Things you most like and dislike about (being an) INFJ(s) | Page 2 | INFJ Forum

Things you most like and dislike about (being an) INFJ(s)

This sounds so weird to me. It almost sounds like searching for a perfect person/acquaintance/friend/partner. I might be misreading that.

It's weird to me, because it's almost the opposite to how I feel: I'm often frustrated with myself that I'm either not more diligent or extroverted enough to get to know the people I know better (like there's not enough of myself to keep up with the people I encounter). Also I start disappointed, but get more interested in people as I get to know their quirks and shortcomings. I have a very soft spot for flawed difficult people.
In a aspect the search for a perfect person- although nobody's perfect, we will say favorable...is something I do ..But more so in a life partner. Seems like I always put in so much into relationship and got little in return became a choir instead of something I enjoyed to offer.. people in general I have walked away from everyone I ever known so I can agree with Wyote. Don't know really why we or I do it just something like if your not satisfied with it then you won't tolerate it but I took a more extreme path by door slamming everyone I ever knew but I was in the need to start over my life and try to create one I can live in without wanting to exit out.. I useully give everyone that I see worthy trust up front and let them chip away at it.
I guess if I could say what I like about INFJ is we care alot to help others and atleast for me are quite selfless in character.
Dislike that I can't seem to find satisfaction in things even if I reach my goal I then raise it higher ..I'm getting better with it but I still expect to much from myself and others on things..
 
I'll add one more to the list is mainly wanting for there to be more variety only to keep running into the more or less the same personality in like 70% of the population. It does amaze me in all the wrong way how repetitive it can be when dealing with others of my own gender regardless of demographics like age ect.
 
Like: Human behavior is transparent to us. We really do "see it coming."
Dislike: Not wanting to take a firm stand because we see all the areas between yes and no.
yes I and I'm sure most INFJ beings very cognizant about human behavior. For myself it is probably one of my greatest interest I don't know why but understanding people is fulfilling to my mind. Or maybe it helps me understand myself ? Because I often feel so dissimiliar to the collective. Either way I observe and can determine people well.
I like how you worded" see all the areas between yes and no ." Being able to see all directions is digressive for what you described.I have alot of trouble taking a stand to and know what you mean. But seeing between the lines does promote humility and creates multifarious reasoning/understanding which is progressive.. so it's a good trade. I rather understand both sides than push factual opinions..Have a good day..
 
I like how easy and satisfying it is to be alone, how connected it feels to have instances of aha moments here and there
I dislike the effort it takes to drive, how hard it is to untangle a gardening hose, follow detailed instructions of any kind, do precise data entry, and some weird overwhelming sense of ennui and being drained when trying to normal for too long, feeling like I'm bad at 'life'
 
I dislike when I have to "defend my reasons" to Te/Fi types. They demand to reach a consensus about "the facts." They think they're objective. If you argue with them long enough, you eventually dig up their real reason -- and it often boils down to their personal preference.

I like that Ti/Fe admits to personal bias from the start. Anymore, I give Te's my value-based reason first -- because they cannot argue with how I feel. (Fi honors individual feelings.) Then the burden is on to them to give me all their reasons, which I can analyze, accept or reject.

Te/Fi selectively uses facts to defend individual values. It's rigid and creates conflict. At least Ti/Fe compiles its truth and acknowledges the values of others. It's flexible and can create unity.
 
I'm not sure I'm in a healthy headspace right now. That being said...F it.

I can forecast intent and behavior to see people as they exist. Warts and all. I see my warts too. I want to help fix people, but as I've matured I'm not sure people are broken or need fixing. They're usually midway thru learning lessons or purposely avoiding what I perceive as a problem. I need to let people be. Give them objective feedback if and only if they want it. Let them sort it out. I'm dented and cracked and mundane as the next unicorn. Last thing I need to do it start poking around creating more problems.
 
I like to recognize things in advance, to understand connections more deeply.

I don't like to guess years in advance how bad things will go on with certain people.

I often ask myself, should I warn them, or will the bad come out even faster? Should I interfere in their lives? Should I be the one who predicts negative things for them?

I don't like that it makes me sad to have had "friends" who have moved and therefore have no more contact with me, although they could call. And then I ask myself, should I always run after the "friends"? Were they real friends?
 
Send them a random message that something you tripped over in life made you remember them. Don't ask them how they are. Don't expect or want a response. Wish them well and move on. If they care they'll write back. If not, then you have your answer. Give freely.

...there I go again. Meddling.
 
I like understanding people on a much deeper level than many others.

I like being introverted.

I love/dislike (hate is too strong a word) my level of empathy, it's too deep and I wish I had the strength to just switch off at times but it never works, I care too deeply and I need to stop doing that with everyone and let people be. I only do this with people I've not developed any kind of emotional connection with but even then the caring comes out.

I dislike over thinking and how I miss very detailed things because I'm over thinking everything under the sun and then my brains about to explode.
 
Thanks for understanding my post. Both Te/Fi and Fe/Ti can reach faulty conclusions and justify them as moral or good. I don't want to belittle Te/Fi users, but they need to recognize their weaknesses. A fact is not necessarily true because the group believes it. This is causing some conspiracy theories that are dividing the USA today. Added to that, a strong sense of indignation from Fi equals a lack of compassion for other viewpoints. This is a dangerous combination.

In comparison, Ti says, "I have rationalized this fact," which is how science actually proves things to be true -- through conclusions drawn from longterm, repetitive testing and peer-review. In its search for truth, the scientific community regularly debunks previous studies. There's no shame involved. Newer studies use better instruments and methodology. Fe checks its defensiveness and accepts the new data.
 
...I want to help fix people, but as I've matured I'm not sure people are broken or need fixing. They're usually midway thru learning lessons or purposely avoiding what I perceive as a problem. I need to let people be. Give them objective feedback if and only if they want it. Let them sort it out.

I often ask myself, should I warn them, or will the bad come out even faster? Should I interfere in their lives? Should I be the one who predicts negative things for them?

Oh, yes, I have been bitten badly by warning people -- even though I turned out to be right. They don't want to see it ahead of time and -- even more surprisingly -- they refuse to see it after it happens. They make excuses and blame it on external causes instead of their own choices. This is how people want to be.

All you can do is say, once, quietly and firmly, what you believe to be true. Saying too much, too often makes people ignore or forget your words. I do, however, think you have a moral obligation to speak your truth. Be brave, but not forceful. With any fairness, people will come to associate your words with wisdom.
 
I like that I have an active mind which takes me to places and gives me interesting insights into the nature of the world.

I dislike that it is hard for me to be myself around people. I always end up sacrificing a part of me to fit into a group dynamic. It's great some times, makes me affable. Other times it negatively impacts my decision making and I end up making regrettable choices.
 
All you can do is say, once, quietly and firmly, what you believe to be true. Saying too much, too often makes people ignore or forget your words. I do, however, think you have a moral obligation to speak your truth. Be brave, but not forceful. With any fairness, people will come to associate your words with wisdom.

Most of the time I pack my hunches into questions.
I do not say: This is how it will happen if you continue as before. But rather like this:
What do you think happens when someone makes these and these decisions in his life?
 
I dislike when I have to "defend my reasons" to Te/Fi types. They demand to reach a consensus about "the facts." They think they're objective. If you argue with them long enough, you eventually dig up their real reason -- and it often boils down to their personal preference.

I like that Ti/Fe admits to personal bias from the start. Anymore, I give Te's my value-based reason first -- because they cannot argue with how I feel. (Fi honors individual feelings.) Then the burden is on to them to give me all their reasons, which I can analyze, accept or reject.

Te/Fi selectively uses facts to defend individual values. It's rigid and creates conflict. At least Ti/Fe compiles its truth and acknowledges the values of others. It's flexible and can create unity.

The whole lets all hate on Fi like it is the bogyman of the era gets pretty old especially when it circle jerks like it is reddit or 4chan ect. There are deep flaws with all the functions one way or another that do make for some horrendous real life experiences.
 
I dislike that INFJ is a rare type for a few reasons.

– It sucks that everyone who has ever felt different, or wants to be unique and makes an effort to be unique, thinks they are an INFJ. We're likely the most mistyped of the 16 types.
– Because INFJ is the most common type on the Internet, and simultaneously labeled "the rarest type", there is an elitist, "You're a poser," attitude about the type.
– Female INTJs are the rarest type, but get no credit for it. Male INFJs are the next rarest.
– It sucks to be a less common type (note: I didn't say "rarest") because people misunderstand who we are and what we say and do. This is more trouble than it is worth. Not fun. I vote two out of ten stars.

Other aspects I dislike:

– The outstanding characteristic of the INFJ is that we are a little like so many other types, but not enough like any of them, except INTJ. We're the platypus of the MBTI, not the unicorn. At least INTJ is either a beaver or a duck. I forget, but one of them.
– Hitler. Both that he was an INFJ and that INFJs argue that he wasn't, because they don't want to be associated with a monster.
– People think we are fake. We're overly complicated beings. If ENFPs or ESFPs were as multilayered the world would explode.
– People have a misconception that we are sweet, fluffy, pure marshmallows. They are very angry or hurt when the burnt side of the marshmallow shows.
– We can be pains in the ass, especially when we are convinced of something. (Hitler, Gandhi, MLK, Mandela, all pains in the ass.)
– Ni dominance makes us weird. Secondary Fe makes us want to fit in. There is no peace in this.

– We are terrible listeners. This is the INFJ brain while someone else is talking:


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