Fascination with Others

To be fascinated with someone else.

 

Hm.. I would have to say I would rather be fascinated... not necessarily infatuated, with someone than either of the vice versus. Mostly because I feel like I can be fascinated with someone at a distance and it would hopefully be almost completely internal, and something I can try to get over if it becomes unhealthy, without anyone else really knowing.

But if someone is fascinated or infatuated with me, well of course their is the uncomfortable nervous feeling I get when I'm the center of attention and it's not of my own doing. If I'm on a stage than by all means look at me, but if I'm just being, then I am trying to blend. So there's that. Also, if it's an unwanted or unreciprocated affection that I am feeling, even if I have done nothing wrong, I will feel responsible for the other persons feelings and it will make me sad, nervous and ultimately agitated. Mostly people who have been infatuated with me become very expressive and clingy, in a suffocating manner. If they were like me and distantly fascinated, I would probably never know and perhaps that wouldn't be so bad, but it is the overbearing that is the worst.

See, infatuation and even fascination tends to be done through rose colored glasses. And the person has become more of an object to wonder at than an actual human being with their flaws and imperfections, and that is where one of the many thin lines between love and ..... is formed.

 

Maybe I can't write very long and complicated texts in English, but there is always someone who will say just what I wanted, but I couldn't

 

It really depends on the person who is fascinated with me. Usually it does get old if they hang around too much I need my space. And I usually only get fascinated with dead people.

 

*reads, chokes, and dies* lol... just kidding. I'm feeling goofy.

 

I'd prefer to have someone be fascinated with me, I think. But only if it's someone I don't mind hanging around me, obviously. When I get fascinated with other people it tends to end badly for me.

 

I don't prefer either.

If I'm fascinated with someone else then I feel guilty for missing out on the moment and truly enjoying what they bring to the table. I also might end up putting them on a pedestal and this can sometimes be a problem I face in my day-to-day interactions.

If someone becomes fascinated with me and I pick up on this then it might feed into my ego and I won't recognize it until it is too late. I will admit that this effects my behaviors and I will suddenly be more aware of my next move and again, I'm losing out on just 'being'.

 

I rather be fascinated with someone than the other way around. I really don't like people being fascinated or even infatuated with me actually. Like if I think some poor fool of a person is fascinated with the likes of me, I try to change their mind. It happens kind of a lot. I'm not sure why. People keep thinking I'm interesting or something. ::shrug:: Its pretty weird.