INFJs and "Conforming to Society"

NataljaC

NataljaC

Regular Poster
MBTI
EII-2Fi INFJ
Enneagram
1w2, 5w6
Before we get started, it should be established that I DESPISE any form of labeling. In fact, INFJ is the only one I've come across (so far) that can describe who I am with any degree of accuracy.

I've recently been called a "conformist to society." How ironic, given that I happen to be homeschooled all the way up until the 7th grade. Here's some food for thought. The very rebellion against society is a form of influence. As long as society is a reference point, one cannot possibly be completely independent from it.

I (usually) follow my conscience, and do what I think is right. If that's "society," then so be it. But it also works vice versa. As for the rest, I could really care less. In fact, if anything, I'm less of a conformist than the one who labelled me as such.

What are your thoughts? Do you follow instincts older than the birth of human civilization? Do you incorporate elements of society into your life as you see fit? Do you, for whatever reason(s), follow the bandwagon? Or do you disagree? Let me know.










EDIT: This thread is meant to discuss the topic, not me or whether or not I'm an INFJ. I'm living proof of one, have tested multiple times and never got another result. So please stick to the topic, regardless of whether or not you think I fit the parameters of this MBTI personality type.
 
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...Can you be an INFJ and despise labels? [MENTION=9401]LucyJr[/MENTION] [MENTION=731]the[/MENTION]
 
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lol, I do whatever I think is right. I don't much care if someone sees me wrong or takes it the wrong way (so long as it's benign). If someone develops a dislike or anger towards me then I will take action to correct any misunderstanding, but generally it doesn't concern me. Rules of social behavior, yeah I don't care. lol.
 
NataljaC said:
Before we get started, it should be established that I DESPISE any form of labeling. In fact, INFJ is the only one I've come across (so far) that can describe who I am with any degree of accuracy.

I've recently been called a "conformist to society." How ironic, given that I happen to be homeschooled all the way up until the 7th grade. Here's some food for thought. The very rebellion against society is a form of influence. As long as society is a reference point, one cannot possibly be completely independent from it.

I (usually) follow my conscience, and do what I think is right. If that's "society," then so be it. But it also works vice versa. As for the rest, I could really care less. In fact, if anything, I'm less of a conformist than the one who labelled me as such.




What are your thoughts? Do you follow instincts older than the birth of human civilization? Do you incorporate elements of society into your life as you see fit? Do you, for whatever reason(s), follow the bandwagon? Or do you disagree? Let me know.
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So much angst. Let me guess, you rebelled before it was cool to rebel, right?
 
the said:
So much angst. Let me guess, you rebelled before it was cool to rebel, right?
Click to expand...

On a literal level, rebellion has been "cool" since time began. And you're missing the point. I don't rebel, I simply follow MY WAY. Dogman has got it down:

dogman6126 said:
lol, I do whatever I think is right. I don't much care if someone sees me wrong or takes it the wrong way (so long as it's benign). If someone develops a dislike or anger towards me then I will take action to correct any misunderstanding, but generally it doesn't concern me. Rules of social behavior, yeah I don't care. lol.
Click to expand...
 
DonTaushMe said:
...Can you be an INFJ and despise labels? [MENTION=9401]LucyJr[/MENTION] [MENTION=731]the[/MENTION]
Click to expand...

many INFJs are known to have a history of unconformity. Others don't.
As for despising labels, I doubt so. That's more a Fi think. ENFPs and INFPs have the thing with labels, they don't like boxes.
 
NataljaC said:
Before we get started, it should be established that I DESPISE any form of labeling. In fact, INFJ is the only one I've come across (so far) that can describe who I am with any degree of accuracy.

I've recently been called a "conformist to society." How ironic, given that I happen to be homeschooled all the way up until the 7th grade. Here's some food for thought. The very rebellion against society is a form of influence. As long as society is a reference point, one cannot possibly be completely independent from it.

I (usually) follow my conscience, and do what I think is right. If that's "society," then so be it. But it also works vice versa. As for the rest, I could really care less. In fact, if anything, I'm less of a conformist than the one who labelled me as such.




What are your thoughts? Do you follow instincts older than the birth of human civilization? Do you incorporate elements of society into your life as you see fit? Do you, for whatever reason(s), follow the bandwagon? Or do you disagree? Let me know.
Click to expand...

Fe users have been warned they don't poses a moraly right conscience, they stick to the morals of the group. At least that's what MBTI says...probably because one of the developer of MBTI was a INFP, and Fi always complains about the "authenticity" of Fe's morality.
 
NataljaC said:
On a literal level, rebellion has been "cool" since time began. And you're missing the point. I don't rebel, I simply follow MY WAY. Dogman has got it down:
Click to expand...

Don't follow "your way", as cool as you think it sounds. Especialy if you are a INFJ...that's a honest advice I give you as a fellow INFJ.
 
LucyJr said:
many INFJs are known to have a history of unconformity. Others don't.
As for despising labels, I doubt so. That's more a Fi think. ENFPs and INFPs have the thing with labels, they don't like boxes.
Click to expand...

Wouldn't unconformity and aversion to labels be essentially the same idea?

By the way, I like closure. To me, life is a quest to define. But I do this on my own terms, not by the definitions others stick to me.
 
LucyJr said:
Not necessarely.
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Could you be a bit more specific? I understand that you have a certain way of seeing things. You may follow your version of "right," but your perspective is not self-explanatory, nor the absolute truth.
 
I'm someone who marches at the beat of his own drum, it is just the way it is, i know that i'm original, and creative, it haves it's own setbacks, but it haves nothing to do with rebelling against something, i'm just expressing myself.
I despise labels with all my heart, in highschool it was a weak spot f to be labeled and categorized, it still produces strong emotional reactions when this happens. To let someone unknown label you, define you, reduce you, judge you, to make a flawed idea of yourself a place in his tiny little mind is extremely difficult to accept, but i've learned to take it, and tell myself to relax.
 
I definitely don't conform, and that's been a huge problem for me because everyone seems to notice. I don't try to be contrary to society though, it just happens. I also don't like labels, but that's probably because most people mislabel and don't have a clear definition of the label itself.

Why are you concerned with what this one person told you anyway?
 
BrokenDaniel said:
...to make a flawed idea of yourself a place in his tiny little mind is extremely difficult to accept, but i've learned to take it, and tell myself to relax.
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That's a different way of wording it, but I actually agree. When associating with people, I want them to understand me for who I am. I don't always seek agreement; sometimes it's just my perspective I want them to be able to see. It's a matter of transparency, actually. Because any criticism or feedback they make based on that false idea of me would therefore be ignorant without the full truth. Constructive criticism only arises out of complete understanding.




aureliusandoinky said:
Why are you concerned with what this one person told you anyway?
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You're not the only one who's asked me this. The one who labelled me was actually a complete stranger. I took offense, because I regard every individual as significant; I am incapable of ignoring anyone. It's a form of basic acknowledgement and validation that I grant every human being. Though nothing someone can say will necessarily affect me, I will choose whether or not I will use it as a learning experience. In this case, a point was brought up that I felt should be mentioned.
 
NataljaC said:
Before we get started, it should be established that I DESPISE any form of labeling. In fact, INFJ is the only one I've come across (so far) that can describe who I am with any degree of accuracy.

I've recently been called a "conformist to society." How ironic, given that I happen to be homeschooled all the way up until the 7th grade. Here's some food for thought. The very rebellion against society is a form of influence. As long as society is a reference point, one cannot possibly be completely independent from it.

I (usually) follow my conscience, and do what I think is right. If that's "society," then so be it. But it also works vice versa. As for the rest, I could really care less. In fact, if anything, I'm less of a conformist than the one who labelled me as such.

What are your thoughts? Do you follow instincts older than the birth of human civilization? Do you incorporate elements of society into your life as you see fit? Do you, for whatever reason(s), follow the bandwagon? Or do you disagree?
Click to expand...

I think conformity needs to be distinguished into two types:
1. Unthinking conformity.
2. Intelligent conformity.

Conformity is a pejorative term to me when it implies that people will accommodate themselves to local patterns of behaviour/expressed opinion without thought, or understanding. -The kind of situation where people, when asked why they do something, or think something, reply "I don't know", or "That's what people do/think".

I however, see an intelligent conformity to be a reasonable and even praiseworthy position. Reasons for conformity may range from preferring social stability to trying to challenge the ideas/mores of people incapable of examining their thoughts/ways, to deciding that customs/ways of life are of entirely relative value - and so adopting a local custom and trying to establish one's own meaning for it.

For thinking people, however, there will likely always be some things at which they will be at odds with the others.
 
Robert Frost

The Road Not Taken​
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

If what people are doing makes sense to me then i'll go along with it. If I disagree with what they're doing then i'll plough my own furrow


​
 
muir said:
Robert Frost

The Road Not Taken​
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

If what people are doing makes sense to me then i'll go along with it. If I disagree with what they're doing then i'll plough my own furrow


​
Click to expand...

nice quote :)
 
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