- Nov 12, 2008
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This might get a little sensitive to some people (others might not get why this could be sensitive), but I feel this could be a good discussion.
The Ego: It is actually a rather important part of everyone for our own survival as humans. It gives us our identity, our likes, our dislikes, our reservations, our desires. A lot of it makes us who we are. Interestingly enough, if one lets their ego get just the slightest bit too big, it blinds them of said inflation and further grows. Most people see others with inflated egos as less then desirable. In some ways people with too large of egos harm society by not caring for others, or just being reckless for personal gain. It can be see in day to day life. One of the most notable effects of a too large ego, is an over-emphasized air and feeling of self-importance, and the inability of said person to see this in themselves. This is why when you tell someone "your ego is huge", they deny it, and often get wildly defensive. That defensiveness is often a flag to someone having an oversized ego. Why is that though? It's just that the ego simply does not want to die, and will hold on by any means possible, even at your own personal loss.
Having your ego is comforting. It makes you an individual; it makes you feel important, it makes you feel that you have a purpose. It is these very reasons that allow the ego to get so easily inflated, and is precisely the reason why so few people even try to keep their ego in check. If you try to beat down your own ego, it will fight you back, hard. Once you begin to fight it back, you start to feel like you are losing all of the good things you think and feel about yourself. You feel weak, unimportant, sad, directionless, worthless; this is simply ones ego minimizing down. It hurts, and is why it seems like so few people stop feeding their own ego.
Once the ego stops minimizing though, it becomes very clear in hindsight how one was acting. It's often rather surprising too. It's akin to looking at a photograph of yourself at 16 with the biker jacket, and the obligatory spiked mullet. "Was that... me?", shocking as it is, it is a comforting, and sobering feeling. Once someone has this moment, it becomes much easier to control ones ego. The signs of it stuffing its face with praise, false self-worth, and general grandiosity, become clear. It might not be comfortable at first, and not everyone can keep up with it, but it becomes easier to keep it down.
You might ask, "What is even the importance of doing this, if I don't have an ego, I won't be me". That is actually true. The flipside of an inflated ego is too small of an ego. That leads to depression, very low self of esteem, and a general feeling of being lost. Some people seem to bounce forever between these two extremes. But, is having an inflated ego any better then having none at all? I think not. I have had my own experience with an overinflated ego after I graduated high school. It got so large that it effected my personality, and inner drive at it's very core. Eventually, it became so large, that it fell in on itself very hard. It took me over a year to recover back to mostly normal. I was lucky though, I grew from this, and have been working on keeping my ego in check since this happened. My ego still tries to tempt me back into my old way, but I won't let it. It isn't easy, and sometimes a step in either wrong direction becomes a stressor. However, there is one major thing to be gained; self-improvement and being a better person, and in turn making the world a better place. In the end, isn't that what we all try to do every day of our lives? In the end, the ego is still needed, the key is trying to find a healthy ego.
Now, the question I have for you is, what are your experiences with your own ego? What are your experiences with other's egos? How do you react when you see someone with a miss-sized ego?
The Ego: It is actually a rather important part of everyone for our own survival as humans. It gives us our identity, our likes, our dislikes, our reservations, our desires. A lot of it makes us who we are. Interestingly enough, if one lets their ego get just the slightest bit too big, it blinds them of said inflation and further grows. Most people see others with inflated egos as less then desirable. In some ways people with too large of egos harm society by not caring for others, or just being reckless for personal gain. It can be see in day to day life. One of the most notable effects of a too large ego, is an over-emphasized air and feeling of self-importance, and the inability of said person to see this in themselves. This is why when you tell someone "your ego is huge", they deny it, and often get wildly defensive. That defensiveness is often a flag to someone having an oversized ego. Why is that though? It's just that the ego simply does not want to die, and will hold on by any means possible, even at your own personal loss.
Having your ego is comforting. It makes you an individual; it makes you feel important, it makes you feel that you have a purpose. It is these very reasons that allow the ego to get so easily inflated, and is precisely the reason why so few people even try to keep their ego in check. If you try to beat down your own ego, it will fight you back, hard. Once you begin to fight it back, you start to feel like you are losing all of the good things you think and feel about yourself. You feel weak, unimportant, sad, directionless, worthless; this is simply ones ego minimizing down. It hurts, and is why it seems like so few people stop feeding their own ego.
Once the ego stops minimizing though, it becomes very clear in hindsight how one was acting. It's often rather surprising too. It's akin to looking at a photograph of yourself at 16 with the biker jacket, and the obligatory spiked mullet. "Was that... me?", shocking as it is, it is a comforting, and sobering feeling. Once someone has this moment, it becomes much easier to control ones ego. The signs of it stuffing its face with praise, false self-worth, and general grandiosity, become clear. It might not be comfortable at first, and not everyone can keep up with it, but it becomes easier to keep it down.
You might ask, "What is even the importance of doing this, if I don't have an ego, I won't be me". That is actually true. The flipside of an inflated ego is too small of an ego. That leads to depression, very low self of esteem, and a general feeling of being lost. Some people seem to bounce forever between these two extremes. But, is having an inflated ego any better then having none at all? I think not. I have had my own experience with an overinflated ego after I graduated high school. It got so large that it effected my personality, and inner drive at it's very core. Eventually, it became so large, that it fell in on itself very hard. It took me over a year to recover back to mostly normal. I was lucky though, I grew from this, and have been working on keeping my ego in check since this happened. My ego still tries to tempt me back into my old way, but I won't let it. It isn't easy, and sometimes a step in either wrong direction becomes a stressor. However, there is one major thing to be gained; self-improvement and being a better person, and in turn making the world a better place. In the end, isn't that what we all try to do every day of our lives? In the end, the ego is still needed, the key is trying to find a healthy ego.
Now, the question I have for you is, what are your experiences with your own ego? What are your experiences with other's egos? How do you react when you see someone with a miss-sized ego?
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