INFP boyfriend (philosopher) does not believe in the subconscious or in intuition | Page 3 | INFJ Forum

INFP boyfriend (philosopher) does not believe in the subconscious or in intuition

I get narcy vibes from Artemesia in general.
Every Artemesia thread ever:
"So and so is doing something different from me and I don't like it, what's wrong with them? What's wrong with everybody? Why aren't they as great as me? Why am I so awesome? Discuss."
 
I wonder if this is an INFP trait or one associated specifically with my philosopher boyfriend. He teacher epistemology and is one of those types who, although very creative and poetic, does not believe in the subconscious, thinks that all people are basically good, and that ulterior motives in others are basically in our own minds.
Sometimes I have disagreements with him. For example, he tells me that his friends will always be there for him and that they love him etc. I tell him that if he becomes more successful, many of these male friends will grow distant from him because his success is a reminder of their own failure. He does not agree with this.

As an INFJ I am very good at detecting hidden motives in people. I know, for example, that I need to steer clear of that person because she is jealous or a gossip. I can also detect microexpressions on someone´s face which reveal true emotions. My boyfriend, being an epistemologist, believes that all of this is in my head and that their true motives are basically good.

Am I wrong in thinking that my boyfriend is naive about humans? Are INFP men in general idealistic and naive?

I had the same issue with my ex-INFP boyfriend. His basic slogan was "Life is suffering." He thought it was stupid to ponder so deeply about life, that intuition was just being judgemental. He liked to say about himself that he was a walking contradiction, but personally I saw it as he would say whatever benefited his argument. Just be careful, many INFP's have a passive aggressive streak, and instead of directly addressing something they claim their nice by handing a fake compliment they themselves do not even believe. Somehow they think lying by ommission no matter what makes them a better person. It can be very draining to hear whats not possible.
 
We need to get clear here about the definition. Are we talking about the "spiritual" intuition and subconscious, or are we talking about the "scientific" version of it? If it's the latter, let him read neuroscience. If it's the first, he might be right.
 
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If he has a PhD in philosophy, his reasons for taking such an optimistic stance must be quite profound. It appears naive as you present it because you do not delve into the paradigm that he speaks from and that forms the base of his convictions. And yet that is probably the most interesting thing to delve into.

Jesus do I always speak like that?

Didn't realise I spoke like such an academic twat. Two years perspective is really illuminating!
 
Jesus do I always speak like that?

Didn't realise I spoke like such an academic twat. Two years perspective is really illuminating!

Lol we're all twats from time to time
 
Yes

It's okay though we accept you and love you unconditionally

Idk, my love is pretty conditional.
But I do love @Ren, in all his glorious twattiness.
 
Idk, my love is pretty conditional.
But I do love @Ren, in all his glorious twattiness.
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It’s how your brain works, empaths. As you know there are two sides of your brain. Each side has some specialized areas. On one side of the brain there is a language function and is thought to also be involved in your internal Narrative. The other side does have that so it “talks” to you through what you are perceiving as intuition. Gut feelings, a sense of something. All that stuff. People can have worked to develop their natural strengths, sometimes at the expense of making weaknesses weaker. Or be balanced. Empaths have extremely talented areas of the silent brain. That’s why it feels like it comes out of no where. Creativity, flow, all that stuff- silent half. It’s a thing look it up. The original poster’s boyfriend may just not have a strong silent side and isn’t aware of it as much. Can’t conceive of it.

I’m a neuroscientist, I’m not talking out of my ass. It’s really interesting stuff. You have to read the studies where they sever the lobes for epilepsy. There’s a lady who was trying to quit smoking and if she lit up with one hand the other one would spontaneously slap it out of her mouth. No lie. Shit is fascinating.

edit for references: https://www.informit.com/articles/article.aspx?p=1409778&seqNum=2


http://greymattersjournal.com/alien-hand-syndrome/
 
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