Are you attracted to older or younger people? | Page 9 | INFJ Forum

Are you attracted to older or younger people?

It's kind of odd but I'm really interested in meeting older women . . . who've lived a full life and have a lot to teach. It's not like lust, it's way different, I guess what I'm seeking right now is a solid sort of partner to help me out as I am young, and hopefully I can give this person spiritual gifts or just even talk to them. I'm sure some dying people in the nursing homes would love it if I went there and wanted to talk. I guess many of them would be mad, but I obviously wouldn't talk to them. I guess I have trouble finding . . . (maybe, genuine is the right word?) sort of people in my age group.

Like, I can't imagine being in a good romance with anyone my age, and this is a weird feeling. Maybe I'll be one of those solo people who get old with wealth then marry a young woman and be labeled as "creepy" for the remainder of my natural life.

Man I don't know what I'm talking about. All of this forum-reading has put me in a weird sort of mood. Kind of nostalgic mixed with anxiety of the future, mixed with a great appreciation for life despite the lack of human contact. Even with this isolation - and it is absolutely self-imposed - I just do not feel truly alone, and I haven't felt alone in a very long time. I know many people do and that is so very sad.

So . . . older people. Yeah, I'm gonna just go with "older people" as my final answer.
 
It's kind of a weird question, honestly. I don't really consider age as very important until I meet a person. I've met some astoundingly wise people who were ten years old. and I guess wisdom and love are attractive to me.
 
Age(relatively speaking) has never been much of a factor when I find myself attracted to a woman. It is something more than what she physically looks like, like an inner essence. If a woman is warm and friendly, has a certain look in her eye, and is comfortable in her own skin and with her own sexuality; there's very little that is more attractive than that.
 
I'm with Jimmers on this one. That said, these days I generally end up in relationships with people older than me, or have less permanent things with people younger than me. Using the word "attracted" here makes it difficult.
 
I like older men. Too old, for the most part (for my age). It's usually 3-8yrs older, usually around 6 or 7 years. Right now the guy I secretly admire is 7.5 years older...I am sure he likes me, but once again, he thinks I am too young for him. I've got to respect him for that though. If I were a man I would be hesitant to go for it as well. Unfortunately, the school system (imo) has made age gaps into a big no no. We aren't in the same "life stage", after all...
 
20 years older.

unless the person is significantly more mature than most people their own age
 
I agree with what someone said up there. ^ It's very difficult to find a partner my age that is intellectually on my level. Age doesn't matter, but at the same time, most college aged guys lack a brain (I'm not excluding girls) so I find myself being attracted to older guys that are done with all the foolishness.
 
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I am resurrecting this old thread because it's pertinent to me. I am usually attracted to people who can teach me something, regardless of age. Unfortunately, that tends to be a quality I find in someone older or within a few years of my own age. I have been attracted to wisdom and open-mindedness my whole life. I still recall being half in love with one of my professors who was 20 years my senior. I couldn't concentrate in class because I kept watching his eyes twinkle and his crooked smile made me weak. I lived for office hours and if he had not been married, I would have come onto him. I wonder what he's doing right now...

As far as whom I attract, this is my real problem. Because I look about 15-20 years younger than I actually am, these have been almost exclusively really young guys. Very few are able to teach me much, so I might crush back a little on him but ultimately I realize I can't fall in love because he eventually says or does something immature or shows a lack of open-mindedness that I lose interest in that kind of relationship. I am open to the possibility of a younger dude but he has to be special: mature, ethical, intelligent, funny, educated, sensitive, and open-minded. I haven't met one that has all of those qualities. One came closer than the others and because of that, he ended up being a good friend. Maybe I am being too picky and should give the current young dude a chance but I fear that his heart will end up broken because I won't fall in love but he will and I will still be looking for that professor. Sigh.
 
aureliusandoinky said:
I agree with what someone said up there. ^ It's very difficult to find a partner my age that is intellectually on my level. Age doesn't matter, but at the same time, most college aged guys lack a brain (I'm not excluding girls) so I find myself being attracted to older guys that are done with all the foolishness.
Click to expand...

Key word: Most.

:p
 
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