How does an INFJ show that s/he likes you? | INFJ Forum

How does an INFJ show that s/he likes you?

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Jul 2, 2009
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Hey there :)
My first thread on this here forum.

Anyway, I took the idea for this topic from an INTJ forum and I almost feel bad because of it... Almost :)

I'm interested in knowing what would an INFJ do/say that would show that s/he likes you, without simply stating it directly.

Let me quote the original post:
There can be contradictions in the list too-- INTJs are complex people.

I'll start. The format is this:
An INTJ might like you if:
...they're ignoring you on purpose.
...they're noticing your existance.
...they're being particularly nice towards you.
...they're being particularly mean to you.
...they criticize you a little too much.
...they interrupt their reading/writing/drawing/studying to talk to you.
...they pretend to be interested in the intellectually inferior interests you non-INTJ might have.
...they ask to do the Myers-Briggs test on you.
...they tell you you're probably an INTJ (a compliment of the highest order.)

Anyway... Fire away.
And feel free to elaborate.
 
Smiles, and attention. After a while, they might just try to ask you out....then you say "no", the infj falls down, picks itself back up, and goes on its merry way.
 
(Personally)

They don't show any sign of liking you beyond liking you as a person and enjoying your company, but then turn right around and send long, long e-mails about how nervous they feel around you because they're attracted to you and wanted to kiss you the whole time they were with you.

In which case, you advise them to learn to play poker and get rich, because you never saw a thing in their body language. :D
 
I'm not sure the INFJs are going to get our little INTJ inside jokes ;)

The easiest way to tell if a INTJ likes you is that they pay attention to you and show interest. We consider most things to be a waste of time lol.
 
Hmm... in my case...

Oposed to usually keeping a distance, talking ocassionally and about nothing very profound, smiling slightly in a Mona Lisa sort of way, avoiding direct or visual contact and simply being a wallflower...

I'll actually stand close to that person, talk to them often, smile honestly and wholeheartedly, seek them out, make eye contact and then shy away if gazes met... nothing overly obvious for anyone else, but when you know me, as the INFJ I am, you'd see the difference.
 
They tell you they like you.

That's the only way to go about it.
 
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if i'm interested i'll definately tell them or ask them out unless for some reason circumstances impede me from doing so (e.g. if they're already in a relationship, if they are an ESTP (i kid), if they are in Australia (i kid again))
 
I'll actually talk the person if I like them! I'll also initiate the conversation or actions towards them, which, by the way, will be meticulously planned and timed for maximum effect. I'll go into extrovert mode (limited fuel) and I'll start talking about deep things and asking loads of questions. This means I feel comfortable doing this with them, which means I am very attracted to that person.
 
Thanks guys :)
Really appreciate the input.
In my case it was pretty correct. She did, in fact, ask me out... I was gonna wait a little bit longer, but she jumped me..
You must be prophets or something :)

And what about the first few dates? What are the things I should keep my eyes open for (be it pretty good or pretty bad signs)?
 
If I talk about anything personal, it means I really like the other person. Also, I will write letters and be ultra romantic. Opening up is a really big deal, though.
 
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We try to hang around and be friendly.

We'll engage in friendly banter

We will compliment you on your apperance/behavior/etc. in a roundabout way to avoid looking like we are obviously hitting on you.

When we always come by and kindly ask you "what's wrong?".

As another person said, smiles and attention. :D
 
We approach you.

Repeatedly.
 
(Personally)

They don't show any sign of liking you beyond liking you as a person and enjoying your company, but then turn right around and send long, long e-mails about how nervous they feel around you because they're attracted to you and wanted to kiss you the whole time they were with you.

In which case, you advise them to learn to play poker and get rich, because you never saw a thing in their body language. :D

Yeah, that's right, I think. But I don't think they actually would send that e-mail :) I guess it would sit in the sketches-folder of their mail-account like - forever. But they would work gradually on the plan to eventually kiss the guy/girl.
 
If you're a guy and I'm acting like a smirking bitch to you and I make fun of you and mock you, I probably have a crush on you. Or I just have genuine contempt for you. Its hard to say.

If you're a girl and I get all tongue tied and mumble a lot and just not acting like myself what so ever, I probably like you. I'm shy with women but I'm not shy around guys. Its weird.
 
Bored now, if what you said was true to me, I guess I like the majority of the human race.


devil-smiley-074.gif





...What a terrifying thought.
 
I knew it. You book burning bitch you.

You're in love with me.


Ha, project much? There was another part to that statement. Something about genuine contempt... *grin*


And screw you, I'm so nice to you anyway. You're the one mean one here.
 
If you're a guy and I'm acting like a smirking bitch to you and I make fun of you and mock you, I probably have a crush on you. Or I just have genuine contempt for you. Its hard to say.

If you're a girl and I get all tongue tied and mumble a lot and just not acting like myself what so ever, I probably like you. I'm shy with women but I'm not shy around guys. Its weird.

i second this *nods*

i think i'm a lot more openly rough with guys...i might verbally and physically spar with you (e.g. have an argument with you just for fun, greet you with a punch, appear to openly dislike you but not all the time, etc.). i find i'm also more outgoing with men since i find it easier to place the attention on them rather than on my own emotions.

if you're a girl and i like you, i tend to be very sensitive to your feelings and over-empathize when i'm interacting with you. i'll try to make you laugh and make you smile...all the while trying to hide my shyness. also, i might avoid you as in make an effort not to notice you when i actually do...even when you notice me. its complicated...
 
This is how I usually approach a crush:

Step 1:
I ignore the object of my affection as much as possible (all the while being keenly aware of Sir Object's whereabouts). This means talking to everyone but him and looking at everyone but him (and catching glimpses of him when he's not looking)

Step 2:
Ahhh...relief. Now we're actually talking/friends (due to him approaching me...although I've been known to initiate Step 1b). Once friends, I am VERY attentive. As everyone else said, lots of smiles, laughter and eye connection. I'm intense and warm and downright demonstrative. This, of course, is when I'm unsure of whether or not there's hope of him ever noticing me in "that way."

Step 3:
This is when there might be hope of him noticing me in "that way." I revert much back to Step 1. I do everything in Step 2, but with much more blushing and diverting my gaze in a shy manner. I laugh more and show my affection by making things for the guy (homemade cards, knitted things, wildflower bouquets).

This is often very confusing for the guy (to go from distant to super friendly to reserved and shy). Ah...my wooing style...not effective at all :D