"Magnificent Bastard" / Ren's Counterpart
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Love is a skill.
That's the bedroom kind of looooovvveeee.
It's also possible to try to turn needs into wants. I do think there's a need for companionship, and even if I try to convince myself it's just a want, that it can be discarded, I haven't been very successful. Yet it's not uncommon to bump into people who claim they've succeeded, that they're completely happy alone. Ah, but maybe it's because I've experienced such happiness in a relationship that no matter how happy I am on my own, I'm still aware that the potential for happiness (and for misery) is still greater when you can share your life with someone.
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"Magnificent Bastard" / Ren's Counterpart
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Well, the saying applies there too but I was talking about maintaining a relationship. It's easy to get bored of someone and then blow your retirement fund on a fast car, suits, and penthouse suite to impress nightclub air-heads.
And that's fulfilling? I thought feeding hungry kids was fulfilling.
Love is a skill of seeing the world, and your partner, in a positive way. Even when things get bad. Or especially then.
I think the need for companionship is nothing but temporary. When we consistently view ourselves as a constant part of a bigger whole, I doubt there's need for companionship. There's probably too much of it where necessarry. I'm personally more afraid of the damage that my existence will have to be accountable to but I guess we are all inevitable that way.
Love is the skill of accepting another in a positive way, with zero resentment even when we want to be off with their heads.
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"Magnificent Bastard" / Ren's Counterpart
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Yes. I personally find it more fulfilling to chop that wrist off to free the rolex. All the labor that went into one damn wrist. Inequality.
Okay, let me rephrase my point: there's a need for human connection, and in a world where people are focused on their immediate families, it's difficult to find the kind of connection that satisfies the need except by companionship. That is, we may all be constant parts of a bigger whole, but it's difficult to feel it if all your connections are shallow. Hence the need for connection leads into needing companionship. Perhaps it's not inevitable that the world should be this way.
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"Magnificent Bastard" / Ren's Counterpart
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It's a beautiful thing if you're at the top of the heap though.
Everything you want.
Some people say they do find connection. I suppose it's true. I guess I'm lucky I've found it several times but I also know that we can work on connection. I dislike my family all in all but I love them anyway. I bare myself to them even when that connection is non existent. I think we often over romanticize the idea of finding someone special when everybody within our vicinity is already special enough. I guess I believe in renovations too much.
No guilt? I've always thought successful people were more prone to sleepless nights not because they have a lot to do but because they know what they've done so far. I guess I believe too much in good conscience.
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"Magnificent Bastard" / Ren's Counterpart
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Some people only want more. It gets gross past a certain point.