Would you swap introversion for extroversion and vice versa?

[JamieUK92]

Does anyone ever feel like they just never make it passed the surface level with anyone though? Like I literally have one friend I consider close. The rest are just acquaintances or past friends of circumstance who never ask me to do anything with them because they have a good enough social life already.

It’s like I wish I was slightly more extroverted in a way that I could put myself out there a bit more and make friendships. I’m obviously more compatible with other introverts but due to our nature, it’s difficult to find each other via happenstance or however else people make friends these days.

I don’t want an extravagant social life but it can be very lonely sometimes and no matter how introverted you are - There comes a time when you need meaningful human interaction.

 

[Deleted member 16771]

LOL

You seem more like a well socialised introvert to me, to be honest (not that I have enough experience of you to judge), which would put you in the EN bracket.

Personally I think that neurology seems to show that there are only really INs and ESs, with an extroverted intuitive simply being someone who has learned to tolerate high levels of sensory input, and an extroverted sensor being an extrovert with social anxiety.

That's not to say that 'EN' and 'IS' aren't labels that reveal anything useful, just that in terms of the scant literature that I've read about physiological introversion and extroversion, those types are to a certain extent going 'against' the way that their brains are wired up.

 

[Deleted member 16771]

Does anyone ever feel like they just never make it passed the surface level with anyone though? Like I literally have one friend I consider close. The rest are just acquaintances or past friends of circumstance who never ask me to do anything with them because they have a good enough social life already.

Yes. I wonder if we all feel this way, because we crave a level of depth that is just not practical or attainable in the real world. Nobody will ever truly know you, not even your most intimate partner. This is life.

I don’t want an extravagant social life but it can be very lonely sometimes and no matter how introverted you are - There comes a time when you need meaningful human interaction.

I feel you. Loneliness kills and is not the same thing as solitude.

 

[Ginny]

Yes. I wonder if we all feel this way, because we crave a level of depth that is just not practical or attainable in the real world. Nobody will ever truly know you, not even your most intimate partner. This is life.

There is something that can be done, if one is inclined to do so. If you know yourself enough to do this and trust your friends/partners/etc. with it, you can show them all of yourself that you want them to see. True knowing is then only a matter of time. But it takes a lot of courage to reveal that much of yourself.

 

[JamieUK92]

There is something that can be done, if one is inclined to do so. If you know yourself enough to do this and trust your friends/partners/etc. with it, you can show them all of yourself that you want them to see. True knowing is then only a matter of time. But it takes a lot of courage to reveal that much of yourself.

I don’t even feel like I truly know myself. I mean I do know my core, intrinsic self but I find my outer layers pretty capricious.

 

[Ginny]

I don’t even feel like I truly know myself. I mean I do know my core, intrinsic self but I find my outer layers pretty capricious.

Think about it - what makes you you? your inner core that remains stable all your life, or the surrounding circumstances that you only react to?

 

[JamieUK92]

Think about it - what makes you you? your inner core that remains stable all your life, or the surrounding circumstances that you only react to?

Yeah, I guess so... life is so fucking complicated man.

 

[Ginny]

Yeah, I guess so... life is so fucking complicated man.

It's an ongoing process. If we managed to figure it out, instead of just acting on intuition, we probably wouldn't be as inquisitive as we are as a species. I've made my peace with not knowing everything but retain an incessant thirst for knowledge - just enjoying the ride

 

[JamieUK92]

It's an ongoing process. If we managed to figure it out, instead of just acting on intuition, we probably wouldn't be as inquisitive as we are as a species. I've made my peace with not knowing everything but retain an incessant thirst for knowledge - just enjoying the ride

I guess my final thought would be that introversion is a gift and a curse...

 

[Lady Jolanda]

Personally I think that neurology seems to show that there are only really INs and ESs, with an extroverted intuitive simply being someone who has learned to tolerate high levels of sensory input, and an introverted sensor being an extrovert with social anxiety.

That's fascinating. I tried Google, but didn't have much luck. Can you point me in the direction of this research?

Wonderful confirmation biased anecdotal evidence of N=1; my dad is an ISFJ and he has social anxiety.

 

[Deleted member 16771]

That's fascinating. I tried Google, but didn't have much luck. Can you point me in the direction of this research?

Wonderful confirmation biased anecdotal evidence of N=1; my dad is an ISFJ and he has social anxiety.

Yes, gimme a sec though because I got to this stuff via an answer on Quora, where the person linked a lot of neurological research and put that in context of MBTI.

If I remember correctly, it was a combination of research on neurotransmitter pathways (dopamine preferred by extroverts; acetylcholine by introverts), and some kind of membrane/coating/something (my memory is failing) around the receptors, with introverts showing less of this and therefore less resistance/more sensitivity to stimuli.

EDIT: Oh yeah, AND (the main bit), that the less of this stuff you had around your neurons meant that you could create abstract structures much more rapidly and as a preference. There was some link made between actual neuronal structures and abstract concepts.

 

[jkxx]

and some kind of membrane/coating/something (my memory is failing) around the receptors,

Would this happen to be myelin?
You have my attention now with the bit about neurotransmitters and receptors

 

[Deleted member 16771]

Yes, gimme a sec though because I got to this stuff via an answer on Quora, where the person linked a lot of neurological research and put that in context of MBTI.

If I remember correctly, it was a combination of research on neurotransmitter pathways (dopamine preferred by extroverts; acetylcholine by introverts), and some kind of membrane/coating/something (my memory is failing) around the receptors, with introverts showing less of this and therefore less resistance/more sensitivity to stimuli.

EDIT: Oh yeah, AND (the main bit), that the less of this stuff you had around your neurons meant that you could create abstract structures much more rapidly and as a preference. There was some link made between actual neuronal structures and abstract concepts.

The point she made was that N traits and I traits had the same neurological basis, just as E traits and S traits did. In other words, I and N are the same thing, just as E and S are the same thing.

It's always a bit shaky to extrapolate actual science into MBTI, but the argument she made (and the science to back it up) I found pretty compelling.

 

[Deleted member 16771]

Would this happen to be myelin?
You have my attention now with the bit about neurotransmitters and receptors

Not sure, but sounds familiar!

EDIT: Sorry, I couldn't find that exact page where the research on introversion and extroversion was put in the context of MBTI IN vs ES, but there's plenty of research out there, and I think it's interesting in any case to wonder about how MBTI correlates with reality.

 

[Sandie33]

ENTJ during the day, INFJ at night?

Perhaps dear Ren, perhaps ...

 

[Wyote]

Ni problems?

Thinking about this in relation to INFJs "Se problems" really made me laugh.

Imagine an ESTP randomly getting hit with an ah ha moment, but in a subtle way that isn't even fully understood. Like imagine you get a really good insight but your reaction to it is more like "wait, what the hell does that mean?" instead of the infjs "ah yes, it all makes sense now."

Lol. This totally sounds like an estp thing. They seem to say really smart stuff and then just question it immediately or move on to something else. Like they are tripping over Ni, same way we trip over objects.

 

[Deleted member 16771]

Thinking about this in relation to INFJs "Se problems" really made me laugh.

Imagine an ESTP randomly getting hit with an ah ha moment, but in a subtle way that isn't even fully understood. Like imagine you get a really good insight but your reaction to it is more like "wait, what the hell does that mean?" instead of the infjs "ah yes, it all makes sense now."

Lol. This totally sounds like an estp thing. They seem to say really smart stuff and then just question it immediately or move on to something else. Like they are tripping over Ni, same way we trip over objects.

'Duuuuude! All the elements of a party are connected! The beer, the music, the girls, the place... the good times emerge from these initial conditions. If I could dial in these variables, I could throw the perfect partahy!'
'Fuck that, bro, let's just take our shirts off!'

[/obvioustypism]

 

[Wyote]

[/obvioustypism]

I'm pretty sure they could throw the best party if they were determined enough to do so though lol

 

[Cookie]

When I was younger I thought it would be great to be an extrovert and I even tried to be more open and "extroverted" in my own way. It would offer backfire or be completely exhausting. Plus I found when I was my introverted self people thought I was mysterious and intimidating. And I'll trade that over being a "popular extrovert" (like my sister-in-law was in highschool she graduated a year before me and I was always alittle envious of her extroverted nature and how natural it was for her. We have since talked about these things and now know if was simply a "outsider looking in" situation and we both had similar issues with body image, eating disorders, and envy of our those opposite of our nature. It was very nice to really understand each other on a deeper level)

So long story short, no inwouin not trade being a introvert to be an extrovert. If I did I'd be a completely different person and I've already figured this one out I'm not gunna start over and have to relearn everything. Even if we are talking time machines and going back to childhood, I wouldn't pick to be an extrovert it's just not for me. I love extroverts too... Well a good amount of them at least. Lol

 

[wolly.green]

Hey,

Would be interesting to read people’s answers to this question. It’s just for a bit of fun

No offense, but I find introverts boring. You guys never talk, ever. And when I say "hey", you guys just shut off. All the introverts I know can have light conversations or small talk, but they can't have long and deep conversations. So that would be a definite NO. I like being friendly and approachable. Everyone always says I'm "bubble", and I like that.