[NSFW] STOP STARING.

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hi. my name is sam. i have been in the program for 19 years, and i am on step 8 out of 12. My problem is...


oh.


sorry wrong forum...


Well anyways, so like... I'm at work. And my problem is that everyone just stares at me. EVERYONE. Like all these girls be catching glances at me. And it freaks me out ! As well as these two dudes they just stare at me. And I can't freaking figure it out.

Yea, that's literally like my entire post. Not that in depth, but I'm really trying to figure out why they do that. I know like 6 girls are attracted to me, but even the "sexy" girls (by hetero standards) stare at me. I don't have spinach in my teeth, and I'm well liked, so I know it's not like "hey look at SAM!" But still... The fact that I don't know why they do it, really bugs me. I think the main reason I want to know why is there is this dude who I'm guessing is gay, who stares at me with that glisten in his eyes. And I'm trying to decipher what that means!


:m107:

Anyone have any similar experiences who came to figure out what the staring meant
 
I see people looking at me once in a while, but not for the reasons you describe :D

Sounds like you're a pretty attractive guy, so why not enjoy the attention?
 
being fat does not mean you are unattractive...then again I AM biased lol. XD


I'm with Anita, enjoy the attention
 
I don't like attention if I don't know why I am receiving it.:m100:
 
Use your Ni to figure it out
 
Have you ever thought of asking or would that feel weird?
 
Urtehnoes said:
hi. my name is sam. i have been in the program for 19 years, and i am on step 8 out of 12. My problem is...


oh.


sorry wrong forum...
Click to expand...

it's okay. we already know about that problem.


Well anyways, so like... I'm at work. And my problem is that everyone just stares at me. EVERYONE. Like all these girls be catching glances at me. And it freaks me out ! As well as these two dudes they just stare at me. And I can't freaking figure it out.

Yea, that's literally like my entire post. Not that in depth, but I'm really trying to figure out why they do that. I know like 6 girls are attracted to me, but even the "sexy" girls (by hetero standards) stare at me. I don't have spinach in my teeth, and I'm well liked, so I know it's not like "hey look at SAM!" But still... The fact that I don't know why they do it, really bugs me. I think the main reason I want to know why is there is this dude who I'm guessing is gay, who stares at me with that glisten in his eyes. And I'm trying to decipher what that means!
Click to expand...

just ask them to stop. could be they don't realize they're doing it, or that it's freaking you out.
 
NI! Get it. Like I said no. But instead I said Ni.

Problem is, when it comes to situations like this, I don't trust my ni. My Se takes over in times like this, and SE is no good to me. And that's why i'm crap. I never trust my ni, though my ni is always right. And the thing is, my ni is teling me it's because I'm good looking, but then my se says "THATS WISHFUL THINKING! WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME EVERYONE WAS STARING"

and so the battle wages on.
 
Revenwyn said:
Unless you're a girl, then it does, apparently.
Click to expand...


I don't find fat girls or fat boys unnattractive. I mean when I say fat girls its non sexually, but with boys it is.


I just can't fathom anyone finding me attractive, especially someone that I do.
 
Haha! No matter how confident I get, I am never comfortable with people staring. And I have one particular coworker who stares a little too much. It just so happens she's female. It makes me uncomfortable then I think, damn, she wishes she was 20 years younger and hot like this, lol. So take it as a compliment, and stare back sometime if you want to scare them off, or get laid!
 
So, why would it bother you if they were staring because you were good looking?
 
Anita said:
So, why would it bother you if they were staring because you were good looking?
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Because I can't know for sure if that's why they are staring. IF THAT IS WHY, then hah, keep on staring. But I don't know, and it'd be really awkward, because what if they weren't actually staring? What if it is just my perception of them staring? I mean if I went up to the dude and say "y stare ?" and he goes (in his sexy voice) "What? I was reading the poster above your head" (assuming he is not bs'ing) (We have posters hanging from the ceiling like all over the place) then I'd be like "o..." Which isn't good.
 
Urtehnoes said:
Because I can't know for sure if that's why they are staring. IF THAT IS WHY, then hah, keep on staring. But I don't know, and it'd be really awkward, because what if they weren't actually staring? What if it is just my perception of them staring? I mean if I went up to the dude and say "y stare ?" and he goes (in his sexy voice) "What? I was reading the poster above your head" (assuming he is not bs'ing) (We have posters hanging from the ceiling like all over the place) then I'd be like "o..." Which isn't good.
Click to expand...

Maybe choose a select few who you know and trust and check your perceptions with them.

btw, you've now made me really curious about your pic.
 
Do you pick or scratch or fidget at all? Or perhaps mutter to yourself a little? If you don't its a fair guess that you are a topic of interest at your work for a little more than general attractiveness. Next question: is your sexuality known to your workplace? The reason everyone might be staring is because it came up in general gossip what you are/are not and now everyone is trying to "feel you out" to figure out if you are or not. Being pretty makes it even worse.
Also, being started at a little will make you paranoid enough to think everyone is. Then when you start looking uncomfortable people look at you more because they think you're up to something. Or your mind is just getting out of hand with paranoia and thus inflating whatever you are worrying about :P.

Let it gooooooo...
//stoner zen
 
Anita said:
Maybe choose a select few who you know and trust and check your perceptions with them.

btw, you've now made me really curious about your pic.
Click to expand...

Lol I have pics posted :p

DoveAlexa said:
Do you pick or scratch or fidget at all? Or perhaps mutter to yourself a little? If you don't its a fair guess that you are a topic of interest at your work for a little more than general attractiveness. Next question: is your sexuality known to your workplace? The reason everyone might be staring is because it came up in general gossip what you are/are not and now everyone is trying to "feel you out" to figure out if you are or not. Being pretty makes it even worse.
Also, being started at a little will make you paranoid enough to think everyone is. Then when you start looking uncomfortable people look at you more because they think you're up to something. Or your mind is just getting out of hand with paranoia and thus inflating whatever you are worrying about :P.

Let it gooooooo...
//stoner zen
Click to expand...


Haha, no. I mean not to be arrogant but I'm quite the jokester and I make almost every single person in the bldg crack up...

And I work at an answering service, like 99% of the dudes here are gay.
 
Urtehnoes said:
Lol I have pics posted :p




Haha, no. I mean not to be arrogant but I'm quite the jokester and I make almost every single person in the bldg crack up...

And I work at an answering service, like 99% of the dudes here are gay.
Click to expand...

let's see here,

-you work at a place where most dudes are gay
-you're gay
-you're certain you're entertaining and well liked
-your Ni is telling you they're staring at you because they find you attractive, but you don't trust it
-you're adverse to telling them outright to stop, because, as mentioned before, you're uncertain if it's all in your head

could certainly be you're projecting your unconscious desires onto your coworkers, and seeing what you wanna see~
why not test it? come up with a way to test if they're really staring at you, by dressing really oddly and seeing how they react. or something xD
 
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