It's gonna be alright.

[Barnabas]

"It's gonna be alright", "we'll be ok", "don't woory about it", "trust me."

Every time I've uddered these words I have been right, literally 100%.

My question is why is it that I constantly having to reassure other and even then they don't believe me until the ordeal is over. Why can't people just trust me, even when I've been right in the past.

Also For the life of me, in my short life these words have never been spoken to me. At least not that I can remember. It's draining having to be the emotional support and yet never recieving any.

 

[Raccoon Love]

Well perhaps its because when one is emotionally unstable or depressed one starts to loose all hope, they black out and not really analyze things logically, their emotions take over them on a uncontrollable state. The person who feels this way might not just believe anymore and those phrases such as ''it's going to be ok'' or ''it's going to be alright'' might sound to cliche for them, resulting in them just ignoring you. I think the fact that it is a characteristic of an INFJ to take care of others, we are empaths after all, other types however might not have such ability and not return any sort of emotional advice, the INFJ is rather hard to understand and many people might not know how to support us aside from maybe other INFJ's..anyways just answering to the best of my ability..*hugs*

 

[The Jester]

Because words can be meaningless.
People just say them to create a better social atmosphere.

'Hey, do you think I'm fat?'
'Of course I don't honey!'

People lie, and it's probably for the best.

 

[Celsius100]

"It's gonna be alright", "we'll be ok", "don't woory about it", "trust me."

Every time I've uddered these words I have been right, literally 100%.

My question is why is it that I constantly having to reassure other and even then they don't believe me until the ordeal is over. Why can't people just trust me, even when I've been right in the past.

Very much the same here. Though on occasion it's a bit founded that the other party has doubts, like when it's to the point of finding a lost wallet in downtown Chicago during rush hour. But if I say things are going to be alright, it almost feels like all odds against it just vanish, and it turns out fine.

Likewise, if I say it's going to rain, it will, and my friends will undoubtedly brush me aside and set up a trip to the beach/amusement park. It'd be nice if people would listen here or there, eh?

Also, in terms of emotional issues, I believe Raccoon nailed it. Self-located stress creates a blanket that blocks off the ability to see the grand scheme of things, methinks. I'm great with helping others with this when they're stressed, but the moment I hit a certain point myself, it's like my common sense gets surgically removed. Pressure does crazy stuff.

 

[Barnabas]

Because words can be meaningless.
People just say them to create a better social atmosphere.

'Hey, do you think I'm fat?'
'Of course I don't honey!'

People lie, and it's probably for the best.

but I'm not lying or trying to improve the atmosphere. I had similar experiences in pleasant situations that went south. Or even in non-serious matters this trend occurs

 

[Gaze]

One thing that you'll have to keep in mind, is their uncertainty is less about you than how they feel about themselves and their ability to get through a situation. People have to come terms with things on their own, not because others want them to. So, it's not about whether you're right. They need to know for themselves and believe they can get through it and survive a situation, outside of what others feel. And for many, when someone says "it's alright," or 'it's going to be ok," it can give the impression that the person is being patronizing or pushing the issue under the rug, or that "it's not that big of a deal." What seems minor to some, is a big issue for someone else. So, if someone feels overwhelmed by a circumstance and feels unable to get out of it, although they appreciate the reassurance of a friend or loved one, you don't want them to feel that their feelings of insecurity are invalid or stupid, simply because you know it's going to turn out for the best. At the end of the day, they have the right to their feelings, however seemingly unnecessary it seems to you or someone else. It shouldn't be about them feeling better just because you are right. If you're right, they may realize it later on, but remember that it's not about you, but them.

 

[arbygil]

You might not know it, but I needed this thread today, for entirely different reasons.

[YOUTUBE]4xA9pfaGGXg[/YOUTUBE]

 

[WellNoWonder]

You might not know it, but I needed this thread today, for entirely different reasons.

[YOUTUBE]4xA9pfaGGXg[/YOUTUBE]

Me too! *hugs*
Posted via Mobile Device

 

[Trifoilum]

Well perhaps its because when one is emotionally unstable or depressed one starts to loose all hope, they black out and not really analyze things logically, their emotions take over them on a uncontrollable state.

Also, in terms of emotional issues, I believe Raccoon nailed it. Self-located stress creates a blanket that blocks off the ability to see the grand scheme of things, methinks. I'm great with helping others with this when they're stressed, but the moment I hit a certain point myself, it's like my common sense gets surgically removed. Pressure does crazy stuff.

their uncertainty is less about you than how they feel about themselves and their ability to get through a situation. People have to come terms with things on their own, not because others want them to. So, it's not about whether you're right. They need to know for themselves and believe they can get through it and survive a situation, outside of what others feel. And for many, when someone says "it's alright," or 'it's going to be ok," it can give the impression that the person is being patronizing or pushing the issue under the rug, or that "it's not that big of a deal." What seems minor to some, is a big issue for someone else. So, if someone feels overwhelmed by a circumstance and feels unable to get out of it, although they appreciate the reassurance of a friend or loved one, you don't want them to feel that their feelings of insecurity are invalid or stupid, simply because you know it's going to turn out for the best.

Agreed to all this.
There's also pessimism.

Now there's factor towards the strength of the word themselves. Aside from a genuine assuring word, it's also a stock phrase, quick assuring phrase sometimes functioning just to shut people up. "awww, that's too bad. It's gonna be alright! Now shut up."

Not everyone, especially not people in a deep depression or stress, could separate which words are genuine and which words are not.

Also, in someone's life there would be lots of people who'd said that phrase genuinely. For every time the phrase fails to work, its effect slowly decreases, slowly becoming another empty words. (Or people went more pessimistic and cynical than before, but that's another thing. Or is it?)

 

[Gaze]

Now there's factor towards the strength of the word themselves. Aside from a genuine assuring word, it's also a stock phrase, quick assuring phrase sometimes functioning just to shut people up. "awww, that's too bad. It's gonna be alright! Now shut up."

Not everyone, especially not people in a deep depression or stress, could separate which words are genuine and which words are not.

Also, in someone's life there would be lots of people who'd said that phrase genuinely. For every time the phrase fails to work, its effect slowly decreases, slowly becoming another empty words.

Very true.