- MBTI
- ENFP
- Enneagram
- 947 sx/sp
Loneliness is an experience in which one perceives a relationship deficit—the sense that the quality or the number of one’s relationships are unsatisfactory.
People who experience social loneliness feel like they are not part of a group that shares their interests, that they do not belong, that they lack some measure of social integration, or experience their social network as deficient. Those more likely to experience social loneliness include people who have moved to a new school or job or migrated to a new country.
Those who experience emotional loneliness feel they lack intimacy, and have the perception they are missing an “intimate attachment relationship” or that their existing relationship is inadequate. Emotional loneliness is a very common experience in people who have recently divorced or become widowed.
Yay! Two ways to be unhappy!
j/k ...I wonder if Enneagram sx subtypes are more prone to the latter, and Enneagram so subtypes the former.
Social and emotional loneliness in a large sample of Dutch adults aged 19-65: Associations with risk factors
From the abstract:
Risk factors associated with both types of loneliness (equal effect sizes) included being an immigrant and having a low income. Drinking and being physically active, in contrast, were linked with lower loneliness.
In some cases, effect sizes were not similar. For instance, living alone, being unmarried, psychological distress (e.g., anxiety, depression), joblessness, having a high body mass index, and suicidal thoughts were more strongly correlated with emotional loneliness, whereas poor health, having multiple chronic diseases, being an older man, and having a lower level of education were more strongly correlated with social loneliness.
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I suppose I have experienced social loneliness all my life, for a number of reasons, and given my sex, age, and health, it’s downhill from here.
That said, this has never been a great bother either, because I have the desire to belong combined with the desire to avoid belonging to groups.
But emotional loneliness? It’s Hell on Earth for me. Is that because I am primary Enneagram sx subtype? I think so. Thankfully, I do not currently experience this. Not surprisingly, intimacy is my highest ideal, to know and be known, and abandonment is my greatest fear.
Are you lonely? If you dare to share, which kind?
Cheers,
Ian
People who experience social loneliness feel like they are not part of a group that shares their interests, that they do not belong, that they lack some measure of social integration, or experience their social network as deficient. Those more likely to experience social loneliness include people who have moved to a new school or job or migrated to a new country.
Those who experience emotional loneliness feel they lack intimacy, and have the perception they are missing an “intimate attachment relationship” or that their existing relationship is inadequate. Emotional loneliness is a very common experience in people who have recently divorced or become widowed.
Yay! Two ways to be unhappy!

Social and emotional loneliness in a large sample of Dutch adults aged 19-65: Associations with risk factors
From the abstract:
Multiple socio-demographic, health indicators and health behaviours were associated with higher scores on both types of loneliness, although the predictive power of multiple risk factors differed by type. Additionally, female gender, younger age, medium or high educational level and smoking were associated with lower social loneliness scores specifically, while having a paid job and lower body mass index were associated with lower emotional loneliness scores.
Risk factors associated with both types of loneliness (equal effect sizes) included being an immigrant and having a low income. Drinking and being physically active, in contrast, were linked with lower loneliness.
In some cases, effect sizes were not similar. For instance, living alone, being unmarried, psychological distress (e.g., anxiety, depression), joblessness, having a high body mass index, and suicidal thoughts were more strongly correlated with emotional loneliness, whereas poor health, having multiple chronic diseases, being an older man, and having a lower level of education were more strongly correlated with social loneliness.
-------
I suppose I have experienced social loneliness all my life, for a number of reasons, and given my sex, age, and health, it’s downhill from here.

But emotional loneliness? It’s Hell on Earth for me. Is that because I am primary Enneagram sx subtype? I think so. Thankfully, I do not currently experience this. Not surprisingly, intimacy is my highest ideal, to know and be known, and abandonment is my greatest fear.
Are you lonely? If you dare to share, which kind?
Cheers,
Ian