How would you teach love?
- Thread starter just me
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Love for our fellow humankind and all associated with us, to include respecting the rights of others. I do think the love of self is an important integral part of the sphere of things to be included.
interesting question and i wont pretend to know the answer but i always liked alan watts coincidence of opposites theory. it states that opposites such as love and hate are fundamentally the same and without one the other would not exist. this is best described through examples so ill use his.
if i were to say to you i have an apple in my left hand and i have nothing in my right hand what im fundamentally referring to is the seemingly polar opposites of two seperate events, one being form or the apple the other space or nothing. yet alan suggests we are witnessing the phenomenon of the the same experience in both hands. the reason is we are not merely seeing the apple by itself, we are seeing the apple and also the space around it. in this way the two are inseperable, we wouldnt have an object without space (everything would therefore be solid or in this case, apple) and no space if we didnt have objects to differentiate it, everything would simply be space. together these two seemingly opposite possibilities are part of the same experience.
another example would be a bee and a flower. we see normally see them as two seperate organisms but as we are finding out without the bee there is no flower and no flower without the bee to pollinate it. unless of course us humans do it as ive heard is going on in china but regardless its a necessary role played by a bee that allows the whole of a greater system to continue. death allows life, you allows me, and everything in between.
so in this way we could suggest hate and love are fundamentally the same through being opposites, without the differentiation between the two, neither would exist.
What has worked for me are the teachings of Lao Tzu. "Demand nothing. Give all." So simple, yet so hard to do. Just to give everything you can without any expectation of a return on your investment. Also the Love Dare has more specific steps, like, "Love does not demand it's own way. It lets the other win."
I have to say the biggest inspiration for me to learn how to selflessly love another being was my best friend, an INTJ. He has shown me more kindness, tolerance, patience, and understanding than any human I've ever known... and for an INFJ outcast, that is BIG. I got into studying personality types just so I could understand him, forgive him, compromise with him, accommodate him, support him, and LOVE him. He is the first person who was ever gentle, sensitive, and interested enough in/with me to really unlock the best version of myself. We are NEVER unkind to one another. No arguments. Honesty. Directness. Even if I lash out in a snarky way when he unintentionally hurts me, he has never snapped back. He will apologize without even knowing the exact root of my pain. If something is too painful for me to verbalize, he doesn't force me to talk about it. He is never forceful... about anything... and he always says PLEASE, thank you, and a million other verbal/written affirmations. I have never felt so valued, appreciated or interesting. He challenges me. It is work not getting my feelings crushed & taking offense to certain insensitivities, but he's worth the effort. He's growing me into a better human. I have learned to trust. 
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QIdNdMM6xyk"]YouTube - Cloud Cult - Chain Reaction[/ame]
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