Why doesn't age matter as much as we get older?

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Why doesn't age matter as much as we get older? just a thought.

I was noticing some people's birthdays e.g. 53, 57, 56. And it just seems that once you reach a particular age, a few years doesn't make a difference in how you may feel or how you see people. While when you're younger, a few years can seem very important or seem like a huge deal especially when choosing friends or dating someone.

Why doesn't it matter as much later on?
 
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because the vast differences disappear, I think. If you're 8 - a toddler in nappies wont be considered a friend, however, if you're 48 - someone aged 41 could well share a lot of your views. We are just in an intensive learning earlier in lives and the gaps appear wider. At least I think so... :P
 
Is it socialized into us? ie in some places maybe it isnt like that, but i dont know any examples just a thought.
 
UBERROGO said:
Is it socialized into us? ie in some places maybe it isnt like that, but i dont know any examples just a thought.
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In what way is it socialized into us? Does this mean that we don't have to see things in this way? Does this mean that age differences wouldn't matter at all even if we weren't taught that they do?
 
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I think I've repeated the same points or comments about cultural views of age already on other threads. Didn't want this to be a repeat. Sorry. :)
 
I think it is because when we are kids we are all constantly developing both mentally and physically at different speeds, which is why a difference between a 14 year old and 16 year old person is much bigger than a difference between a 40 year old and 45 year old person. Also age does matter when we get older. An adult person would not really hang out with some teenagers :D.
 
Our personalities are formed pretty early in life. Probably by the time you reach your early 20's you're set. Oh - you may tweak it and change a few things along the way - but pretty much you don't change. Only your outward appearances change as you age.

30 years ago my mother told me she woke up one day - looked in the mirror - and said I don't feel any older - but my body sure does. Hahahahahahaha.....

I have learned many lessons while being here on this forum but I can tell you one thing that really surprised me is the NON age differences between myself and the majority here.

We ALL want to be loved, safe and secure, and to be able to create according to our natural proclivities.
We all were born in Fear.
We all go through loss and heartache and anger.

This is what it is to be human.

All the rest is cultural conditioning....Once you weed through that - you can get to the heart of the matter for almost anyone - and you realize we all are one and the same.
 
I think it is in part socialized, like uberrogo suggested, in that our society does not frown upon or question friendships between say a 40 year old and a 48 year old. The larger the age gap, the more it does so, especially romantic relationships. But we also define childhood in particular ways that establishes a divide between children and adults, and therefore seens the relationship as one of unequals. The idea of an adult leaning on a child seems exploitative or unfair. However, there are also of course real differences in maturity levels and needs between the two, as well as life interests, responsibilities, and perspectives that factor in. Children and adults have different purposes in life until children reach the so-called age of maturity and their life purposes or perspectives begin to resemble each other a little more.
 
I agree with everyone. I noticed somewhere around my mid 20's that I had a lot of friend that were in their 40's and 50's and started dating men in their early 40's etc.

While I don't really have much in common with anyone in their early 20's I do have one really good friend that is 24. I think sometime (I don't really know when) you start noticing that physical age doesn't measure someone's maturity as well as it did when we were younger, so physical age becomes a bit meaningless.
 
CindyLou said:
I think sometime (I don't really know when) you start noticing that physical age doesn't measure someone's maturity as well as it did when we were younger, so physical age becomes a bit meaningless.
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This.

Most of my friends tend to be older than I am, that's the way it always was. There is only one who's almost the same age I am because mostly I just can't relate to people my age group, to be honest... Sometimes I feel that they are now where I've been many years ago. I don't mean it as a bad thing at all. I just think that circumstances and life situations can carve people. Our interests are worlds apart as well! I feel like a grandma for being so reserved and staying away from booze and parties. Doesn't interest me at all, I've measured my booze limits years ago and lost interest. We aren't fun for each other, that's all.
When I was 15 two years seemed like a huge difference where now 20 seem like nothing. You know, there are immature individuals of any age group. It really doesn't matter for me if someone is 18 or 70 years old if they're interesting personas.
 
Cedar said:
Why doesn't it matter as much later on?
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Because like everything else, we tend to forget. Or we would like to forget we are aging, I might correct.

Older adults don't mix with teenagers because the teenagers don't want to hang out with them, not the other way around.

When we're wise and mature enough, maybe we like to hang out with people of all ages because the older people can still teach us something and the young can give us something to remember.
 
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I would never hang out with a teen. Lol. I have to like, remind myself they are still people.
 
Interesting points so far but I didn't mean that people who are teens should socialize with someone in their 40s and pretend there aren't differences. Not what I was thinking. I was thinking more about why 3 or 4 years differences matters little when someone is older but can matter so much when you're younger. In other words, at some three years younger or older is still considered in the same age group. I think someone already answered this by pointing out that when we're younger, we go through significant and intense growth and changes in shorter period of time. So, of course 9 is different from 13 and 15 is still not legally the same as 18. But once you reach 35+, for example, 5 years difference may not matter as much. You're listed in the age group with someone is nearing 40 or early 40s.
 
I was suffering so much back at school because my first love was 17 and I was 13. It seemed like such a gap back then :redface: feels ridiculous right now...
 
pipsqueaka said:
Older adults don't mix with teenagers because the teenagers don't want to hang out with them, not the other way around.
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What makes you say this?

I would never hang out with a teenager, and not just because of other people… it would be weird and uncomfortable for so many other reasons, and I quickly lose patience with people who are just discovering things that I've left behind.
 
Apone said:
What makes you say this?

I would never hang out with a teenager, and not just because of other people… it would be weird and uncomfortable for so many other reasons, and I quickly lose patience with people who are just discovering things that I've left behind.
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Stu has said "teenagers lack the self esteem needed to hang with the over thirty set".

Are you just a few years past teenagerhood? In my experience, I was meaning a lot older.
 
pipsqueaka said:
Stu has said "teenagers lack the self esteem needed to hang with the over thirty set".

Are you just a few years past teenagerhood? In my experience, I was meaning a lot older.
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I'm in my early thirties.

I do get the urge to do something teenagery every now and then, but it's kind of unbelievable that someone my age would feel the urge to socialize with someone who still lives with their parents. I think it's because once you've been on your own for 10 years or so, you really don't have any urge to start sneaking around because you don't want someone to know you're having sex or smoking cigarettes... or ask your parents if you can borrow the car, or use the word 'cool' to describe almost everything, etc. If my parents tried to control my behavior while I was visiting them or out in public, I would be absolutely mortified. I don't even know if most teenagers are aware of how much older people do not want to deal with these kinds of things.

Stu knows what he's talking about.
 
Blackmountainside said:
do believe my passive approach fuels this impression in others. but for some reason, i have little desire to tell and show people any different.
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I experience the same. Appearing passive or not as outwardly expressive often makes people assume young, inexperienced, uncertain, unaware, or innocent. As I get older, I realize I don't have to care so much about it anymore. It is what it is.
 
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After a certain threshold, time seems to move so fast, that the increase in the number of our age becomes less and less valuable to keep track of. You are still delighted to have your 4th piece of lemon pie, but once you reach your 20th piece of lemon pie, it may as well be your 50th piece. You lose count, because you're tired of counting and noticing the number -- you are ready to appreciate quality and not quantity.
 
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