SilverWolf
Newbie
- MBTI
- INFJ
- Enneagram
- 5
First off, English is my second language. Apologies for any mistakes.
FYI: I'm almost 19 and male - though I suspect that is visible on my profile.
I've felt like I'm different from others my whole life. Not just that I have a different background and upbringing than most others or that I have on paper that I apparently have a high IQ (a term very few people have even heard here in northern Europe), but that there has rarely been any other person alive who has completely understood me.
The ironic thing is, at times, I even have trouble understanding myself - because I have never been able to define my personality. I recently discovered the Myers-Briggs personality system and got INFJ. Afterwards, I remembered a similar test we did in high school a few years back, where I know I scored that combination of letters as well, but at that time I never realised what it meant.
I am an introvert, I can't deny it. The thing that bugs me is how my personality is capable of containing pretty much any conceivable, in lack of a better word, opposites.
While I am definitely an introvert and much prefer staying home and watching a movie to going out and party with my friends, I definitely enjoy the company of other people and I grow restless without social contact. I enjoy the odd phone call or going to see a movie or grab a pizza with old friends, but I loathe the expectations that come with what one usually calls "friendship". Whenever someone suggests a social activity, my first reaction is "how do I get out of this?" whether I suspect it's actually going to be fun or not. For some reason, I prefer staying at home even though it's boring most of the time. I have no problem with not talking to an individual for years, but then meet and pick up right where we left off. I am very careful with the word "friendship". I rarely use it in any context involving myself, because I don't want to force myself on people or compel them to live up to expectations that I wouldn't want on myself.
People tell me I have a warm heart, and it's true, I really care about my family and friends. I even have trouble watching sad movies etc. I abhor horror movies, and feel physically sick and have to leave the room whenever friends watch flicks like "Saw" or other gory stuff. By default, I am very sensitive. However, when I'm angry, upset or just displeased with mankind or one person in particular, I know I can be very cold, objective, threatening and uncanny. I can look right into people and read how they are feeling, while others keep blabbing about, seemingly oblivious to the moods of others.
I am objective and analytical and I want things to be logical, but at the same time, my vivid imagination and ability of abstract reasoning are two of my strongest traits. I don't believe everything can be explained by science, and I dislike people who stubbornly rule out the possibility of a higher power, just as much as I dislike those who rub the Bible or Quran in your face and tell you there is no other way but the way of their god. I am raised a Christian, but I want to keep my mind open for possibilities and ideas. I love philosophy and existential matters.
And as much as I love philosophy, as it gives me a chance to let out some of my inherent depth, I hate shallow people. And there are a lot of them. Please let me rephrase what I said at the beginning of this post: I believe I have never met anyone with the same emotional and intellectual depth, and those few who even come close are close blood relations. I don't want to come across as a showoff, please don't dismiss me as arrogant. I have very nice friends with a number of gifts, but conversing with them always feels relatively shallow. (Not to mention when they talk to each other.) And whenever they think they say something deep, in my eyes, they are hardly scratching the surface.
The opposites go on. I have a very good memory, with music, names and sounds, as well as photographic. When I want to, I can be very observant and remember details about my surrounding such as car plates and 15-20+ digit combinations. However, I can also be totally shut off from the physical realm and lost within my own mind - simply because my mind is often more interesting than the outside world. This caused quite a few problems in primary school Physical Education - I was standing around, thinking about the purpose of the existence of mankind, while my teammates screamed at me for missing the ball. That was the problem - the ball wasn't very interesting.
All in all, I never liked school much for what it was - I was more comfortable in the company of teachers than fellow classmates. Some of the teachers possessed a kind of dry, academic humour and irony which I loved but my classmates never understood. I have always preferred the company of elders over that of people my own age - simply because they're often more mature and share some of my interests.
I have never known for sure what I want to work with (definitely not sports, heh). I am interested and gifted in a number of things from language to science. I have gone through pretty much every job on the list, from business attourney to army officer. No existing profession really speaks to me, though I have a passion for the English language. Going to university in the spring and will try to sort my life out, I guess. I tried Law, as I have a profound and instinctive sense of what's right and wrong and I believe it's important that justice is done, but it was too dull and meager for me. It felt like I might as well have been a textbook. It's very important to me to know that I'm making a difference - and I want to be appreciated for what I know. I hate working in groups ever since school, because others have always relied on my intellect and perseverence to see us through and get a good grade. Neither am I attracted by a leadership position. I am more of an individualist, constantly questioning the systems and rules we have set for ourselves.
I have a wonderful INFJ girlfriend, and she's the one most similar to myself I have ever met. We never fight, and we have similar natures. I read on several sites that people believe an INFJ/INFJ relationship is dull, but she's one of the few I can actually relate to - though personality-wise vastly different from me in multiple aspects.
I'm sorry, this turned out to be quite a long post. Kudos if you read this far. I'm wondering if any other INFJs (or any other MBTI types out there) feel or have ever felt the same way, and I'd love to hear some of your experiences.
Cheers.
FYI: I'm almost 19 and male - though I suspect that is visible on my profile.
I've felt like I'm different from others my whole life. Not just that I have a different background and upbringing than most others or that I have on paper that I apparently have a high IQ (a term very few people have even heard here in northern Europe), but that there has rarely been any other person alive who has completely understood me.
The ironic thing is, at times, I even have trouble understanding myself - because I have never been able to define my personality. I recently discovered the Myers-Briggs personality system and got INFJ. Afterwards, I remembered a similar test we did in high school a few years back, where I know I scored that combination of letters as well, but at that time I never realised what it meant.
I am an introvert, I can't deny it. The thing that bugs me is how my personality is capable of containing pretty much any conceivable, in lack of a better word, opposites.
While I am definitely an introvert and much prefer staying home and watching a movie to going out and party with my friends, I definitely enjoy the company of other people and I grow restless without social contact. I enjoy the odd phone call or going to see a movie or grab a pizza with old friends, but I loathe the expectations that come with what one usually calls "friendship". Whenever someone suggests a social activity, my first reaction is "how do I get out of this?" whether I suspect it's actually going to be fun or not. For some reason, I prefer staying at home even though it's boring most of the time. I have no problem with not talking to an individual for years, but then meet and pick up right where we left off. I am very careful with the word "friendship". I rarely use it in any context involving myself, because I don't want to force myself on people or compel them to live up to expectations that I wouldn't want on myself.
People tell me I have a warm heart, and it's true, I really care about my family and friends. I even have trouble watching sad movies etc. I abhor horror movies, and feel physically sick and have to leave the room whenever friends watch flicks like "Saw" or other gory stuff. By default, I am very sensitive. However, when I'm angry, upset or just displeased with mankind or one person in particular, I know I can be very cold, objective, threatening and uncanny. I can look right into people and read how they are feeling, while others keep blabbing about, seemingly oblivious to the moods of others.
I am objective and analytical and I want things to be logical, but at the same time, my vivid imagination and ability of abstract reasoning are two of my strongest traits. I don't believe everything can be explained by science, and I dislike people who stubbornly rule out the possibility of a higher power, just as much as I dislike those who rub the Bible or Quran in your face and tell you there is no other way but the way of their god. I am raised a Christian, but I want to keep my mind open for possibilities and ideas. I love philosophy and existential matters.
And as much as I love philosophy, as it gives me a chance to let out some of my inherent depth, I hate shallow people. And there are a lot of them. Please let me rephrase what I said at the beginning of this post: I believe I have never met anyone with the same emotional and intellectual depth, and those few who even come close are close blood relations. I don't want to come across as a showoff, please don't dismiss me as arrogant. I have very nice friends with a number of gifts, but conversing with them always feels relatively shallow. (Not to mention when they talk to each other.) And whenever they think they say something deep, in my eyes, they are hardly scratching the surface.
The opposites go on. I have a very good memory, with music, names and sounds, as well as photographic. When I want to, I can be very observant and remember details about my surrounding such as car plates and 15-20+ digit combinations. However, I can also be totally shut off from the physical realm and lost within my own mind - simply because my mind is often more interesting than the outside world. This caused quite a few problems in primary school Physical Education - I was standing around, thinking about the purpose of the existence of mankind, while my teammates screamed at me for missing the ball. That was the problem - the ball wasn't very interesting.
All in all, I never liked school much for what it was - I was more comfortable in the company of teachers than fellow classmates. Some of the teachers possessed a kind of dry, academic humour and irony which I loved but my classmates never understood. I have always preferred the company of elders over that of people my own age - simply because they're often more mature and share some of my interests.
I have never known for sure what I want to work with (definitely not sports, heh). I am interested and gifted in a number of things from language to science. I have gone through pretty much every job on the list, from business attourney to army officer. No existing profession really speaks to me, though I have a passion for the English language. Going to university in the spring and will try to sort my life out, I guess. I tried Law, as I have a profound and instinctive sense of what's right and wrong and I believe it's important that justice is done, but it was too dull and meager for me. It felt like I might as well have been a textbook. It's very important to me to know that I'm making a difference - and I want to be appreciated for what I know. I hate working in groups ever since school, because others have always relied on my intellect and perseverence to see us through and get a good grade. Neither am I attracted by a leadership position. I am more of an individualist, constantly questioning the systems and rules we have set for ourselves.
I have a wonderful INFJ girlfriend, and she's the one most similar to myself I have ever met. We never fight, and we have similar natures. I read on several sites that people believe an INFJ/INFJ relationship is dull, but she's one of the few I can actually relate to - though personality-wise vastly different from me in multiple aspects.
I'm sorry, this turned out to be quite a long post. Kudos if you read this far. I'm wondering if any other INFJs (or any other MBTI types out there) feel or have ever felt the same way, and I'd love to hear some of your experiences.
Cheers.
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). I had the luck of meeting few people who can comprehend things on a similar emotional and intellectual level as I can, which is very important to me. It's only a handful of people but it's enough for me. Not surprisingly I hate shallow people too 
. I find myself almost hating some people I have to deal with everyday, which sometimes scares me and I try to be more positive about them.
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